Red Room
by BurningEmber100
Summary: No one really knows what Natasha Romanoff went through when she was a part of the Red Room. Now, everything has changed due to a machine Tony has built to go back in her mind . What will happen when the team discovers her life, her fears, and secrets not even she knows yet. And what will happen when something bad happens in the process of discovering who The Black Widow really is.
1. RR1 Blueprints

Chapter 1

The day started like any other in Stark Tower. The Avengers were getting ready to start the day and as always, Tony was bugging Natasha about her past.

"C'mon red, you know I could decode those case files in five minutes flat right? So why don't you just tell me? What's so bad about your past that you don't want anyone to know about?" Tony kept pestering her while the other Avengers nervously finished their breakfast. Clint shuffled uncomfortably.

"Leave her alone Tony. Her past is her past, and we are in the present now. Anything that happened then is over, and she's with us now. I trust her completely. So leave her alone before you piss her off." Natasha smiled sweetly at Clint, who let out a breath of relief. _Crisis averted,_ he thought. Every time Tony brings this subject up, he threatens her with cracking her case file, which he has never done yet. Whether it is out of fear or respect, he didn't know. But Natasha always got her revenge on him. She hated talking about anything from her past but Tony wouldn't give up till he knew.

Natasha stood up and walked around Thor and Bruce, to the other side of the tabled and leaned over to Tony's ear. Everyone in the room heard him gulp in fear. He knew she always got revenge on him, yet he kept pushing her. _Crisis not averted, _Clint thought.

"Tony," she said, "what have I told you about asking me that hmmm?"

"To not ask you that?" he answered fearfully.

She smiled. "Correct. Now, could you hand me the sugar?"

Knowing that he was about to be punished, he solemnly reached for the sugar to hand to her. He closed his eyes and waited. But nothing happened. She walked back over to her seat on the other side of the table and poured some sugar into her coffee.

"Thank you Tony," she said. She finished her coffee and then left the room.

Thor was left beaming. "That went splendidly! She didn't do anything to you Man of Iron! Maybe she has forgiven you?" They were ecstatic with how the encounter went. Every morning, Tony asked the same questions, and he usually got yelled at. He got off scott free today.

Tony smiled and then took a bite of his eggs. The others watched as his face suddenly fell.

"Who made these eggs." He asked.

Bruce answered with "Natasha did, why?"

"WATERRRRRRR!" Tony yelled as he ran to the sink. He turned the nozzle on and nothing came out. He then ran to the fridge and gulped down an entire container of orange juice.

"Tony! What's wrong?" Bruce asked in concern.

After catching his breath, Tony answered with "The eggs, she put hot sauce in my eggs. She knew I was going to ask her so she did it before I even came down stairs! Then she did something to the goddamn sink!"

Everyone was laughing at him and Thor almost broke the table in his glee.

"That was the best one yet!" Clint said as he was still laughing.

"Don't you guys get it?" Tony said angrily. "Everyone in this tower knows everything about each other, everyone but Natasha! It's not fair. How do we even know we can trust her? She could be spying on us for all we know!"

Clint stood up angrily. "What the hell Tony! She has saved your ass countless times and this is how you repay her?"

"Why won't she talk about her past with us then? What is she hiding!?"

"Perhaps she isn't hiding anything." Tony glared at Thor's remark.

"Then what, she's just playing with us?" he said angrily.

"No, perhaps she won't tell us is because it's too painful to talk about." Everyone stared at Thor. No one had ever thought of that and it took a god to bring it to light. Tony looked stunned for a moment. His face then turned back to anger and he stormed out of the kitchen.

Tony turned the corner and stopped suddenly when he saw Natasha standing there. She had heard everything.

"Natasha I-"

"Forget it Tony." She turned and walked off, leaving Tony feeling bad about what he had said about her.

He then took the elevator down to his lab to sulk.

"I'm so stupid! Why did I have to go and open my big mouth? Of course I trust her. But what has her staying so quiet. I'm going to get to the bottom of this."

Tony powered up his computer and pulled up her case file. He got busy with taking down the firewalls and cracking the codes that kept is so secret. After a while, he was one code away to finally getting some answers. Before he put in the code though, he stopped. He couldn't do it. He didn't know why but he couldn't bring himself to read her file. He clicked delete and sat back.

He was lost in his thoughts until a paper caught his eye. He pulled it out of his desk and smiled. It was his blueprints to his time machine. Well, not really a time machine but a machine that would theoretically bring a person or persons mind back in time. He had started this before Loki and his alien invaders appeared.

Tony grabbed the blueprints and walked to the back of his lab where he got to work on building the machine. He would go back and find Natasha. He would finally understand her and why she was the way she was.

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_**Sorry it's so short! I just got the idea and had to get it down. I hope you like the concept! Let me know what you think and what you would like to see as the story progresses! Red Room here we come!**_


	2. RR2 Fire and Fear

_**Thank you guys so much for the reviews! Guest, La Madone, Dyor, and storylover001, you guys rock! I've always wanted a fanfic like this so hey, why not write it myself! Thanks for the motivation!**_

Chapter 2

_Tony grabbed the blueprints and walked to the back of his lab where he got to work on building the machine. He would go back and find Natasha. He would finally understand her and why she was the way she was._

The next day, Tony was not at breakfast. Everyone wondered where he was since he never missed a chance to stuff his face.

"Tash? You didn't do anything to Tony did you?" Clint was genuinely worried that she did something to him in another bout of revenge,

"Relax, I haven't seen him since yesterday morning. Besides, it peaceful without him here."

"May I have his breakfast then my friends?" Thor was taking advantage of the extra food since Tony was MIA. He reached over to grab the plate before he got an answer and his hand was smacked away.

"No you don't big man," Bruce said. "I'll bring it down to him. He's probably in his lab." Bruce got the extra plate and journeyed to Tony's lab. When he reached the door, he found it locked. The door was never locked. He then knocked and waited for an answer.

"Who is- ow! Who is it?" Bruce heard a crash as if something had fallen.

"It's Bruce, Tony. Open up."

"I can't do that right now, I'm busy. No one can bother me until I get this project finished. No one, not even Fury himself can pull me away from this. Go away."

Bruce heard another crash followed by swear words from Tony before he said. "I have your breakfast Tony, what can possibly be so import-" The door suddenly opened with a sweaty Tony standing in front of him.

"Food!" He grabbed the plate and then slammed the door shut. But not before Bruce saw a strange machine in the works.

_When he starts a project, he doesn't stop for anything…except for food, _Bruce thought.

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The weeks passed and the team saw very little of Tony. Steve was still on a mission and Tony, Clint, and Natasha were working together on a case. The only time Tony would make an appearance was when they got a lead and had to go out in the field. Today, Fury had sent Natasha, Tony and Clint to a place in downtown where suspected arms dealers were preparing for a big sale. The case could be handled by regular officers but the word was that they had a device that could make a person immobile while chaos ensued around them, making it easy for the dealers to escape. If this weapon got into the wrong hands, there would be no telling what would happen.

The gang arrived at a warehouse and immediately spread out. Tony in his Iron Man suit made his way to the roof while Natasha and Clint snuck in through a window.

Clint immediately went left and Natasha went right when they got into the warehouse. They could almost read each other's minds when they worked together. They were close and Clint was the only one who knew some of Natasha's past. The little he know did not affect the way he saw her as a partner.

"Tony," Natasha said as she communicated through her earpiece. "There's no one here yet. How's it look from your position?" Natasha immediately let her senses roam as she tried to locate any other living being in the room. There was no one on the floor.

"Incoming. Three trucks just made their way through the back entrance. They should be there in three, two, one." Tony was keeping look out on the roof when he spotted the trucks moving their way to a gate. He relayed the info to Natasha and Clint before making his way down through a hatch on the roof to get a better look as to what was happening inside.

He could not see Natasha at all but he saw Clint. "Clint, your ass is hanging out. They are going to spot you in a heartbeat."

Clint peeked up and glared at him before pulling himself further into hiding. A moment later, the trucks pulled into the warehouse and men jumped out.

"I count 12 men, all armed. I don't see the device yet." He relayed the information as he watched the guys carefully. Two men then jumped into the back of one of the trucks and pulled out a metal case. They brought it to the middle of the floor and sat it down. He heard them start the bidding and the numbers were high. _That must be the device._

"Guys, I think the device is in that case. Prepare for extraction," Tony said.

He saw Clint pull himself from his hiding place and pull an arrow into his bow. He let it fly, watching it as it struck the case. He pulled back on the sting attached to the arrow and pulled the case to him. The men, all startled, pulled out their guns and started firing. Clint jumped away and then Tony finally saw Natasha. She darted behind the group and took two of the men out before they realized they were being attacked. Tony then jumped from his perch and joined in on the fight. He noticed that Clint had gotten a hold of the case and was opening it.

"Guys, it's not here!" he yelled at his team. Inside of the large case was a very complicated looking rocket launcher instead of the device that they were after. The men heard him and fired their guns at him while he took cover behind a crate. He fired arrows at a lightning fast speed and took out a few of the men.

When Natasha heard Clint yell that the device wasn't there, she fought her way to the trucks to look for it. No one saw her since they were distracted by Tony and Clint. When she got to the second truck, she found the device in a small box and grabbed it. She pressed her hand to the comm' link and said, "I have it. Let's wrap it up." She jumped from the back of the truck and she froze. One of the men had the rocket launcher and was aiming right for her.

"Nat watch out!" Tony yelled. He ran for the man with the launcher and tackled him, but not before the weapon fired. Tony reached the man just in time to surprise him and the rocket launcher fired onto the roof. Debris fell and crates started to catch fire. A piece of roofing caught Natasha in the head and she fell to the floor, dazed.

Clint saw everything happen from the corner of his eye as he took out the remaining men. He saw the warehouse catch fire and knew that they all had to get out of there. Suddenly, one of the trucks near him exploded and took out support beams and they fell, blocking his way towards the rest of his teammates, and blocking their way of escape. There was no way he could reach them. The smoke was getting too thick so he had to get out of there.

From outside, Clint saw the blaze consume most of the warehouse. He feared for his friends lives. Natasha couldn't be in there. She has to get out. She fears nothing in the entire world, except fire.

When part of the warehouse fell, Tony saw that their way out was blocked, and that he couldn't see Natasha anymore. He used his suit to push through the fiery debris to help his fallen teammate. When he finally saw her, she was just lying there. She had her arm wrapped around her legs in the fetal position. He eyes reflected nothing but fire and fear. Tony had never seen his teammate so afraid and defeated.

As Natasha lay there watching the flames consume everything, she felt herself fall into paralysis. She was so scared that she couldn't even move. Her mind kept flashing back to the one fire that changed everything all those years ago. She kept thinking about how _they_ found out her fear and used it against her. She was shivering out of pure fear, and then she lost her breath. Panic then set in.

When Tony finally reached her, her body started going into convulsions. "Natasha! Natasha what's wrong? We have to get out of here!" She started choking and he realized that she couldn't breathe. He could recognize a panic attack anywhere, since he suffered from them. But this one was far worse. He didn't know what to do. He scooped her thrashing body up into his arms and looked for a way out. He soon realized that the only way out was up. He powered up his thrusters and shot through the roof, all while holding his dear teammate close.

When Clint saw Tony with Natasha in his arms flying towards him, he immediately knew what was wrong. He felt powerless when Tony layed her down in the grass next to him and saw her gasping for breath. He was amazed by what he saw next.

Tony layed Natasha down in the grass where Clint was waiting. He then ejected his suit off of him and knelt down on the ground with her while listening to her chest. He heard nothing from her lungs so he started CPR. He knew she was still conscious but she couldn't breathe. He smiled to himself when she took a ragged breath a moment later. He picked her up in his arms and tried talking her through the attack.

"Natasha, you're okay, the fire is gone. I got you out of there. Shhhh it's okay. Just breathe for me okay? Take a deep breath." He heard Natasha take another ragged breath, this time on her own. Clint could only watch as Tony talked her through it. She was staring up at Tony with pain written all over her face. Her chest was hurting so bad. Tony's soothing voice was slowly calming her down enough for her to take small breaths.

"I'm sorry to do this Nat but it will help," Tony said. He then ripped part of her suit off of her chest so that she could breathe better. He couldn't help but smile when she took a deep breath and started coughing. She could breathe again.

"That's it Natasha, just breathe. Don't yell at me yet, you need your breath back first. Then you can yell all you want." She started breathing slowly but strongly, her coughing dying down. She couldn't believe what had just happened. Tony Stark had just saved her life.

After lying there for a few minutes recovering and not saying anything, Clint helped her to her feet. She then glared at Tony.

He sighed. "Okay, you can yell at me now, you can breathe again." Natasha turned to Tony and shakily walked over to him, noticing him tense up. She stood right in front of him and the next thing Tony felt was her arms around his neck. "Thank you Tony,'' she whispered.

"Umm, yea, you're welcome." He held her close, comforting her. He started to regret all those times he pestered her with questions about her past. He even regretted staring his project again for the sole purpose of exploring her memories. But after what had just happened, he knew it was all the more important to continue. He looked over to the warehouse and noticed it almost burned to the ground. There was no doubt that the device was destroyed.

Tony held Natasha for a good minute before noticing how tired and exhausted she was. She was trembling and without a word, he scooped her into his arms and made his way to their vehicle. Natasha was about to protest but before she could say anything, Tony said, "nope, don't want to hear it. I know what a panic attack feels like and they leave me tired. But yours, yours was ten times worse. I don't know how you are even conscious right now. Not shut up and enjoy the ride." She laughed at him and protested no further. "Clint," he said, "be a good little hawkey and grab my suit will ya'?'

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When the team got back to the tower, Tony saw that Natasha had fallen asleep. He picked her up in his arms and brought her inside.

"Tony!" Bruce exclaimed, "What happened to her? Is she okay? Do you need me to call Fury?"

"No, no Brucy Bruce, she's just tired. I'm putting her to bed," Tony said.

"Just tired? And she's letting you carry her?"

"Yes Bruce, now shut up." Just then, Thor walked into the room, dropping his pop tarts because of the sight before him.

"Man of Iron! You have killed Lady Natasha! Surely her pranks haven't pushed you that far!"

"She's not dead you air head. She's just sleeping."

"But you are carrying her! She never lets anyone carry her, or touch her. I once tried to pick her up and she kicked me in the-"

"Okay Thor, we get it. Now if you will excuse me, I'm putting her to bed."

Once in Natasha's room, he layed her gently in bed. How she didn't wake up was beyond him. Just as he turned to walk out of her room, he heard her say something.

"What was that Tasha?" he asked.

"You can do it," she said as she opened her eyes and looked at him.

"I can do what?"

"The machine, you have my permission." She then rolled over and immediately fell back asleep.

Tony was left stunned. How could she have known about his machine? He kept his lab locked up and not a single soul besides his had been in in that lab since he started working on it again. He left the room and then ran into Clint.

"How is she?" he asked.

"She's sleeping. What happened out there?"

Clint shifted nervously.

"You can tell me, I already know that she is afraid, no, terrified of fire. What happened to her?"

"I don't know really. All I know is every time she is around she is around it, she freezes up. Small fires don't affect her too much but the one today…I've never seen her that bad. She did tell me one thing though."

"What, what did she tell you?"

Clint began again. "She told me once that _fire made me who I am today._ That's it. She never says anything else about it."

"Well, thanks man. I'll be down in my lab if you need me." With that, he left and went to his lab. When he got there, he looked over at his machine and asked himself.

"_Am I doing the right thing?"_

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**Did yall like it? I hope so! I'm not sure if it's going to be a Natasha/Tony romance, I really just like the idea of them getting closer as friends. Let me know what yall think, your favorite part, and what you would like to see in the next chapter!**


	3. RR3 Into the Nightmare

**Thank you guys so much for the reviews! They have kept me motivated to keep updating as soon as possible! Yall rock!**

Chapter 3

The next day at the Avengers Tower, Tony was near finishing his machine. He kept running Natasha's words through his mind. _Fire made me who I am today. You can do it Tony. The machine, you have my permission._

He was in his lab hard at work. He was working on the control panel when he heard a small cough. He whirled around and saw _her_. She was just sitting on his desk, watching him work. She looked as if yesterday had never happened. She was back to her old self.

"Natasha! You scared the crap out of me! How the hell did you get down here? This room is secure."

"Psssh, secure. You do know who you are talking to don't you?" The red head was smirking at him. Her gaze flashed upward to the air vent.

"So that's how you knew about the machine. Why didn't you tell me?" Tony didn't understand.

Natasha jumped off of the desk and walked over to where Tony was working. She picked up one of his tools and distractedly played with it. She leaned against the chair and then looked up at him. "When you said you didn't trust me a few weeks ago, I knew that you really didn't mean it. You were just frustrated and I get that. I snuck through the air vents to put those all over your Iron Man suit to get back at you." She looked over to one of his work stations which was covered in Bob the Builder children's stickers.

"When the hell did those get there?!" Tony didn't know how he could have missed the 200 plus stickers covering one of his work stations.

"About an hour ago," she said. "I didn't want to waste them. Anyways, when I reached your lab, I noticed that you were trying to get into my case file. I was going to blow up your computer, but I stopped. I don't know why, but I let you keep hacking. I guess some part of me wanted you to know. And then you just stopped. I saw you press delete. That right there told me that you really did trust me, and respected my wishes, well, kinda. Since then, I've watched you work every day on that stupid thing and I've heard you over and over struggling with yourself as to if this was the right thing to do."

Tony smiled slyly at her. "Hey Ms. Stalker, you said to never crack your file to get to know you, you never said not to build a machine."

"Very clever Tony. The truth is, I want you to know. Clint knows some, but I just can't tell him everything. I can't tell anyone everything. It hurts too much. But after what we went through yesterday, I think it's time you all knew. So, let's get started."

Tony was left beaming. He couldn't believe how this turned out. He had imagined over and over the countless ways she would kill him for asking her to use the machine. He never expected that this would happen.

"Great! So you want to know how it works?"

"I get the gist of it but yeah," she said.

"Okay. We will both have to lie in these chairs and put these oh so fancy electrodes on. We will both be given an injection that puts us under into a deep sleep. When this here switch is flipped, the electrodes attached to you will transmit your memories from a certain point in your life into this machine. The machine will then send them to me and we will both be placed inside of your mind through the machine. It will be as if we are physically there, reliving the events. We will be able to talk to each other and walk around. This device here, will be attached to my wrist and will bring us to different places in time, inside of your mind."

Natasha was looking thoughtful. "But what if something goes wrong and we can't get out? What if it becomes too much and I want to leave?"

"Don't worry, I have a switch on this device that will take us out of there."

"How do you even know it is going to work? I mean, this is some pretty high tech stuff."

"I don't know that it will work." Tony said.

"What the hell Tony! You build all of this based on the hunch that it _might_ just work?"

"Ummm yep, pretty much." Tony flinched as she lightly punched his shoulder. Well, it was light for her.

"Whatever, let's just get started."

The two got hard at work. Natasha worked on the main machine, fine tuning it to fit her mind so that the transfer will go smoothly. Tony worked on the electrode part. He hid the part that would attach to her head, because needles were involved. He would deal with telling her later."

Tony and Natasha worked for two days straight, all withought leaving the lab. Food was sent down to them by a staff member. The two hadn't slept because they were so close. Since they were so engrossed in their project, Clint, Bruce, and Thor hadn't seen them and were worried that something could of happened. JARVIS told them that they were both in the lab but wouldn't say anything else about what they were doing. They decided to find out.

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"Shhh, I think I hear something!" Clint and the other two Avengers had their ears pressed to the lab door trying to hear from their missing teammates.

"What does it sound like my friend? All I can hear is nothing." Thor was trying his hardest to hear through the door but his ears weren't as sensitive as Clint's were.

"They are just talking. I can't hear what they are saying though. I think they are working on something."

Bruce could barely hear anything either. "What could they possibly be working on though? And together? That's odd," he said.

"Perhaps we could trick them into coming out? I saw something on the magic box once," Thor said.

"The magic box?" Clint and Bruce said in unison. "The television you mean?" Bruce asked.

"Yes, that contraption. May I give it a shot my friends?"

They looked at each other and then shrugged. "It couldn't hurt I guess."

Bruce and Clint took a step back, waiting for Thor to do whatever he was going to do. What he did next took them by surprise.

He pressed his finger to the speaker that led to the lab and yelled, "Help us friends! There is trouble in the meadow! Little Johnny has fallen into a well! We must go to his aid at once!"

Clint and Bruce exploded in laughter. They fell to the ground, holding on to their aching sides because of their uncontrollable laughter. Thor looked at them confused. From the lab, Tony and Natasha stopped working when they heard Thor's voice over the speaker. They also started laughing and walked over to the door to see what shrieking noise was.

When the door opened, they saw Bruce and Clint rolling on the floor and shrieking with laughter while a confused Thor looked at them. He was desperately trying to find out what made them laugh so hard. "What is it my friends? I saw it on the magic box and kind citizens came to the boy's aid! A furry creature by the name of Lassie even helped. Please, what is so funny?"

"Give it up Thor, It is a human thing," Tony said.

"My missing friends! I apologize, there is no Johnny in the well, it was just a ruse to find out what you guys were doing. See, I told you it would work" Thor said to the men still laughing uncontrollably on the floor.

"Not for the reason you think big guy." Natasha was laughing quietly as Clint and Bruce pulled themselves together.

Clint was stull chuckling when he faced Natasha and asked, "But seriously, what have you two been up to?"

Tony answered for her. "Come with me and we will show you. Is that okay Natasha?"

She nodded to him and they went into the lab.

"Thor," said Tony with his back turned, "don't touch anythi-" CRASH. Tony whirled around to face him and saw that he had knocked over one of his prototype suits.

"I believe the word is _ooops?_" Thor said as he looked guiltily to Tony.

"Its fine, Thor, just don't touch anything else," he said annoyed.

The group made their way to the back of the lab where their machine was located. Tony then explained to them what it did and what it was for. The group kept looking to Natasha as Tony explained that it was to be used on her. She avoided their gazes and instead busied herself with the final touches. The machine was ready.

The rest of the boys expressed their concerns and commented on how she doesn't have to go through with it, but Natasha shot down their concerns. After the arguing died down, the group left the lab to have dinner, and to get a good night's rest before the big day. Tomorrow was the day Tony has been waiting for, and the day Natasha had been dreading.

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When morning came, the Avengers assembled themselves in the lab to help Tony and Natasha through the experience. Tony was busy explaining to Bruce parts of the machine so that he could help if something went wrong. He would also be monitoring their body signs. There was a TV attached to the machine so that the other Avengers could see what Natasha and Tony were experiencing. While Tony talked to Bruce, Thor and Clint were reassuring Natasha. Finally, the moment came.

Natasha layed back in her chair which was reclined to where she was lying flat. Tony busied himself with attaching the electrodes all over her body. She was dressed in short black cotton shorts and a matching sports bra. She had protested at first but it was necessary so that the electrodes were exposed and so that her clothing didn't mess with the transfer. Tony on the other hand was dressed in a tank top and longer cotton athletic shorts since he wouldn't have as many electrodes.

"Okay Natasha, we have two more electrodes," he said. He pulled them out and that's when she saw the needles protruding from them.

"Tony! You never said anything about needles!"

"What, are you afraid of needles too," he said.

"Well no, but you still never said anything about them," Natasha responded grudgingly.

Tony laughed at her and proceeded to place them. "Well suck it up buttercup because here we go." He placed on needle into the side of her head, and the other was placed over her heart.

"See, that wasn't so bad. And look," he said as he held up two more needles, "these are for me and go exactly where yours go."

Natasha smiled at that and relaxed her body. She was all set up. Tony then layed in his chair positioned the same as Natasha's and was right beside her. Bruce helped Tony get his electrodes and needles put in and then powered up the machine. Tony attached the device to his wrist. Even though the device would be in the physical world, he would have access to it when he was linked to Natasha's mind. He had used a rare element that he kept from when the aliens attacked and it worked perfectly in this situation. He then had Bruce inject Natasha with the sleep aid and he waited for her to go under. But she didn't.

"Tash, that was a pretty powerful injection, you should have been knocked out." He lay there confused.

"Oh yea, I forgot to tell you about my enhancers."

"Enhancers?" he asked.

"Yes Tony, enhancers, just like Steve. Not really something I advertise. Just double the injection and I'll be out."

Bruce looked to Tony for conformation and Tony nodded. He gave more of the sleep aid to her and Tony watched as she drifted off. She grabbed his hand and Tony couldn't help but worry. She looked so peaceful, for the moment.

Bruce then injected Tony with his sleep aid and he drifted off to sleep all the while thinking of why and how Natasha had enhancers. But it would also explain a lot of how she always recovered quickly and seemingly moved at lightning fast speed.

Bruce, Clint and Thor all watched as Bruce flipped a switch and then watched as their friends drifted off into the nightmare that would soon consume them.

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Tony woke up freezing. He was so cold but why? He opened his eyes and saw nothing but white. There was snow everywhere. The world was white; there was almost no color except for a small flame beside him. He saw Natasha standing beside him with her red hair blowing in the wind. She didn't seem as cold as him.

"We made it?" he asked looking around. "Where are we? When are we?"

Natasha turned to him and said, "Stalingrad, 1935."

"1935?! But that would put you in your seventies, almost eighties!"

She just smiled and said, "Enhancers, as well as countless other experiments. Welcome to the Soviet Union Tony."

They had made it.

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**We finally made it! What did yall think? Let me know! And I've decided to just make it a Tony/Natasha story about becoming closer as friends. No romance! I am totally loving this story and will update as soon as I can!**


	4. RR4 Stalingrad 1935

**BOOM! Two updates in one day. Hope you enjoy this small taste of the Red Room. The next chapter will be intense.**

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Chapter 4

"_1935?! But that would put you in your seventies, almost eighties!" _

_She just smiled and said, "Enhancers, as well as countless other experiments. Welcome to the Soviet Union Tony."_

_They had made it._

"Come on Tony, let's get out of this wind." The wind was picking up and it was starting to snow harder.

It was almost unbelievable as to what the two felt. They were inside of Natasha's mind but they felt as they were out in the real world.

"Hmmm," Tony kept humming.

"What is it now." Tony looked deep in thought.

"I'm just wondering something. It's not important."

"What is it?"

"Well, I was just wondering, if we died in here, would we die in real life?"

Now that was a serious question. "I thought no one can see us here since we aren't technically, well, here?" Natasha was confused.

"Oh they can't see us or hurt us, I was just wondering if we say, freeze to death. Fall off of a cliff, stuff like that." He said all of this nonchalantly.

Natasha rolled her eyes at him. "Let's not find out Tony. Come on, we are almost there."

"Almost where?" he asked. He didn't get an answer. They walked for another ten minutes until Tony saw light ahead. "Civilization! Maybe its warm there." He looked to Natasha and saw her tearing up. "What did I say?" Again, she ignored him. They kept walking until Tony saw that it was a fire. There was a beautiful house ahead, and it was on fire.

Tony heard screaming coming from within. He couldn't see anyone through the blaze. "Tash, who is in that house?" Before he could get an answer, he saw a little girl jump from the top story of the house into a snowbank below. He had to admit that it was pretty impressive. The little girl got up unfazed and ran a little ways to escape the intense heat. She had on no shoes and was not dressed for the intense coldness of the night. She had on the most terrified expression and tears were streaming down her face. The thing that tore at Tony's heartstrings was the fact that her hair was a fiery red. The same color as Natasha's. He looked from the small child to his teammate. She was on her knees in the snow just staring at the house before her as it burned to the ground. He looked back to the little girl and realized that she mirrored Natasha. They were both kneeling in the same position, as if Natasha was reliving this event. This is where the fear of fire had started. He couldn't imagine watching as his parents burned alive and being able to do nothing about it.

"Мама папа вернуться к мне!" (Mama! Papa! Come back to me!)

Tony could hear the girl as clearly as if she was speaking English. That was the good part of Natasha working with him on the machine. Whatever was said in Russian would sound English to him.

The way the little girl screamed almost broke his heart. It was pleading and full of sorrow. He wanted desperately to comfort the girl, but he wasn't really there. The little girl was crying and Natasha had tears in her eyes. She looked up at Tony and said, "This is where they burned my house down. My father offended them somehow and they got their revenge. Him and my mother died in that fire." She looked over his shoulder and said, "And then _he_ came, after he set my house on fire of course."

Tony turned to see several men approaching the terrified girl. She didn't move when one of them knelt beside her and talked kindly to the girl.

"Little girl, how did you escape the fire?" the man said.

The girl didn't even look up as she told him that she had jumped from the third story window.

"You were not afraid little one?"

"no," she said simply.

Tony could see that the man was impressed. He nodded to his companions and said to them, "we have found her."

"My name is Ivan, Ivan Petrovitch. I am sorry but you parents are no more. Come with me little spider. I shall care for you." The little girl looked from Ivan to her house, and then back to him. She took his hand and stood up. "I am Natalia Alianova Romanova and I'm six years old. I no longer have a life here. I will go with you."

The way she said it was cold, as if her spirit was broken. Tony wanted to stop her, but knew he couldn't. As he watched the two walk away, he took the crying Natasha into his arms and let her cry for a moment.

"That was you?" She nodded into his chest and then pulled herself together. She took the lead and followed quite literally in her own footsteps.

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They arrived to a military grade truck and watched as Ivan and Natalia got in. Tony and Natasha also pulled themselves into the truck and sat down for the ride. Natasha simply looked out of the back of the truck as they rode but Tony, he glared at the man seated across from him. He couldn't help but notice the way he grasped the little girls hand almost possessively. As for the girl, there were so many emotions splayed across her face. Fear, pain, sorrow, hopefulness, and dozens more. She was no longer crying though.

An hour later, they pulled up to a large stone building. They had passed through heavily guarded gates. The gates were about fifteen feet tall and looked to be reinforced with razor wire. The group got out of the truck as well as Tony and Natasha. Ivan the knelt down to the little girls level.

"Now listen carefully, I have to place this sack over your head in order to lead you in there because it is top secret. But don't worry; I'll be holding your hand the entire time." Natalia nodded to the man and allowed him to slip the sack over her head. Tony and Natasha followed behind as she was led into a building and down a maze of halls, tunnels, and stairways. Tony's ears popped when they finally made their way to a small room deep underground. Ivan took the sack off of her head and knelt down beside her.

"Now, the only way you can stay here is if you pass a simple test for me. Could you do that?"

The girl nodded. She desperately wanted a place to belong since she turned her back on her old life. She was trying to be brave, just like her father had told her to be when they talked for the last time.

"Okay, now I want you to find your way back to the truck. Without any help." Tony couldn't believe it. He didn't even know how to get out of there and he wasn't even blindfolded. He noticed Natasha smile to herself. "Watch this," she said.

Withought a word, the little girl turned and went back the way they came. She confidently led the way back through the tunnels, halls, and stairs and made her way back to the truck. She made it there without a single wrong turn or a slow to her steps.

Ivan clapped gleefully to himself and told her that she had passed. Then she noticed his features change. He became stiffer and the smile left his face. His eyes became menacing and little Natalia became scared. He had stopped pretending.

"You are mine now. Welcome to the Black Widow program young Natalia." The little girl turned to run but was quickly caught by a large man behind her. She struggled for a moment before a needle was shoved into her arm. She then became unconscious and was dragged back into the building.

Tony was furious with the man as he followed them back inside. He quickly realized that Natasha was not with him. In fact, he didn't even remember her coming back out with them. When they made it to another room deep in the building, he noticed Natasha sitting on a strange chair. She got up when they came in and watched as the little girl was placed in the chair.

"Where did you go?" Tony asked.

"I didn't want to walk down those halls again. I hate them." Tony simply nodded and waited with the rest of them.

"Hey," he said. "How did you do that? Find your way back to the truck and all."

"I don't know. I could always memorize paths. That stuck with me even through the brain washings.'

After another few minutes in silence, he asked Natasha what they were doing.

"They are waiting for me to wake up. But I'm faking it. I woke up about five minutes ago. My father said that whenever a person wakes up, they should wait to open their eyes. That way, you could gather information without anyone knowing. It was a game we used to play every morning."

Without warning, the little girl shot up from the chair and ran to the closed door. Much to her dismay, she found it locked. She whirled around to face the men in the room and prepared to attack. One man grabbed her and she started to kick wildly. Ivan simply watched. She caught one man in the face and broke his nose. Tony was cheering her on until Ivan got bored and walked up and caught her by the throat. He picked her up and slammed her against the wall, all the while holding the small girl by the neck. "Now you listen to me. You will do as I say. I'm going to put you down and you are going to walk over to that chair and lie down. I will try not to make it painful unless you do something else stupid!" The man put her down and Natalia obediently walked over to the chair and layed down. A doctor then walked into the room and placed a contraption on her head and hooked her to a bunch of wires. The process took a while but it was finally complete.

"Nat, what are they doing to you?" Tony was deeply concerned for the child's safety. But she would live through it he knew because he was standing right next to the grown up version of the girl.

"They are wiping my memory. They started with that machine and then turned to other methods later on when the machine broke and almost killed me."

She turned away when the machine was turned on. Electricity shot through the machine and Tony watched as the girls back arched in pain. She let out a bloodcurdling scream as the last six years of her life were ripped out of her head. How could they do this to a little girl? She was only six!

Tony had to turn away from the girl's immense pain. It was too much for him. When it was finally over, he looked back at her. She had blood pooling from her nose and tears of blood leaked from her eyes. She was unconscious yet again. They wanted her awake to make the process as painful as they could. They could have simply done it when she was out the first time. This place was horrible already.

"Did it work?" Ivan asked the doctor.

"We won't know until she wakes up."

"Fine," he said. He walked up to the girl and whispered to her, "Welcome to Red Room."

Ivan then told the men to bring her to her room. Once again, the two Avengers followed the man and little girl. Natasha wiped her eyes, not noticing that Tony saw her. He didn't say anything though. The girl was placed into a room with no furnishings. The entire room was made of stone and was freezing. There was a small fire in the middle and a blanket in the corner. This was no place to live.

"This was my room for the next four years," Natasha whispered. The girl was layed down by the small fire and then left alone. The two Avengers stayed with the girl for a while before they left. Mostly so Tony could wind down from his anger.

"Did the brainwashing work?" he asked.

"Yea it did."

"But how do you remember?"

"I made them make me."

Tony looked at her to explain more but Natasha just stared into the fire, just like she did every single night in that room.

"Are you ready to jump Natasha?"

She replied with a simple nod and then told him to jump to tomorrow night. Little Natalia wouldn't be waking up anytime soon.

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**I decided to give yall a small taste of Red Room since I got off work early. How was it? They next chapter will be intense and not for the faint of heart. **


	5. RR5 Into the Flame, 24 Down

Chapter 5

"_Are you ready to jump Natasha?"_

_She replied with a simple nod and then told him to jump to tomorrow night. Little Natalia wouldn't be waking up anytime soon._

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Bruce watched with concern as his teammates monitors jumped to life as they went under the anesthesia. The TV screen turned on and the window to the world was open. He, as well as Clint and Thor, watched as they confronted the fire. There wasn't anything they could do to comfort their favorite red head since they were in the real world. It was up to Tony to take care of her.

Clint was impressed at Tony. He was being sensitive and caring towards Natasha, something he never thought he would see. He was also a little jealous that Tony was the one to accompany her through this event. He watched as Natasha fell to her knees in the cold winter snow, looking longingly towards her once beautiful and happy home. He walked over and squeezed his friend's hand, trying to comfort her. He knew she couldn't feel it but it made him feel better all the same.

Thor simply stood quietly and watched the events happen. He didn't quite understand Earths history or human emotions. He did know for sure though that this was a horrible time for Natasha and he would be there to support her when she woke up. When the little girl was put into the chair, he had to turn away and cover his ears. The screams were so horrible and it scared him that a human being could do this to another human, especially an innocent little girl. He looked over at Clint and Bruce and they were also facing away from the horror on the screen.

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The night after the brainwashing, the little girl was finally waking up. She looked around, dazed. Tony noticed that she didn't look scared, only confused. He watched as she got up and walked over to the door. She called out a simple hello and a few minutes later, Ivan, the doctor, and a few armed men came into the room.

"Hello there little girl, can you tell me your name?" The doctor began the interrogation to see is the brainwashing worked. Ivan looked on with a small grin on his face.

"I, I don't remember," she said. "Where am I? What happe-?" Before the girl could finish her sentence, she was sent flying across the room with a smack to the face. Her arm landed in the small fire and she let out a small scream as the flame burned her skin. The doctor glared at Ivan, who had smacked the girl for speaking out of order.

Ivan kept his face straight and watched the girl pull herself up. She walked back over to the men and stayed quiet, this time with a glint of fear and pain in her eyes. He noticed a small trail of blood lead from her lip to the stone floor below, as well as the large burn wound on her arm.

"You will only answer our questions, never ask them. Is that understood?"

Little Natalia looked at the scary man and nodded her head yes.

"Now, doctor, you may continue."

The doctor looked sympathetically to the girl and continued.

"So you do not know your name?

"No sir."

"Do you know where you are?"

"No."

"Do you remember what happened last night?"

"No."

"Do you have any parents?"

"I don't know." When she responded to this, she looked down to her burning arm. She missed the next question. She was fascinated by the blackened skin. When she didn't answer the question, the doctor saw Ivan moving in to punish the girl for not answering but he blocked him with his arm.

"Wait, I want to see something," he said. Ivan just looked at him strangely and then looked back to the girl. He then noticed the concentrated look on the girls face.

She was holding her arm, just looking at it. She then looked towards the fire and walked over to it. She stared into its flames for just a minute. Tony had no idea what she was doing. He looked over at Natasha for the first time but she was just simply watching.

Out of nowhere, the little girl jumped into the fire and started screaming. Ivan, the doctor, and the armed men all rushed to her aid and tried pulling her out.

"No!' she screamed. "They are in there! My parents! They are in the flames! I see them! Help me get them out!"

The men finally dragged her burned body out of the flames and Ivan looked pissed.

"Send her back to get her treatment," he said.

The doctor looked horrified and responded with "sir, she was just brainwashed yesterday, she needs to recover, and we need to have her wounds looked at!"

"I don't care! You have failed! She remembered!"

"Ivan, listen to me, it was just a trigger. If it weren't for the fire, she may not have even remembered. We just need to keep her away from fire."

Ivan thought about this for a moment. "No. we need to break her of this _trigger_. Use it against her. This is the only way. Now send her for her treatment, and then you may look at her burns. I'll be in my office."

The doctor looked at him stunned. How cruel could this may actually be? When the super serum is ready, how far will he push this little girl? He simply nodded to the man and had the guards pick the girl up and carry her back to the room she was in the night before.

Tony couldn't believe what just happened. He also couldn't believe how Natasha just stood there and watch herself be hurt like that, but that's when he noticed that she wasn't looking at the scene unfold before her. She was looking into the fire.

"C'mon Nat, let's go. Or do you want to stay here?"

"I'm coming." She turned on her heel and made her way to the room with her childhood self.

When they reached the room, the little girl was already strapped in the chair. They headpiece was put on and the doctor was about to flip the switch. He then sent the guards out to give the girl some privacy. He debated on whether or not to flip the switch but he knew he had to. Without looking, he flipped it. The girls scream tore through the silence once more as blood ran from her eyes and nose. This time Tony noticed a few drop come from her ear. Her back was arched again and she fought against the restraints, trying her best to get away from the pain. When it was over, she just lay there.

Tony was shaking from anger. He walked over to the doctor and tried to punch him square in the face but his fist simply went through, as if he was a ghost. It made him angry. He wanted, no, needed to hurt someone. His breathing became rapid and he was close to losing it, but then, he felt a cool hand on his shoulder. He looked and found Natasha standing there.

"It's not worth it Tony. In the long run, I deserve it."

"No one deserves this Nat. Not even you. You had no control over whatever you did. They did."

"Tony please, I need you to be strong. For me."

Tony then noticed the haunted look in her eyes. She wasn't dealing with this. He needed to pull himself together. He took a deep breath and then turned back to the scene before him.

The doctor was putting burn creams on the little girl and was humming soothingly to her. He saw her eyes flutter and she started to wake up. She looked up at the man hovering above her and once again, looked unafraid.

The doctor went over his list of questions again and this time, nothing happened to trigger her memory. He then went over who she was.

"Your name is Natalia and that is it. You have no last name. You are a ballerina and you are very good at it. You are to do anything that is said to you with no questions asked. No talking back, no questions, no hesitations. The man you are about to meet, you will call him father and he will be your instructor. Tonight, you train to do what he tells you. Got it?"

"Yes sir."

He then took her by the hand and walked her to Ivan's office. Her steps were shaky but this _treatment_ had no side effects like last time when she was unconscious for a whole day.

Ivan was over the top with excitement when he saw Natalia and that she was okay and knew nothing of her past. She was almost a newborn. She had no fear because she hadn't learned it yet. She obeyed every order withought hesitation. Through the next few time hops, Tony watched as young Natalia grew and became a dangerous killer by her next birthday. He watched how one wrong step would cause a blow to the head or a strike of a whip. He watched as she learned to be the best.

She was now being trained alongside 24 other girls in the Black Widow program. They trained together, and fought against one another. They all thought of each other as sisters, even though it was dangerous to be close to someone. You never knew when that person would be taken away. Natalia remained the favorite of Ivan and he had her training doubled. She was now extremely skilled at ballet and gymnastics. The way her body could twist and turn fascinated him. She was already skilled with almost any weapon.

One day, Tony watched as she sparred with one of the girls. The other girl stopped suddenly and asked Natalia where she got her burns from. Natalia froze. Her body was covered in burns, and not just the ones she got from when she was in the fire. There were dozens more from when she started to remember or said something and she was tortured, with fire.

Natalia almost started to cry. Father had said that in order to avoid punishments, she would be allowed to break whatever made her ask. She knew that she was burned when she said certain things, she just didn't know what it was anymore because all she could think about was the punishment that she would receive. She was surely broken now and never triggered. She was terrified of fire though. She saw father watching them and he gave her a nod. He had heard them.

Tony knew what was coming next. He almost wanted to cover his eyes but he couldn't. There was something beautiful about the way Natalia moved. The little assassin took a fighting stance and saw the look of regret in the other girl's eyes. The other girls in the room sensed that something was up and all crowded around. Natalia took the first shot. She flew to the ground and swiped her leg in a circle, knocking her opponent's legs out from underneath her. The other girl, trained for this type of situation recovered quickly and matched Natalia blow for blow until Natalia was able to flip over the girls shoulders and grab her head, flinging her onto the ground. She jumped onto the girl and straddled her midsection, prepared to choke the girl to death. The look of pure terror in the girl's eyes startled Natalia. She started to let the girl get up but lost her focus and was caught off guard when she was thrown off in a last attempt of the girl to escape the clutches of death. The other girl tried jumping onto Natalia but Natalia jumped up and grabbed the girl again, throwing her back onto the ground. This time, the girl landed on her feet but slipped in a pool of her own blood and Natalia didn't hesitate to bring her foot down onto the girls back, breaking her spine instantly, killing the girl. The other girls in the room showed no emotion. They knew that if someone died in Red Room, it was their own fault. They then went back to sparring with each other. Ivan walked over then and grabbed Natalia by the arm, dragging her out of the room. Tony and Natasha followed.

Tony saw how much this time hopping to horrible events was affecting the redhead. She looked as strong as ever but the way she now carried herself made Tony worry. He knew they would have to take a break from this soon. They didn't get tired, no matter how long they were in the dream state because in the real world, they were technically asleep. Natasha though, was looking real bad and Tony was deeply concerned. She didn't talk as much and all she did was follow him around and stare blankly at the horror around them.

Ivan pulled Natalia out of the room and slammed her against the wall. He looked down on her and was furious. She knew why he was mad though. She had showed mercy. Ivan wasn't sure what to do with her. She was his best girl and the rest of them could go to hell for all he cared. The serum was ready, enough for one girl; he only needed to test her out first. She needed a punishment and he knew just the one. He leaned down and whispered in Natalia's ear.

Tony strained to hear what he was saying. He looked to Natasha for an explanation. A look of horror covered Natasha's face and she broke down.

"Oh my God, not this, not this!"

Natasha started shaking, knowing what was coming next for Red Room. A panic attack was coming on and Tony rushed to her aid as she collapsed onto the floor. He heard the door to the room open and close and noticed that Ivan and Natalia had gone back into the room. But what was going to happen that made Natasha collapse like this?

"Go, Tony, you wanted to see," she said between gasps for air.

"It's okay Natasha, I don't have to, I want to make sure you're alright."

"I'm fine, now go."

"But-," he said before he heard screams come from the room.

"GO TONY!"

Tony reluctantly left his teammates side and opened the door. What he saw almost stopped his heart.

Natalia was dancing. It was so beautiful. But why was there screaming? Then he saw the blood. It was a dance of death. She was moving so gracefully it seemed like a dance. But she was killing them all. All 25 girls in the room were moving, being attacked by one girl, Natalia.

Tony looked on in horror; he turned back to the open door and noticed that Natasha was lying on the ground, still. She wasn't moving. He rushed back over to her and saw that she was unconscious and barely breathing. He had to get her out of there. He cradled her in his arms and pressed the button on his wrist that would bring them back to the real world. But it wouldn't work. Why wouldn't it work? He looked at Natasha's face and suddenly realized that he couldn't live without her. Her life was fading and it was his fault.

Then he had an idea. The rest of the guys were watching from the TV.

"Bruce! Get us out of here! NOW!" He felt a tingling as they began to fade from the dream world. He looked back through the door and saw that the room was red with blood and the girls were still fighting. She couldn't possibly kill them all, could she?

The test had begun.

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**I'm sooooooo sorry it took me so long to update. I'm in the middle of moving and I haven't had time recently. That you so much for the follow and favs! Love you guys! Review and give me some ideas! Also, Steve will be back in the next chapter. And what will happen to Natasha? Stay tuned!**


	6. RR6 Trapped and Connected

Chapter 6

"_Bruce! Get us out of here! NOW!" He felt a tingling as they began to fade from the dream world. He looked back through the door and saw that the room was red with blood and the girls were still fighting. She couldn't possibly kill them all, could she?_

_The test had begun._

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"Clint, calm down," Bruce said. They had just witnessed on the screen little Natalia kill the other girl who had asked about her burns.

"I can't Bruce, you do realize that this is her first kill right? This is probably with her all the time. Didn't you see it in her eyes?!" His fist slammed into a nearby table. "She didn't want to do it but she didn't want to be punished either."

Bruce understood where he was coming from. He wanted to get mad too, but he couldn't let himself. The other guy wouldn't hesitate to come out. Clint was shaking from anger. Bruce looked over to the body monitors and noticed that Natasha's heart rate was starting to increase. _It could be the stress,_ he thought.

"He is right my friend," Thor said. "They would have most likely have doused her arm with kerosene and lit it on fire like last time. Or maybe put out their smelly light sticks…cigars I presume, on her bare skin again. The possibilities are endless!"

Bruce processed this and glanced at the TV monitor again. There was something big happening.

"Oh my God, wh- what's she doing?" Clint had been watching the whole time and saw Natasha collapse and little Natalia go back into the room with Ivan behind her. Natasha's heart monitor was now jumping off the charts and Bruce ran to her side. He glanced up at the screen also and saw Natalia on a killing spree. He turned his attention back to the unconscious red head lying before him and ran through a list of things he needed to do, the first being to try and stabilize her.

Thor was frozen in fear for his friend. He watched as the little girl twirled and flipped, all the while landing killing blows on her victims with tears streaming from her eyes. She was provided with a small knife and blood was flying everywhere. She darted between one of the girls legs and cut into a tendon, causing her to fall down in pain. Natalia turned and brought the knife into her heart and Thor could have sworn he saw her lips form the words _I'm sorry._ She slashed and slashed until she was covered in blood and was the last one standing. Thor couldn't believe what had just happened. Then he watched as the little girl collapsed in exhaustion, her head hitting the floor and knocking her unconscious. He then heard a commotion on the other side of the room.

"Thor! We need you over here!" He looked to his friends and saw them trying to hold Natasha down. Her body was violently thrashing and they were trying to strap her down in order to keep her from hurting herself. He looked at the screen one last time and saw Tony call out to Bruce to pull them out of there.

"Bruce, the man of Iron has requested that you remove them from there."

"I already have, now come help me!"

Just then, Natasha's heart rate flat lined. Her thrashing body fell back limply and her head rolled to the side. A small stream of blood ran from her nose and she wasn't moving.

"Clint!" Bruce shouted, "Start CPR now!" Bruce then ran to the other side of the room, past the still frozen Thor, and grabbed the crash cart. He wheeled it over and placed the paddles to her heart and chest.

Tony watched from his paralyzed body. He couldn't move yet because of the drugs but he could see his friend dying. He put her through all of this just to satisfy his curiosity and now she was paying the price. He saw Bruce trying his hardest to bring his dear teammate back.

"Clear!" he called out. A surge of electricity flew into the unmoving body and made it jump. Nothing happened. He called out "Clear" again and this time the monitor spiked but flat lined again. "CLEAR!" he yelled angrily this time and sent the shock. The body jumped once again but did nothing more.

Clint looked over to him with tears in his eyes, knowing that there was nothing else he could do. Then he noticed Bruce turning green, and his clothes becoming smaller.

"Bruce, you need to calm down, take a deep breath, don't let the other guy take over." Bruce was furious. He couldn't save her and it was his entire fault. He could have done something when he first noticed the change in Natasha's heart monitor. He looked over to Tony who was still lying in the chair, trying to wake up from the drugs.

"Why not? I've failed! She's dead and there was nothing I could do to stop it!" As he finished his words, the other guy broke free. The Hulk was standing where Bruce once was and he looked pissed. The out of nowhere, a body crashed into the Hulk and sent him flying across the room. Thor had finally snapped out of it and come to the rescue. The Hulk grabbed the god by his leg and then flung him across the room. His eyes then locked onto Natasha and he made a step forward. He was struck by an arrow that simply bounced off of his thick skin but it made him mad. In a rage, he flew towards Clint and grabbed him by the throat, slamming him against a wall. When he was the Hulk, he didn't know what he was doing, but he did know he was about to crush this guy's windpipe. Then he felt something hit him across the back, and it actually hurt this time. He whipped around to face his attacker and saw a man with a red, white, and blue shield on his arm with a white star in the middle.

"What the hell is going on here?" Steve yelled.

"Natasha died and Bruce hulked out," Clint choked out.

Steve Rogers looked over to the other side of the room and notice Tony and Natasha. He saw Tony trying to move and Natasha not moving. Her body was at an odd angle and she had a rather large stream of blood coming from her nose. _She's dead? _Then all he saw was green when the Hulk snatched him up and threw him into Thor, who was trying to jump onto the Hulk.

Clint then jumped onto the distracted Hulk but was thrown to the other side of the room, colliding with Natasha, and knocking them both to the ground. Clint picked Natasha's limp body up and held her protectively in his arms as he kneeled and as the Hulk advanced onto them. Knowing that this was the end, Clint shut out the world and looked down at the angelic face that he was holding so close. He planted a last kiss on her forehead and then closed his eyes, holding onto the one he loved, but would never admit. She was the love of his life and if she was dead, he wouldn't mind dying too. The world would be too cold without her. He was giving up, but that's when he felt a small breath on his face. He opened his eyes and looked down at Natasha once more. Then he felt it again. He leaned closer and felt a breath stir from her lips. She was alive.

"She, she's alive!" he yelled, looking up. The Hulk stopped in his tracks at the words. He looked at the small body in Clint's arms and noticed color in the girl's cheeks. She was indeed alive. He felt himself calming and changing back. After a few moments, Bruce stood where the Hulk once was and then he fell to his knees in relief.

Steve looked around the room in pure confusion. He saw Thor picking himself off the ground, Bruce change back, Tony fall off the table in his efforts to wake up and Natasha in Clint's arms, still unconscious. "What the hell just happened?" he said.

Bruce pulled himself together and ran to Clint and Natasha.

"Clint, put her on the table." He said. There were no time for apologies; he had to check her out first. He hooked her back up to the machines and looked her over. She was still unconscious but she was breathing. Why wasn't she waking up though? Her heartbeat was still shaky but strong. He looked at her some more but then noticed cuts along her body.

"Did I do that?" he asked fearfully.

Clint answered with, "No, I wrapped myself around her when you, um, threw me into her so she wouldn't get hurt. I don't have any cuts either." Steve walked over to get a closer look as well as Thor. Tony was still lying on the floor but he could feel his legs now but was trying to figure out how to get them to stand up. He still couldn't talk yet though.

Bruce looked closer and saw that she had a long gash going up her side, one that would need stitches. She also had a bruise on her forehead and more bruises, scratches and cuts covering her body, it looked as if she had been up against the Hulk as well.

Steve, still not understanding what was going on let his eyes wander around the room. He saw a strange machine and two chairs hooked to them. Behind them was a large TV monitor with a movie playing, a gory one at that. There were girls lying all around the room, dead, and covered with blood. The only thing moving was a man standing over one of the girls grinning from ear to ear. Steve walked over to the movie and studied it. The man was standing over a girl with fiery red hair, just like Natasha's. In fact, she looked just like Natasha, only younger. He looked at her closer and saw that the girl was breathing, but she was also bleeding as well. She had a long gash going up her side and a large bruise on her forehead. There were also various other bruises, scratches and cuts covering the little girl. Then something hit him. The girl's injuries, he looked back over to Natasha and noticed the extremely similar cuts, bruises and gashes.

"Guys…" he said. The gang all looked over to him and then to the screen. They walked over to it and looked at what Steve was looking at. Then Tony found his voice.

"That screen should be off since we got out of there. It must be broken." He walked over to Natasha and saw her battered body. Then he looked at the screen that the others were looking at. He realized what they were looking at. Natalia had the same injuries as Natasha. He froze in horror. This couldn't be happening.

The others ran back to Natasha's and indeed, the injuries were the same but how? Clint squeezed her hand and looked back over to the screen. He watched as Ivan drew a knife from his pocket and kneeled down to the girl. He put the knife to the little girl's chest and carved an intricate looking spider into the skin. Clint, Thor, Steve, Tony, and Bruce all gasped in horror as Natasha's skin opened up on her chest and a spider carving appeared, leaving the skin torn and bleeding.

Tony almost passed out from the horror. "She's still in there. The two girls, they are one now. It's all my fault. I have to get her out of there."

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**My goodness! Thank you all so much for the reviews and follows! **_**Carolzocas**_**, I do not mind the long review, I love it as well as your thoughts! Your philosophy teacher would be proud. And **_**ally**_**, no IronWidow haha, Clintasha all the way! Although it won't be focused too much on that kind of stuff. All of your reviews and ideas help me keep going so keep it up! Gimmie ideas for later chapters! Peace!**


	7. RR7 Simply Existing

Chapter 7

_Tony almost passed out from the horror. "She's still in there. The two girls, they are one now. It's all my fault. I have to get her out of there."_

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Natasha woke up feeling tired and sore. Her memory was still fuzzy but she remembered killing her friends, no, her sisters. Wait, she did that years ago. Why would she be remembering that now? She tried getting up but then noticed her body strapped to a chair. Slightly panicked, she looked around the room and saw a man with his back turned from her. It was Dr. Andrei, the one who was always so nice to her during her "treatments" when she was in Red Room. But he died long ago. He was fiddling with a vial and calculating a dosage. From the looks of it, it looked like there was only enough liquid in the vial for one person. She knew it was injected into her so long ago. The super serum that Ivan had promised to the girl that "won." She never imagined that the test would be to kill every single girl she had trained alongside of. Natasha tried to close her eyes at the memory but opened them again when she heard the door open.

Ivan walked into the room feeling extremely excited. Today was the day the super serum would be put into action. After years of waiting for it to be ready, it was finally in his hands. He saw Natalia looking at him and he just winked at her. He then walked over to the doctor to prepare for the procedure.

"Are we ready yet Andrei?"

"Sir, what if it doesn't work? It has taken years for it to be developed and this is all we have. Plus, we don't know what it will do to her. She is the best and you completely went against orders and had the other candidates killed." Dr. Andrei was desperately trying to voice his concerns to Ivan but he never listened.

"I said, is the serum ready, doctor?" Ivan was growing extremely impatient. He was ready for this to work so he could move forward with his plans. He had made a lot of enemies over the years and it would be a relief to have them off of his back. He would send Natalia after them.

"Yes, it's ready. Let's begin."

The two walked over to the young girl and watched her look fearfully up to them. She had not said a word since she woke up strapped into the chair.

"Natalia, are you ready?"

No one had called Natasha that since Red Room. Wait, she was in Red Room? But how? They had her strapped down but nothing was supposed to be able to hurt or touch her, and there was a stinging on her chest and she felt as if she had lost a lot of blood. Then it hit her. Natasha was Natalia. She was trapped inside of Natalia's mind. And she could feel everything around her. She had no control over her movements. She was simply existing inside of the young girl, watching and feeling all over again.

She wanted to scream, but she couldn't; she was trapped. She tried to close her eyes but it wouldn't work. She was helpless. Natasha in that moment, wanted to die.

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Natalia watched as the doctor and Ivan approached. She knew she was going to be injected with the serum. The only thing she could do was wait for the agony. And then it came.

The needle was stuck into her vein and the evil liquid quickly spread throughout the girl's body. It felt as if she was on fire, again, but this time it was ten times worse. Her body started convulsing as she pulled against the restraints. She pulled so hard in her agony that there was a small cracking noise heard in the room. Her wrist had broken, but she kept pulling on the restraints. Harder and harder she pulled as the serum coursed through her body. She started feeling stronger, could think more clearly, and a million other things at once. The pain intensified to the point where she almost blacked out.

To see a child suffer like this is horrible but it only made Ivan happy. He would have his very own super assassin to toy with. He couldn't keep the smile off of his face as the little girl before him convulsed and broke her body in order to escape the pain. The smile was soon wiped off of his face when she broke through her restraints and jumped off of the table. No one should have been able to break those bonds. She was indeed changing.

Natalia was on fire. She pulled as hard as she could at the restraints, ignoring the pain in her wrist, and finally broke free. She jumped off of the table and ran to the corner of the room. She couldn't think straight and she felt as if she had no control over her body. It just did what it wanted. Maybe it was the serum working its way through, she didn't know. She fell against the wall and shrunk down, trying to escape the invisible flames. She pulled at her skin, scratching until she was bleeding, trying to put the pain out. All the while this was happening, Natasha, still trapped in Natalia's mind, could only silently endure this pain a second time. It was tearing her apart from the inside out and she tried her hardest to block it out, but in vain. She screamed along with Natalia, not being able to escape the pain. This by far was the worst pain she had ever felt in her life and there was nothing she could do to stop it. She remembered this moment every single time she saw fire. It brought her back to all of the pain and suffering she went through just to be used by a sick and sadistic man.

Natalia felt as if she were thrown into a volcano, reduced to ash, and then fire set to the ash until there was nothing left. To go through this twice was enough scar someone for life. She couldn't think anymore, she couldn't breathe, she couldn't even feel. She became numb to life around her. As the fire left her body, she was left shaking on the ground. She couldn't remember anything. The agony basically brainwashed her. She was another person. Natasha on the other hand was having trouble hanging on to her memories as well. The intense pain is supposed to make you forget.

Ivan and Dr. Andrei watched nervously as Natalia went through her ordeal, hoping that she would come out of it alive. After ten minutes of watching her tear at her skin, she finally stopped. Dr. Andrei ran over to her to check out her injuries and found her arms and legs bleeding profusely. He gently led her back to the table to fix her up. After he grabbed a rag to press on a gash, he found that it had already stopped bleeding. Upon a closer look, he was surprised to see that the wound was closing itself up.

"Ivan! Come and look at this! She's healing!"

Ivan ran over to look and was ecstatic to find that the serum worked. It was time to send her into the field for a test run.

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"What the hell Tony! She's trapped? How can she be trapped in there if you got out!?" Clint was furious. Natasha looked so pale and miserable laying on that table. She was going through hell.

Tony yelled back at him. "I don't know! Everything was the same with the hookup…except for her crystal. Maybe that did something. The hell if I know." He was frustrated at the whole situation.

"What crystal Tony?" Bruce asked him calmly, knowing that Tony liked to put twists into his experiments without having them tested first.

"One I picked up after the Chitauri invasion. It had amazing qualities and seemed perfect for the machine."

"Man of Iron, please tell me that this is one of those Midgardian jokes. Chitauri crystals are extremely dangerous, and are banned from Asgard. They are unpredictable and if you used one, it may be too late to save her." Thor had never sounded more serious and worried.

All heads, Thor, Bruce, Clint, and Steve, turned towards Tony with concern.

Tony was now ten times more worried. He should have talked to Thor first about using alien crystals. "Ummmm yea, I used one."

"What the hell Tony!" Bruce yelled.

"It was the only thing I could think of to link her mind to the machine and have it work! I'm stupid I know and I'm sorry. Now please, help me save her." Tony was practically in tears at this point.

The teams angry faces softened a bit at his plead. Tony rarely ever apologizes at something.

Clint breaks up the moment with "I hate to break up this pity party but something is happening on the screen."

Everyone looks to Natasha's screen just in time to see a needle shoved into Natalia's arm. They all knew it was the serum, except for Steve. He missed that part of the conversation.

They stood by in horror as their teammate thrashed on the table in pain. They watched as tears streamed down the sleeping Natasha's face and as her wrist broke. They watched as her skin tore open and listened to her screams. Bruce had to leave the room because he was getting too upset and didn't want to hulk out and hurt her. Thor, Steve, Clint, and Tony watched as their teammate was tortured to the brink of submission. They never wanted to hear her scream like that ever again. None of them could imagine being in that much pain.

After the ordeal was over, Bruce came back in to observe her injuries. They all crowded around to watch him work, they didn't want to leave her side.

She had claw marks all over her arms, torso, and legs from her trying to release the pain from within. She had broken through her restraints from the pain but remained on the table. Her wrist was broken as well as all of her nails. She was a bloody mess and it made it hard to see any other injuries. Bruce ordered a blood transfusion because of all the blood loss and also a morphine drip. He hoped that this would help her wherever she was.

As he was addressing her wounds, he discovered that they were already healing. He looked to the screen along with the rest of the Avengers and they saw that Natalia was also healing.

Natasha had kept from the avengers that she had a super serum similar to Steve's. It was never a big secret but it is never fun to tell someone your age, especially when you are older that all of them, even Steve. The Black Widow had been enhanced by biotechnology that makes her body resistant to aging and disease and heals at an above human rate as well as psychological conditioning that suppresses her memory of true events as opposed to implanted ones of the past without the aid of specially designed system suppressant drugs. Due to the Super-Soldier Serum, the white blood cells in her body are efficient enough to fight off any microbe, foreign body and others from her body, keeping her healthy and immune to most, if not all infections, diseases and disorders. Also, it takes quite a bit for Natasha to become intoxicated. Her agility is greater than that of an Olympic gold medalist. She can coordinate her body with balance, flexibility, and dexterity easily.

Steve was amazed when he was told this. Here he thought he was alone but his teammate was almost just like him. Clint told him all about it so it would distract him from the red head. Natasha had confided this information to him on a mission a few years back.

"But why did her body react like that and mine didn't?" Steve asked him.

"The serum they used on her was the first ever in existence. It was way more powerful than yours. I don't know how you received the serum because Natasha told me that she tracked down the list and destroyed it before more could be made. What you got was the more diluted version I guess you could say."

Steve was amazed and instantly felt closer to the red head. He now had someone to relate to, then a question dawned on him. "Is she stronger than me?"

Clint smiled mischievously.

"What?" Steve asked him.

Clint, still smiling at a memory told him a little story. "You know the titanium wall that used to be in the training room that you used to bounce your shield off of since it was too strong to try and penetrate?"

"Yes…" Steve said.

"Well, me and Nat were training one day and she noticed your practice shield still in there. She gave me this look and then went and picked it up. Without spinning it to give it any momentum like you do, she flung it into that wall and it went clear through. That's why it's not there anymore."

Steve simply could not believe it. He had tried and tried to get his shield to break through and here goes Natasha in one try. He couldn't help but laugh to himself. He was impressed. He looked over to her and saw that more of her wounds had healed, the superficial ones at least. For him, it would have taken him a little longer to heal.

Thor listened intently at the story and was not so impressed. "I could hurl Mjölnir at the wall and have it go straight through my friends. Please, why are you so impressed?"

Clint rolled his eyes and said, "Thor, buddy… you're a god. We are not."

He thought on this a moment more before finally accepting the answer. He was still not so accustomed to Earth.

Tony could not get into Clint's story. He was assisting Bruce with patching up Natasha and all he could think about was, _this is all my fault, this is all my fault, this is all my fault. _If only he had not used the crystals. He didn't know what to do. In a sudden burst of anger at himself, he ended up yelling "What am I supposed to do!"

The room got quiet. Everyone tried to give suggestions but Tony knew they wouldn't work. Except for Thor's suggestion, it could definitely work, but it was a crazy plan. They all tried to find ways for it to happen. Should they walk right in and demand it? Should they go undercover? Should everyone go, or just Thor and another person? After nearly an hour of arguing and Tony winning, they reached a solution. They were going to go undercover and break him out, even though they hated his guts. He knew more than them about Chitauri crystals.

Loki could be their only chance.

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_Tadaaa! Sorry for the long wait, I haven't abandoned yall. I finally moved and then had to go to Arkansas for a canoe race. But I'm back! Thank you all for the follows, favs, and reviews! There will be no romance going on, at least not at this point. I like just plain ole action. The only pairing would be Natasha and Clint I think, but I'm not focused at all towards a romance story. Natasha and Tony are just friends, no romance there._

_I would like to know some of your ideas and things you would like to see happen in this story. I think it would be fun to add some of your ideas. Just let me know! Thank you all!_


	8. RR8 Cold and Calculating

RR8

Thor and Tony were going to the Asgardian prison and breaking Loki out to help. He knew Chitauri crystals better than anyone. Their plan was in action.

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In a daze, Natalia let her guards lead her back to her cell. She immediately went to the farthest corner and curled up in a ball, letting sleep envelop her. The darkness was a welcome reprieve to what she had just been through. Never in her life had she ever imagined that sort of pain even existing. Well, she didn't think so, she couldn't remember anything that had happened before the serum was injected into her.

Natasha also welcomed the sleep. Maybe she would feel better after she woke up. Her memories were fuzzy; she was barely hanging on to her friends, but they were still there.

A few hours later, Natalia woke with a start. The door to her cell banged open and at least 15 to 20 soldiers rushed in with guns drawn. She swept her gaze across the crowd. She noticed the young soldier in the back left, hesitantly draw his gun when he entered. _Hesitation will get you killed_. He would be easy. She noticed one of the men had a slightly off gait, maybe an old leg injury. She would use this to her advantage. She noticed other things, slight hesitations, aggression that would make a person make mistakes, overconfidence. She noticed the type of guns they had and immediately knew how they functioned. She saw batons hanging from everyone's left side, as well as tasers, and she noticed the small window in the corner of her room with a face in it, watching how she would handle the situation. All of this, she noticed in less than five seconds.

Natasha barely remembered this moment. She couldn't quite place what happened next. But she didn't have to wait long. Natalia spun into action when the overconfident soldier took a brave step forward and pulled the trigger. The bullet hadn't even left the barrel when she shot to the side and took out the young soldier who hesitated when he ran in. She took him out with a blow to his head. She then heard bullets flying and she dodged every one of them. How did she know how to fight like this? She couldn't remember but chalked it up to muscle memory. She must have done this a lot. A few stray bullets hit some of the men, making her job easier. She then jumped onto one of their shoulders, wrapping her legs around his neck and falling backwards to grab his legs and throw him to the ground. Without hesitating, she swung her leg in a circle and tripped two more guys. She then punched the down men in the throat, ripping one of them out. She flipped backwards into a fighting stance and three men advanced on her, batons drawn. One man went to hurl his baton into her side but she caught it mid swing. She looked into the man's eyes with as much hate as she could find. He looked into her eyes and was terrified. He was in that moment more afraid of her than he ever was at Ivan Petrovich, the most evil man in the world. Natalia ripped the baton from the man's hand and slammed it into his rib cage, instantly hearing it shatter. She actually smiled at the sound. She was surprisingly enjoying herself. Looking left, she barely escaped another baton from crushing her skull. _Don't think, just act._ Dropping the baton in her hand and grabbing the one that barely missed her skull, she pulled on it, making the soldier holding on fall. She quickly brought her foot down on his exposed back and snapped his spine in half. The remaining of the three drew his side gun and didn't even have time to cock it before it was taken from his hand and shoved into his mouth and fired. Again, Natalia smiled as his brain was blown out.

The rest of the men in the room looked terrified. Their boss, Ivan Petrovich had ordered them to take out a young girl who was now 8 years old. They didn't care why. When Ivan ordered something, you did it. No questions asked. When they ran into the young girl's cell, they all saw her jump up and immediately take a fighting stance. Only a few of them actually saw her cold, calculating eyes run over the group. Before they knew it, this strikingly beautiful young girl, with fiery red hair, took out over half of the team in less than a minute, without a scratch. They watched in horror as she killed some of the best soldiers the Red Room had to offer. And she was…smiling? Ivan had damaged this girl to the point where she was actually enjoying herself, leaving behind all she knew for a new life of killing and serving Ivan, just like the rest of them had. But this girl was different, she was fast, so fast that everything was happening in a blur. Bodies fell to the cold stone floor as she moved about the room. She was strong too, flipping grown men to the ground like they were nothing. Cold and calculating this girl was. She seemed to avoid the few men left alive, who were now at the middle of the room cowering beside the small fire that seemed to never go out. Playing dead. Maybe she would leave them alone and they could attack her when she let her guard down.

When Natalia saw no more soldiers advancing on her, she stopped moving and gazed around the room. Dead. They were all dead and she made them that way. She was good at killing. It was the only thing she knew since waking up. She might as well embrace this life that was now given to her. She would take any challenge. Then she saw movement. She whipped her head towards the fire and saw the remaining dead men. She listened. She heard a steady beat, four different sets of beats. Heartbeats? Then she saw one of their chests move again. The bastards were playing dead. She then noticed the fire and her heart stopped. Why was she afraid of fire? She didn't know. She walked closer to it, keeping in mind that there were four men faking death. She stared into the fire, hoping it would bring back some memory of who she was or why she was so afraid of it. But noting came. The men were far enough back from it that she could kill them without touching the fiery flame. She sighed and picked up gun, aiming for the closest man and shot him in the head. He didn't even see him coming. The remaining three men knew their cover was blown and took their tasers, rushing her. Natalia simply gripped each hand that held a taser and thrust them at the other persons, having the men tase their partner to death. The last man just stood there.

"Please, have mercy!" he screamed.

_Mercy?…Don't ever show mercy._ She walked up to the terrified man and put her hands on either side of his face. She had to stand on her tiptoes. She smiled sweetly at him and then snapped his neck.

The old Natalia was gone.

Natasha found herself slightly enjoying herself as she moved in sync with Natalia. Her memory was even fuzzier and she couldn't remember her friend's names. Were they her friends? Why would her friends leave her there? No, they couldn't be her friends. They were another test that Ivan had made. Yes, that was it. It all made sense now. Those people were all in her head. She was Natasha Romanoff, grown up version of Natalia Romanova. Ivan had put her in her childhoods head in order to train her more. Double training meant double the deadliness she was capable of. That made sense right? It had to. Her name of Natasha must be a cover Ivan made. Yes, she would make him proud.

Natalia looked around the room again at her handiwork. She then noticed the small window again. The face she saw was no longer there. Instead, it appeared before her in the door way. She didn't consider the man a threat. She stood there and allowed him to walk up to her. He placed a confident hand on her shoulder and asked if she knew him. She did, in a way, so she nodded her head.

"I'm Ivan Petrovich, but you are to call me Father now. You are my best creation and you are mine. Do you understand?"

Natalia, along with Natasha in her mind, nodded yes. Natalia couldn't explain it but she knew she had to take orders from this man.

"Yes, Father." She smiled and submitted to his every wish and order. She was now the Black Widow.

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Thor and Tony had formulated a plan to break into Asgard. They had left immediately and that left Clint, Steve, and Bruce alone with Natasha. The continually monitored her vitals and watched what happened on the screen. She had been sleeping, as well as Natalia, for a few hours until soldiers rushed in. They watched as she attacked them and killed 18 highly soldiers without breaking a sweat. Clint and Bruce looked to Steve wondering if he was capable of that. Steve simply shook his head no. Natalia, this early with her serum, was far more powerful than Natasha was now. It must have been because the serum was fresh in her system, and over the years, it slowly wore off. Natasha was still a force to be reckoned with, but she was slowly losing the serum. It would be years though before it was completely out of her system at the rate she was going.

This, the boys knew. But what they didn't know was…the Natasha they knew was fading. They could only see Natalia on the screen since Natasha was in her mind. They didn't know that she was losing her memories. They didn't know that she thought this was another test. They didn't know that the moment she finally woke up, she could kill them all.


	9. RR9 The Blind See

RR9

After saying goodbye to the other Avengers, Tony and Thor started their journey to Asgard. When they got to the portal site, they went over the plan again.

"You're sure your father in in Odinsleep?" Tony asked. Odinsleep is the one time a year that Odin sleeps in order to regain the strength he needs in order to keep his realm safe.

"I am certain my friend. Heimdall will know what we are doing though. He is all seeing. If he lets us pass, then we know we will succeed in bringing Loki back to the prison. He would not let us pass if we were to fail." Thor sounded confident that the Asgardian sentry would let them pass.

Tony was a bit skeptical but trusted Thors judgment. "Well alright then, lead the way. This outfit is ridiculous enough."

Thor laughed at Tony's new outfit. He had his iron man suit on but without the hand pieces so that he would look more god like. He had on raised boots over his suit in order to make him taller, and he was wearing a red and gold cloak to hide his suit. He could almost pass as a god if you squinted hard enough.

Thor called to Heimdall and the portal opened almost immediately, a promising sign. The two stepped in and all Tony had to do to keep from getting sick is closing his eyes and picturing Natasha lying on that table back in his lab, scared and broken. This mental image gave him the strength and determination to go through with the journey to another realm.

When he opened his eyes, he was amazed to see all of the gold and rainbow colors before him. His eyes followed the colorful Bifrost bridge all the way to the palace on the other side. Then all of a sudden, a large figure appeared before him. It was Heimdall.

Thor cautiously chose his words to speak to the guardian. "Heimdall, my friend. You know what we are to do. We are running out of time and we need him. Allow us to bring Loki back with us with my word of returning him. In our haste, no one will know that he is missing."

Heimdall said nothing. Instead, he stared at the two before him before giving a sigh and nodding his head.

"Thank you my friend," Thor said happily. Tony and Thor went to move on until Heimdalls giant hand stopped Tony. Tony looked up at the large man with a bit of fear in his eyes. For the first time, Heimdall spoke.

"I am only allowing this because she is the key to unlock the part in him which is good."

Tony didn't understand. Before he could question the god, he had already turned and went back to his post. Tony just shook his head and caught up to Thor on the Bifrost.

"What did he say my iron friend?"

"Nothing, let's go." Tony was so confused but he had to put that out of his mind and continue with the mission.

When they got to the other side of the Bifrost, Tony followed Thor through the hallways and only when they started to go down did Tony speak.

"So are we just going to walk into the prison and grab a key, unlock Loki's door, and walk out? This is Asgard, I imagined horrible creatures and fighting and loud noises.

Thor laughed to himself. "There is nothing we can't handle my friend. We are AVENGERS!" His voice boomed down the hallways.

"Thor, buddy, no one can know we are here, sooooo wanna keep it down?"

"Oh yeah, it's just that my dear brother and I would hold contests to see who could be louder. I got carried away, it won't happen again." Thor looked a little sad. He missed the days of him and Loki roaming the palace together and just having fun.

The two continued down the winding halls to the prison. The gleaming gold walls turned to stone and the light was dimmer. It had a foul smell and the mood turned solemn.

After a while, Thor said. "We are here." The two stood before a set of massive doors, encrusted with iron.

"Why are there no guards here?" Tony asked Thor.

"Because no one would be willing to die behind those doors to take a prisoner."

Tony looked at him questionably. "Die? What is behind those doors dude?"

"The most horrible creatures you could ever meet. They see into your soul and bring your darkest fears to life. If you make it past them, you gain entrance into the prison."

"What do you mean if I make it past them? I could die?"

"Yes, but I know how to get through." Thor was beaming. He knew something Tony didn't for once."

"Okay then, lead the way big guy." Tony had to trust him, he had to get Loki out in order for him to help Natasha.

Thor grasped the enormous handles and pulled the giant doors open. Even with his god like strength, it was a challenge for him. Once the doors were opened, the two stepped through and the doors immediately slammed shut, trapping them inside.

"Okay Thor, we are now trapped. What do we do?"

"We walk right through."

"What? What do you mean walk right through? You just said that there were horrible creatures in here that could kill us and bring our darkest fears to life!"

"I did say that man of iron, but, what is your darkest fear? Tell me."

Tony thought about it for a minute, then he realized what was going on. His darkest fear is to lose one of his teammates. His teammates are the closest thing he had to family and he loved every single one of them…in their own way of course.

"Don't you see Tony? You are already living your darkest fear, I'm just glad I was right."

"What do you mean _if you were right?"_

"Well, the moment the doors closed, we were still alive and not attacked. So I was right." Thor was smiling so hard because his plan had worked. "The creatures only attack when they sense your fears and then they bring them out. You were already fearful of losing Natasha so there was nothing the creatures could do."

"You took all of this on a gamble!" Tony was furious. "We could have died and no one would have been able to find us. Natasha could have died when we didn't bring help back. How could you have done this?"

Thor looked wise all of a sudden and answered him calmly. "Because the blind see clearer than the seeing. You do not ever know your greatest fear. It is only when you think about it you conjure up what you think is your greatest fear, and the creatures play upon that. This was the only way, and I thought you were living your greatest fear anyways, and I was right."

Tony understood. "But why are you still alive then? What's your greatest fear?"

"I do not know my greatest fear my friend. I am still alive because I have Odinblood within my veins. I am the future ruler of this realm and my father's son. I must have access to all parts of this realm. No creature would dare attack its master."

"I see," Tony said. They started walking through the giant room. It was full of the skeletons and decaying bodies of those who did not make it.

When they got to the other side, they pushed open the door together and were met with a blast of cold, damp air. There were cells along both sides and they were all empty, except for the one on the end. They walked down to it and there he was. Loki. Loki looked up to Thor with a small smile on his face, and then his smile fell when he saw Tony.

"How did he make it through brother?"

"I cannot tell you brother, but we need your help."

Loki looked at them mischievously. "And why would I help you. You threw me in this rotten prison. I'm not really in the helping mood."

This made Tony angry and he reached through the bars and grabbed the raven haired man by his collar. "Because, Loki, my friend will DIE if you do not come with us right now and save her."

Loki's face lit up. "Her? Your adoring lady, ahhhhh what was her name? Pepper? Haha never in a million years would I help you. You are one of the reasons I was put here."

"Not Pepper you bastard, Natasha. I used a Chitauri crystal in one of my damned machines and now she won't wake up and she's trapped in her mind in the past."

Loki's face changed the moment Tony said Natasha's name. "Natasha? What part of the past is she trapped in? Is she okay?"

"Okay? Why do you care?" Tony said. But he answered him after he released Loki's collar. "She's back in her time in Russia, when she was younger in the Red Room. Whatever is happening to her younger self in her mind, is actually happening to her body as she lays on that table back in my lab."

Loki's mind started racing. Red Room, Natasha, that night out in the snow, the flash of red hair, blood, blood everywhere, and that cry of loss. That cry haunts him every time he closes his eyes to sleep at night.

"Earth to Loki? Well, Asgard to Loki, you in there?" Loki had spaced out as he was thrown into a whirlwind of memories.

"I'm here, just, thinking. Is she remembering?"

"What do you mean? That's the whole reason she went back. Well, kinda. She wanted to go back and relive everything so that I could understand her better."

Loki turned furious. "BUT I MADE HER FORGET. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE! SHE CAN'T REMEMBER. It will crush her. She made me promise she would never remember." He said the last part mostly to himself but Thor and Tony still head.

Tony confused, again. "You made her forget? She's never met you until last year, when you tried to kill us all. Right?"

"No, I met her long ago, but I made her forget. She never wanted to remember. So I took her memories. She didn't know who I was up until last year."

"Made her forget what? Tell us dear brother." Thor wanted to know just as bad as Tony. Loki had never mentioned his meeting with Natasha to him before.

"No." But I will help you. I owe her. Loki turned away as Thor opened his cell. That haunting cry echoed in his ears once more and a tear slipped down his face. He wiped it off and turned to walk out of the cell. He was free, but he didn't want to escape Tony and Thor. He had to help Natasha.

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**Sorry it was so short and that I haven't updated in forever. School has been hectic but I'm back now! Tell me what yall want to read. I want some feedback from you guys. Review and let me know!**


	10. RR10 The Doll

"_No." But I will help her. I owe her. Loki turned away as Thor opened his cell. That haunting cry echoed in his ears once more and a tear slipped down his face. He wiped it off and turned to walk out of the cell. He was free, but he didn't want to escape Tony and Thor. He had to help Natasha._

Now that Loki was free, he also had his powers back thanks to Thor. He transported them from the prison and back to the portal where Heimdall was waiting. He needed his strength if he were to go from the prison straight to the Avengers Tower. Loki was unsure of what to do since he was technically a prisoner of Asgard but Heimdall was letting him go with the others. As he passed him, Heimdall gave him a stern stare and simply nodded his head. Loki joined Thor and Tony at the portal and was transported to Midgard, or as the humans called it, Earth.

As the rest of the Avengers waited for their friends and Loki's return, they continued to monitor Natasha's condition. The machine was making her jump through time years instead of days or weeks. Currently, she was about 22 years old and had already added hundreds of lives to her ledger. She killed without mercy and was no longer being brainwashed due to an incident that nearly killed her when she was 16 or so. She had killed world leaders, government officials, and even fellow members of Red Room, under Ivan's orders of course. She did what she was told without question. Steve, Bruce, and Clint all had to watch as Natasha was tortured repeatedly in order for her to be able to withstand any similar situation if captured. Bruce remembered reading about how cruel the Soviet Union was when testing out how low a person's body temperature could get without them dying. He would hear horror stories from it. He never thought in his entire life that he would actually see it; Natasha going through this until she nearly died, only to be brought back and have another test thrust upon her. Over and over again, the boys watched this horror. The horror of a young girl being put through this, and then growing up to be one of the best friends they ever had without knowing what she had been through. No wonder she never talked about it. No wonder she seemed so cold. Bruce thought about how hard his life had been, Clint also, and even Thor. But all of their childhoods put together would never live up to the horrors of Natasha Romanoff.

They boys did not want to watch the monitor another second, but they had to in order to make sure she was okay and her heartrate stayed normal and that her recurring injuries would heal. At one point, she almost had a hole blown through her stomach, but it eventually healed in a few days, with the help of medications and emergency surgery from Bruce as well as Red Room in Natalia's case. Ivan didn't want his precious project to be wasted all in one accident.

Currently, Natalia was on a mission to take out a major political official. He was a major arms dealer and had hustled Ivan out of a deal. He thought with his small army of hired criminals dubbed bodyguards would be enough to protect him from Ivan and his wrath. Little did he know of Ivan's secret little weapon, the Black Widow. So, Ivan sent her and no one else since they would just get in her way. The way she just took orders without a word or any hint of emotion scared the guys. She was almost like a zombie but they guessed that with the hell she went through her whole life taught her to do, and not ask questions. That could lead to a punishment with no mercy.

Natalia arrived at the mansion home of her target. She surveyed her surroundings and noticed many guards about the property. She saw a balcony with an open window on the second story of the home and called that her point of entry. All she had to do was make it there without being seen. She slinked over the iron gates quicker than any normal person would and then darted behind a tree. She noticed a line of trees leading almost straight to the window, starting a few yards to her right. There were three guards in her way to the tree line. She flattened herself to the ground and crawled lightning fast towards the men and took the first one out without a sound. She flipped the second one to the ground after crushing his windpipe and breaking his neck in a headlock. The third guys still hadn't heard anything but turned around to see a beautiful red headed woman standing before him. She smiled at him before fisting her knuckles into his nose, causing it to penetrate his brain. Boom, three dead in a matter of seconds. The rest of the way was easy as she climbed a tree and then went from one to another. She thought of how stupid the guards were to not to look up.

When she reached the balcony, she jumped onto it and rolled silently to the side of the open window, just enough to where she could peek in. She noticed a young girl standing by the bed playing with a doll, probably the targets daughter; she looked about eight or so. Poor girl caught up in all of this, but she was between the window and the door. She formulated a plan of attack and then pounced. The young girl jumped in shock and before she could scream, Natalia had her in a headlock with her dagger to her throat. Just before she added the lethal pressure to the blade, her eyes flicked over to the dresser and saw a lit candle. It reminded her of something. During that hesitation, the little girl squeaked out the word "mommy!" She was terrified and was calling for her mother. For an unknown reason to Natalia, she dropped the little girl and staggered back. The candles flame and the word "mommy" affected her in an emotional way. She knew she wasn't supposed to let anything get to her. She tore her gaze from the candle and looked at the small girl huddled at the foot of her bed, hugging a small doll, terrified of the woman with the flaming red hair.

She needed to finish the mission. She had wasted enough time already. Ivan's words sounded in her head, _leave no witnesses, show no mercy_. He didn't have to know. Natalia then ran past the little girl in search of her father. It didn't take long before she found him in his study. The moment she burst into the room, she saw him press a button that most likely summoned his guards. He ducked behind his desk and Natalia made a beeline towards him. She flipped the heavy desk away with little effort and grabbed the man by the throat. Just before she could snap his neck a bullet tore through her arm. She dropped the coward and faced her attackers, examining them in just one second. In that second, she knew all their weaknesses. She smiled, her arm already healing.

Steve just couldn't believe how strong and calculated she was. She was so much sharper than him, so much faster. It was almost as if the screen was being fast forwarded. He knew these were bad guys, even to him, but the way she killed them was frightening. She loved it. The friend he knew, the woman laying before him, was not like that. He noticed that she tried her best not to take a life during attacks. She only did when necessary. But when it happened, he noticed that pained look of regret and sorrow flick across her eyes for just a moment, before she continued. If not for his own super serum, he may have been to slow to see it. He looked over to Bruce, who was studying Natasha's arm wound. It wasn't healing as fast as Natalia's. But he could just barely see the new skin growth. Bruce started patching it up, as if it were routine to him now. He then looked over to Clint, who was just staring into nothingness. Steve just sighed and watched the monitor again. He wondered when his friends would be back with Loki.

The guards sensed there was something different about this assassin before them. When she smiled, they all knew they would not live, but they had to at least try. The five of them placed their fingers to the triggers and before they knew it, the red head was behind them. She whipped out a dagger from her boot and sliced two of the guard's heel tendons, causing them to drop to the floor in agony. She stepped over them and shoved the dagger into another man's skull, killing him instantly. Another man opened fire on her. She flipped over the spray of bullets, grabbing the gun as she flipped over the man's head. His finger remained on the trigger as the spray of bullets continued to fire from the gun, killing one man as the line of fire arched upward and into the ceiling. The guard's refusal to let the gun go caused his hand to break. Natalia finally had the gun and shot him through the back. Part of the ceiling fell from the gun fire, killing one of the men with the cut tendons on the floor. Natalia easily dodged the falling wreckage. She shot the other guy and when they were all dead, she went back to the target that was cowering behind the desk. He was now trying to escape through the window but Natalia grabbed him by his shirt and pulled him back. He fell to the floor and Natalia placed her boot on his chest and aimed the gun at his head.

"Please!" he begged. "Don't kill me! I'm sorry I crossed Ivan, it was just business!" Natalia was tired of the words. She shot him without further hesitation and dropped the gun to the floor, no longer needing it. In her other hand, she held the dagger. She needed to leave before any more guards came. She then heard a sound behind her. Thinking it was another guard, she turned lightning fast and threw the dagger, hitting its target dead in the chest. Horrified, Natalia ran to the victim, cradling its head as the life slowly drained from the eyes. It was the little girl, terrified from her encounter with Natalia, seeking comfort from her father. Natalia didn't know why, but her death crushed her, and a little chunk of humanity crawled its way back into her heart. She had killed hundreds of people, children included. But this just crushed her. Footsteps sounded in the hallway and Natalia looked down at the little girl in her arms. She took the girls small doll and carefully lowered her to the ground and then fled through the window with the doll in tow.

While in Natalia's mind, Natasha had become one with Natalia. She no longer remembered anything apart from what Natalia knew. She didn't know her friends anymore, or her life in Avengers tower. Natasha was gone; all that was left was Natalia. All of Natasha's memories were in the far corners of her mind, held under lock by the Chitauri crystals that were used in the machine. The crystals were dangerous, unpredictable, and the rest of the Avengers had no clue as to what had happened. Natasha wasn't lying on the table before them, Natalia was. And Natalia was a highly trained assassin ready to kill on a moment's notice.

When Natalia returned back to base, Ivan congratulated her on her kill. Normally she would have been proud to be acknowledged by Ivan but she seemed indifferent. He told her to get some rest and that tomorrow would be the start of another phase of the Black Widow program. She had no idea what it was and she didn't really care.

Natalia returned to her room and placed the small doll under her pillow. She hadn't been there five minutes until a knock sounded on her door. It was Ivan and another man, roughly her age.

"Natalia, I'm sorry for bothering you but I was just too excited to wait and introduce you tomorrow. I've waited far too long for this. Natalia, meet James."

Natalia studied him closely. He resembled her very closely in the way he carried himself. He was standing calm, but poised for attack at any moment. He looked immensely strong also. Not in the muscular way, but in the way she was. The moment she opened the door she saw him study her over the same way she did before any battle. He was just like her, and that scared Natalia a little.

Ivan smiled in the single second of them examining one another. He knew how fast they could do that and it made him giddy; his creations finally meeting for the first time. Though he knew Natalia since she was a small child, he only knew James for a few years, experimenting on him the same way he did with Natalia.

"Natalia," Ivan said, "after tomorrows procedure, you two will be training alongside of each other. He will take over for you when you are no longer able to."

_No longer able to? _she thought. "What do you mean father?" she asked.

Ivan kept his giddy smile. "I can't tell you, or it would compromise the experiment."

Natalia glanced back over to James, who also looked as confused as she did. He hadn't said a word yet.

"Well goodnight, my daughter. Sleep well." Ivan turned with James and they left, with James' one metal arm flashing in the dim light.

Natalia couldn't sleep. She kept wondering what kind of procedure she would endure tomorrow. Would she be getting a metal arm too? She didn't know. To keep her mind off things, she decided to go for a walk. She did this when she had something on her mind. She wasn't supposed to, but she was a master of stealth and had snuck out of the compound dozens of times for a walk in the wintry forest. She hadn't been there in months and she missed it. When she snuck past the last guard and reached the tree line, she let her defenses down. This was the only time she had to relax. She made her way up the river to the waterfall where she spent her free time. It was her secret place. The cold didn't bother her due to her serum and the snow just melted off her due to her higher temperature. When she finally made it to the frozen waterfall, she snuck behind the frozen wall of ice to her secret cave. She layed against the wall and let her mind wander. She hadn't been there long before she heard footsteps.

A shadow appeared behind the massive wall of water. Natalia grabbed a rock from the frozen floor as her weapon. The shadow was closer now, heading straight for the entrance to her cave. A moment later, a raven haired man entered, oblivious to the danger before him. It took a few moments for him to realize that she was there, and when he finally did, he simply rolled his eyes at the red head with the rock.

Natalia was shocked to see his indifference. She wasn't used to people not being afraid of her. And did she just hear him mumble? It sounded like he said "Stupid humans." She was mad he was in her cave, so she wanted him out.

He had to admit, the red head was gorgeous, but a rock as a weapon, really? He rolled his eyes and mumbled "stupid humans." He watched as she raised the rock and threw it at him. He was just going to let it hit him. He knew a human couldn't hurt him. But he was not expecting the force of the impact. The rock hit him with such force that he was carried off his feet and hit the rock wall behind him. He looked at this girl in shock but she had disappeared. As he stood up, out of nowhere, she came running at him from the side and tackled him back to the ground. She straddled his midsection as she threw punches at him. He couldn't believe how strong this girl was, and now he was mad.

Natalia was not prepared for what happened next. With strength similar to her own, she was thrown off of the strange man and landed against the opposite wall. She knocked her forehead against a rock and felt hot blood stream down her face. Before _she_ knew it, the man had his hand wrapped around her neck and her feet lifted off of the ground. He got in her face and asked, "Who are you and why are you so strong?" She smiled her signature smile and brought her feet up and pushed him off of her. He stumbled back but Natalia caught him by his collar and spun him around with his back to the wall. She grabbed him by the neck like he had her and lifted him from the ground.

"My name is Natalia Alianovna Romanova, and you are in my cave."

He watched in astonishment as the gash on her forehead healed in front of his eyes. He smiled and then in a flash of green light, threw her off of him.

The light shot from the man's hands in a flash of green light and knocked Natalia to the ground. She braced herself for another attack but none came. Instead, the man leaned over her with his hand out to help her up and said,

"My name is Loki, let's have a talk."

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**Thank you all for reviewing! Sorry it's taken so long for me to update. I'm back now! I just need new ideas to keep this thing going. Let me know what yall think and what yall want to read! **


	11. RR11 Humanity

RR11

_The light shot from the man's hands in a flash of green light and knocked Natalia to the ground. She braced herself for another attack but none came. Instead, the man leaned over her with his hand out to help her up and said,_

"_My name is Loki, let's have a talk."_

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Bruce and Clint were glad that Steve wasn't in the room when Natalia met the man with Ivan. They were sure it was Buckey and there was no telling how Steve would react. They were going to tell him when he got back but they were interrupted by their fellow team members arriving. Steve was walking into the room just as Natalia snuck out of the compound.

"Tony, what are you wearing?" Clint asked in regards to his outfit to blend in to Asgard.

Tony wasn't listening. He stripped off his suit and made his way over to Natasha to see how she was doing. He saw bandages and cuts littering her body. He then saw in the corner the bloody rags from previous injuries and surgeries. He had missed a lot, but he was determined to watch the footage to get up to date. He touched his hand to a cut on her cheek and then noticed a presence beside him. Loki.

As soon as the trio entered the room, Loki's eyes found Natasha. He was pissed that she was reliving all of this but he was also sad. He watched as Thor went over to Clint, Bruce, and Steve, to catch up on the recent events. He saw the glares coming his way. They still did not trust him. So Loki joined Natasha and Tony. He joined them just as Tony was touching a cut on her cheek. She looked bad. He then surveyed all of the machines and bloodied rags. They were trying to save her, but they were way over their heads. He was pulled from his trance by the archer.

"Hey, Loki, what's the plan?"

In truth, he didn't have one. At least not yet. He didn't have all of the information.

"I need to know what exactly is going on before I dare touch anything. What is this screen?"

Tony spoke up this time. "We see what she sees, thanks to that damned crystal. It also allows us to see her through reflections off of the surrounding surfaces, kind of like an awesome projector. We don't just see through her eyes. We see her just as we see you. See, now she's in the woods."

The color drained from Loki's face when he realized where she was going. He could just see the remnant trace of the portal he used to reach earth that night. She was about to meet him.

"What's with the frown green man?" Clint was really getting on his nerves.

"This is the night we first met." All eyes turned to him in bewilderment, except for Thor and Tony of course who obliviously heard him talk about them in the past when they were breaking him out of Asgard.

"Yeah," Tony said. "He kept mumbling something like _I have to help her, _and, _she made me promise_. Care to elaborate some more?"

"No, I'm sure you will see it eventually through this damned machine. She will have to relive the worst parts of her life, and it's all your fault."

Oww, that hurt. Tony wasn't prepared for that remark.

They all stood back to watch what would happen next on the screen. Tony noticed how grown up she looked, she had lost her baby face and now looked like a grown woman, just like the one that laid on the table in front of them. They watched how Natalia found her cave and Loki following behind a few minutes later. They watched as she picked up the rock and threw it into Loki, causing him to be thrown across the room. Clint and Thor got a laugh out of that one, but then scowled when Loki threw her off of him and across the cavern, making her forehead smash against the stone. They were still not used to watching how quick she healed but enjoyed the astonished look on Loki's face when he witnessed it. When she told him her name, the boys were still not used to it. When Loki introduced himself to her and helped her up, the Avengers realized that he used to have a softer side.

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"My name is Loki, let's have a talk."

"Why are you here?" Natalia asked as Loki helped her up from the cave floor.

"Same as you I presume, to get away. You're strong. Where are you from?" he asked.

"From? I'm from… here. A compound not too far from here."

"But why are you so strong? I've never met a human quite like you. You almost beat me, only my brother ever beat me in a battle."

"Sorry bud, can't tell you. Top secret. What about you? Where are you from and why are you so strong?"

He responded with, "Well, couldn't hurt I guess. I'm from another world, called Asgard. I'm… a God."

Natalia was amazed and intrigued. That explained the flash of green light he shot at her. She wanted to know more. This was the most exciting thing that had ever happened to her.

"So why leave your world for mine?" She asked.

"I just had to get away for a while. I'm kind of a loner I guess you could say." Loki was surprised by how much he was sharing. Talking to her was easy, something he wasn't used to where he was from.

Natalia was also surprised by what all she had to say. She then started to realize that this was the first actual conversation she had with someone apart from Ivan and the others at the compound who only talked when needed. She was actually enjoying herself. An hour later, they were still chatting away as if they had been friends forever.

"So you mean your brother is Thor? Like from the stories?"

"The stories aren't stories dear Natalia. Every story had to of come from somewhere. Thor can be a bit much at times. He is careless and arrogant at times and it feels like I constantly babysit him. And as for mother? I love her but she hovers a great deal. She always know what you are thinking and it gets on my nerves sometimes. I have been coming here for the past month to relax."

"Hmm," she said. "You know this is my cave right?"

Loki smiled at her.

"I don't see your name on it," he said.

She looked around. "No, but I've been here longer, I live around here, and I was born here…On Earth."

Loki started laughing. He laughed for the first time in what felt like forever. He felt so carefree. He then noticed Natalia start to laugh.

They lay on the cavern floor staring at the ceiling sharing eachothers lives. Natalia didn't share all she wanted to, she couldn't. She didn't want him to judge her. But she thought he knew already.

"So what is troubling you tonight my dear? You said you only come here when you need to get away, just as I do."

Natalia frowned. "Just a hard day I guess. So how exactly did you sneak from your kingdom again?"

Loki frowned also at her change of subject. "I will only tell you when you tell me what's wrong."

She sat up before she began. Loki sat up also and faced her. "I had a mission today just like I have any day. I've killed people Loki, lots of people. Even children. But this time, there was a little girl and I don't know why but she affected me somehow. I lost my concentration. Ivan always says to show no mercy, leave no one alive, but I let her go. By the end of it all, I was so caught up in everything and she came looking for her father. All I heard was a little sigh and I turned and before I could stop myself, I threw my dagger and it planted itself into her chest. She died in my arms Loki, and I cried for her. Ivan would hurt me if he knew. I, I don't know if I want to do this anymore. Over the years, I guess I've lost my humanity and killing became normal for me. Tonight though, I felt a little piece creep back."

Loki just listened as she poured her heart out. He didn't judge, or offer her any kind words. And Natalia liked that. She didn't want to be shown pity, she just wanted to talk to someone.

"Then tonight Ivan told me there was another phase to the Black Widow program but I have no idea what it is. He introduced me to this guy with a metal arm. I think he's just like me, or similar or something. But he just looked so dead inside. He's supposed to take over for me when I can't any longer, whatever that means."

"Do you think Ivan is going to kill you?" Loki asked.

"He couldn't do that, he's invested too much into my training. Maybe he's going to chop off my arm and make me a metal one so James will continue Ivan's dirty work while I heal maybe. I don't really know."

They talked until the sun started to rise before they said their goodbyes. They didn't want to, but they didn't want to be found missing. Natalia isn't allowed out of the compound without being on a mission and Loki is forbidden to travel to Midgard.

"Next time you want to meet, just look for a weird light in the sky. It always hangs around a few minutes when the portal comes through." Loki said.

And with that they two parted ways and headed to their respected homes.

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Natalia had only laid down for an hour and a half before she had to get up. She quickly ate breakfast and spent an hour of training before she was to meet Ivan down in the lab. She hardly ever got nervous but she was pretty nervous now. Anything to do with the lab makes her cringe. She hated that place.

When she arrived, she passed James walking out. Their eyes met but no emotions were exchanged. She was going in blind. He grabbed her arm though and said "Ivan wants us training together after you are finished."

What he said was kind of a relief. That meant that she wasn't getting her arm chopped off or anything that required healing. But she still didn't know what was going to happen.

When she walked in, she saw Dr. Andrei by a surgical table pulling things from vials and mixing them. Ivan was there too but said nothing and nodded toward the table. She walked over, almost routine, without protest, and laid down. They didn't even strap her down this time. Dr. Andrei just lifted her shirt some and plunged the needle into her stomach. She didn't flinch, she was trained not to show pain, but man did that shit hurt. The liquid felt like fire but it quickly dissipated. Her vitals were then taken and Ivan then released her. As she walked from the room, she heard Dr. Andrei say to Ivan, "I hope your happy now." She heard Ivan punch him in the gut but she stayed out of it. Instead, she left to find James for training.

Walking down the hallways, she didn't feel any different. She lifted her shirt to see that the needle prick was already healed. She shrugged it off and opened the training room door. She looked up to see the familiar red stain she had put on the ceiling the night she killed her fellow comrades. She couldn't remember which girl it came from, but she knew it was her fault it flew up there during the massacre. In her own little world, she didn't see the glint of metal as it barely connected with her face.

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Thanks guys for the follows and reviews! Let me know what you think! Sorry it's so short, the next will be much longer!


	12. RR12 She's Awake

RR Ch12- She's Awake

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_Walking down the hallways, she didn't feel any different. She lifted her shirt to see that the needle prick was already healed. She shrugged it off and opened the training room door. She looked up to see the familiar red stain she had put on the ceiling the night she killed her fellow comrades. She couldn't remember which girl it came from, but she knew it was her fault it flew up there during the massacre. In her own little world, she didn't see the glint of metal as it barely connected with her face._

While Natalia was napping after her night with Loki, Bruce and Clint caught everyone up on the recent events by replaying all of it, fast forwarding the boring parts. The only part Steve missed was the part when Bucky came in. He would be in for a surprise. They all watched the events that took place by watching what was recorded. Before Bucky appeared, Clint sat Steve down and told him to remain calm and that Natasha didn't have any memory of this, which is why she never told them. This confused Steve, Tony and Thor too.

When Bucky appeared before Natalia outside of her room, Steve stood up from his chair to get a closer look. He saw Bucky and Natalia size each other up. Thor and Tony gasped when they saw him. This was the man who took down S.H.E.I.L.D, and Steve's childhood friend. Steve confirmed it was him. He didn't have his mask on and there was no mistaking him. He just couldn't believe that Natalia had met him. They watched the rest in silence. They were just as confused as Natalia when she was injected with the needle. They had no idea what was in the solution and it scared them a little. It didn't cause her to have any ill effects, yet. Bruce ran more tests on Natasha lying there but there wasn't anything to be found. Whatever it was, it was untraceable. The boys watched as she left the room all confused and return to the training room. Right as she walked in, the boys watched a metal arm fly about a half a centimeter from her face, before she caught it and used the man's weight to her advantage, causing him to hit the ground.

Natalia sensed rather than saw the arm fly past her face. She moved back just enough for it to miss her as she grabbed it and pulled the rest of the body to the floor. She knew it was James. He smiled from the floor and held his hand out for her to help him up. She reached for it and he pulled her to the ground with him, twisting her arm so that she flipped stomach down, and put his boot between her shoulders. Natalia cursed herself for falling for that trick, and quickly thought of a way to escape his grasp. Her arm was pulling tighter and tighter, causing her shoulder to hurt. She was lying flat on her front so she bucked her back leg out and connected with James back. She was very flexible. He stumbled forward, causing him to lose her grip of the red head. He regained his balance and turned to strike her, but she had already gotten up and moved. She jumped onto his back, putting him into a headlock. She was strong, but he was equally strong and skilled. He broke the headlock by running up the wall, and flipping over her head. They fought for at least thirty more minutes before they realized that neither of them had gained the upper hand. They were equals, and had been trained in similar ways. They gave up in frustration. Neither of them had ever lost and it was a first for them. James stormed from the training room and Natalia stayed back for a few more minutes. She didn't know what to think about her new "friend" but she did know she didn't like him. She sat there in her own thoughts for a few more minutes before leaving to go to her room. She was tired and decided to take a nap.

The Avengers all watched as the two fought and were equally frustrated at the outcome. Of course they were a little biased because Natasha was their friend, but she never gained the upper hand, just as Bucky hadn't. Steve had a range of emotions strewn across his face, but he never said anything.

Loki only knew about Bucky from what Natalia had told him. She had always respected him, and he respected her. They never grew to be friends and that was fine with Loki. He was always a bit protective of her when she was with him. They grew to be teammates, but nothing more. He was destructive and even disappeared after a year or so with the Red Room. That must have been when HYDRA took him back.

"Tony," Loki said, "show me the machine and how it connects to her. I need to know everything in order to help. "

Tony nodded and grabbed the blueprints off of a desk and brought it over to the machine. As they talked technical things, Clint, Thor, Bruce, and Steve left to take a break and process everything. Clint wanted to know how the break in went and Bruce wanted to know if they could trust Loki. Steve was just tagging along, still upset at seeing Bucky.

Tony explained how the machine ran and how it hooked up to Natasha. He also showed where the crystal came in. At the heart of the machine, it sat surrounded by an arc reactor similar to his own. It kept it from frying the machine and also pumped its energy into the wires connected to Natasha. He explained how the wires connecting to Natasha, especially the one with the needle in her brain, had a coated core that kept the energy flow constant. He explained that he didn't know what would happen if he just pulled the wires from her. He also explained that he didn't know why he was able to come out of the dream state but she got stuck, and connected. The leftover crystal he had cut from the original to make it fit still sat in the titanium box that he had shown Loki. Loki thanked Odin for Tony not using the whole thing. It could have been disastrous.

"Chitauri crystals are extremely dangerous Tony. I don't even know how you were able to hold one without being affected somehow. Your arc reactor, maybe that's how you came out, and she didn't. I don't know. They are just that unpredictable. The crystals come from an Infinity Stone. It was given to me by Thanos which you already know. Again, sorry for unleashing an alien race on your planet. Well, it bends the wills of others by controlling their hearts. I'm guessing that since Natasha was affected emotionally by reliving some of her past life, the crystal hooked on to that emotion and bent it out of shape. Since the energy is constantly flowing into her, it manifested itself into something different, binding her mind to her childhood self and growing with her. Suddenly breaking that bond could be catastrophic, and could kill her if done improperly. "

Tony listened in silent horror. He knew all of this, but when he said that the crystal manifested itself into something different, he couldn't help but wonder what it would do to her. They had to disconnect her, but he wasn't sure how without killing her. Just as they talked, Natalia jumped a few days. She went on missions with James and trained everyday with him. She even met with Loki a few more times.

Tony didn't have to relay the information to the rest of the team. Their distrust if Loki had them ask JARVIS to keep them connected with the lab. They watched and listened in from the kitchen.

"So what do you suggest in terms of disconnecting her?" Tony asked Loki.

"Let me think for a little while. I want to do this right. But we can't waste any time. We have to do this fast. "

"Why rush? You just said we need to take our time so we don't kill her."

"I know, but think of the psychological effects she could have, having to relive all of that. She may not ever be the same."

Tony silently agreed. But there was more to it that what Loki was saying, he could tell. He let it slide and gave the god some space as he thought of ideas. He left Loki to his thoughts and joined the rest of the team in the kitchen.

All eyes turned to him as he walked in. He saw their concerned faces. "Relax, he won't hurt her. There is more to their story than what he is telling us."

"I know," replied Clint, "and that's what worries me."

They all sat in silence. Bruce was glued to his handheld monitor of Natasha's vitals and the rest just sipped coffee and watched the screen. Natalia was on yet another mission. They seemed to have increased since her injection. She hasn't shown any signs yet of change. Maybe the injection didn't work, whatever it was supposed to do.

Loki sat staring at the machine. He saw how the crystal pulsated within its reactor, along with the one in the box on the table. He thought of a million different ways to disconnect her. Then he had an idea.

He wasn't sure how to summon the others to present his plan, but he gave it a shot. He didn't know they were watching. He said loudly, "Umm, invisible talking machine voice? I need you to summon the others to the lab please." He slightly remembered the Avengers talking to an invisible voice that did things for them. He hoped they still had it or he would look even more stupid than he already felt. He breathed a sigh of relief when he heard, "Yes sir master Loki."

The Avengers raced to the lab when JARVIS called them. "I have an idea on how to disconnect her, but it's a long shot being that this has never happened before."

"Well what is it!" Tony exclaimed as he ran over to where Loki was standing.

"The extra crystal, I think that if we make it into something, say a ring or necklace, and put it on her, we could remove the wires from her…"

This enraged Clint. "Add another crystal!? That's crazy! No, we aren't doing it!"

"Hear me out, I'm not finished." Clint rolled his eyes, still fuming.

"We can't just remove the wires from her. The energy from the crystal in the machine is still within her. But if we add the extra crystal, since it was a part of the same thing, it wouldn't be like totally removing it from her. The constant contact from the ring or necklace would slowly drain the energy from her over time, instead of all at once if we just ripped it from her head."

"It could just work," said Bruce.

Thor agreed and chimed in with "but Tony has to make it, since none of us can touch it. His arc reactor keeps him from absorbing the energy."

"I'll get to work now. It's time to bring her back."

The lab was a flurry of excitement and apprehension. Steve had the idea of making a cuff since it would be harder to accidently come off. Loki also suggested having a lock system on it that regulated the energy flow so that it wouldn't drain into the crystal too fast. Also, when it was safe, the cuff would unlock itself and come off. All these ideas went into the making of the cuff and after an hour or two, it was time.

Tony walked the cuff over to Natasha to put it on, but Thor grabbed his arm. "I think we should put it on and remove the wires at the same time."

"That's actually a really good idea brother," Loki said as he waked over to where the wires connected to Natasha. He placed his hands on the one on her head, and the other on her chest and prepared to pull them. Tony got the cuff ready and looked to Bruce to see if she was stable enough. He nodded, and then Tony counted the moments down.

They all held their breath. "3…2…1." The wires detached as the cuff went on and locked into place. They all stood frozen for a moment before Bruce said, "It worked." Nothing blew up, Natasha didn't die or have any reaction, and everyone started high fiving.

Bruce was all smiles and kept assessing her vitals. "She may not wake up for a little while, but her brain waves are no longer stressed. I think it actually worked!" He could almost feel the beast within him smile also.

Tony grabbed Natasha's hand and leaned down to her ear. "We did it Natasha. You're back!" he whispered excitedly before celebrating with the rest of his team.

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Natalia had just gotten back from another mission and Ivan had summoned her to the lab.

"What now Ivan," she asked annoyed. She was due to meet Loki in an hour or two and she was impatient to get there.

Ivan gave her an angry look and she shut up. She had gotten cocky with him lately but he didn't punish her any.

He never said anything as Dr. Andrei hooked her up to some wires.

"What's all this for?" she asked.

Dr. Andrei was the one who replied. "We just need to put you under and give you a little shock to see how things are going."

"What things? Does this have anything to do with that injection you gave me?" She looked from Dr. Andrei to Ivan, and Ivan just smiled.

Dr. Andrei pulled out a needle and stuck it into her vein. Within moments, she had fallen under into the darkness of sleep.

"_We did it Natasha. You're back!" _

"Who the hell is Natasha?" she thought.


	13. RR13 Painful Awakening

**Just wanted to start by saying THANK YOU to **_**Commandos, rohanyoshi,**_** and**_** amiebeca **_**for giving me a review and all who followed and favorited! I'm sorry the updates haven't been sooner, I lost motivation and then had eye surgery and then had finals. But thanks to those reviews, I've been planning the next few chapters! I'd like any suggestions yall have, I want to try and incorporate them into the story. I think that would be awesome! I can't give many spoilers since my plan is epic, but leave me some reviews and who knows, I may drop a few:) Just saying that there will be a huge shock later on in the story and let's see who can guess it. Regular updates will be coming your way! I'm out of school for the summer and ready to write! Thanks guys!**

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**Chapter 13 – Painful Awakening**

Who the hell is Natasha?" she thought.

She lay there, unable to move or open her eyes but she can hear voices. They were unfamiliar and she tried to remember what had happened. As she listened, she heard only one familiar voice, Loki.

Loki was beyond relieved when the experiment worked. The avengers looked at him with a little more respect and a little less distrust. Thor gave him a slap to the back and pulled him into a hug. He always tried to think of the best with Loki and it always hurt a little when he let him down.

"Well, I'm glad that worked," he said. Clint even gave him a small smile and Tony was looking extremely relieved.

Bruce fretted over her vitals and happily told everyone that she was fine. Steve was also happy but still a little worried about how her demeanor would be since all of that would be fresh in her memory when she tried so hard and even forced to forget most of it. As they celebrated, two new people entered the lab. The moment they walked in, they were shocked at what they saw.

The two girls were not expecting to see what they just did. They opened the door, expecting to see Bruce and Tony hard at work on some new invention, but instead, well, they could barely process it. The famous Captain America had a worried but happy expression on his face as he was bro hugging the deadly archer, Clint, aka Hawkeye. They then noticed a very happy Tony standing over a surgical table with a very beat up, unconscious, and bloodied Natasha, the most deadly of all assassins in their opinion. Then out of nowhere Thor appeared and scooped the two confused women up in a giant hug. Still shocked, they didn't hug back and Thor placed them back on the ground. Their eyes then found the god of mischief standing to their right, out of the way of the Avengers but he scared them. Then out of nowhere, Loki dropped to the floor and started twitching violently, as the rest of the Avengers burst into laughter.

"What!? He destroyed our town in New Mexico! And your city! He tried to kill you Thor! And need I mention the horde of aliens he let in!"

The Avengers were still laughing and celebrating as Thor reassured them and helped Loki back to his feet.

"Darcy," he said. "Put the taser away. We have asked him to come here and help. He is on our side." He gave Loki a look like "you better " as he said this.

"Jane, just give me the word boss, and ill drop this mother fucker again," Darcy said as she wielded the taser for a second shot, this time aimed at Loki's groin area. Being smart, Loki didn't say a word. Thor stepped in front of him and asked Jane and Darcy to speak with him in the hallway so Loki's presence wouldn't upset them. He grabbed his girlfriend's hand and picked up Darcy who still wouldn't move from her position.

"Put me down muscle man! On second thought, hold me longer. It's not every day you get swept off your feet by a sexy muscular god."

Jane gave Darcy a warning look when Thor put her back down.

Thor, happy at seeing the duo, asked what they were doing here.

Jane answered after a long drawn out kiss, and Darcy rolling her eyes at the lovebirds. "We were in town for some research and thought we would stop by. What the hell is going on here?"

Thor explained to them outside of the lab and they were shocked and concerned. They decided to stay for a while since they were done with their project and weren't due to start their next one for a few weeks. They felt bad about what Natasha had gone through and were pissed at Tony. Then they felt bad for him when Thor explained how sorry and upset the whole ordeal was for him. He also had to tell them that him and Tony had broken into the Asgardian prison and busted Loki out, since he had information they didn't on the crystal. Also, he explained to them that they had known each other when Natasha was in Red Room and that they had just found out as well. This didn't wave away their distrust of the god of mischief, but it eased their tension some. He explained everything, the shorter version of course. When Thor thought Darcy wouldn't taser anyone again, he allowed them back into the lab.

Jane walked over to the table Natasha was on while Darcy stuck close to Thor, and away from Loki. Loki kept a respectful distance since he was slightly afraid of the woman that shot him with the thin bolt of lightning. The rest of the boys were sitting on some of the couches that were dragged in a week or so ago, since no one wanted to leave Natasha's side.

Jane looked the red haired assassin over. She had bruises all over as well as some gashes and scars. She saw all the blood that had leaked into the crevices of the chair as well as stuck to the floor and all over the pile of clothes thrown into the corner. She was amazed when Thor told her she could heal faster than anyone when she was in Red Room, but that it had slightly slowed down as she lived her life. She saw that they were healing but slowly. Jane jumped when Darcy appeared next to her, transfixed on being this close to her idol. Darcy had always admired Natasha, but had never had the chance to meet her. She was also slightly scared since the woman could kill her in a gazillion different ways.

"Damn," Darcy said. "She looks like shit. Don't tell her I said that." Jane promised her she wouldn't.

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As Natalia lay there, she simply listened and gathered intel. It's what she was trained to do. She learned names, and relationships. She picked up a voice belonging to someone named Steve, who she head say something about Natasha not knowing who Loki was. Was this part of her mission? No one knew she was meeting with him. She was struck with horror when she came to the conclusion that her cave may have been bugged, and that he was another test somehow. She was quickly putting together what her mission was just from all she heard around her. They were giving her intel without them knowing she could hear them. She heard who she thought was Clint telling everyone not to mention anything about the 'mind thing'. She didn't know what that was.

Natalia figured out that she was supposed to infiltrate the group of 'Avengers' and destroy them. Like usual, any group she had ever been put into ultimately led to her taking them down, as part of the mission. She silently laughed to herself when she figured that she had been infiltrating them for years, and to test her, Red Room gave her another treatment, or "shock" to make her forget everything, and continue to gain their trust, just to take them down and destroy them. Most likely they wanted to see what her injection would make her do? She didn't know. She concluded that they were highly technologically advanced and that Red Room most likely wanted what they had, to gain the upper hand in the world. She then thought of the name they called her, Natasha. It was on her list of aliases so she had to remember to answer to that name. She wasn't Natalia on this mission, she was Natasha. And she had to act like her. From what she heard of the stories they told as she lay there for 3 more hours, she knew she could do this. This was the ultimate mission, one that has lasted years. She could NOT screw this up. She had to act like she knows them all and was their friend. It must have been extremely important for Ivan to make it last this long. It was time to take them down.

No one knew that it was Natalia lying on that table, and Natasha wasn't there to stop her. They were clueless. Natalia was stuck as the dominant mind.

As Natalia lay there, she started to get feeling back into her body. She felt her toes, and then her fingers. She almost wish she hadn't gotten feeling back. Her whole body started to ache. The pain wasn't going away as fast as she was used to. She figured it was the mysterious injection she got. Maybe it slowed down her abilities. She would have to be careful. She tried to move, but that was a huge mistake. What had she been doing before all this to be in this much pain? She gritted her teeth and groaned as she tried sit up and move around. Then she felt hands all over her and without thinking, she reacted. She did not like to be touched.

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The guys as well as Jane and Darcy chatted and swapped stories about Natasha and themselves to pass the time. It was hours before she would wake up and they were happily bored for once. They laughed and ate snacks while Jane lay against Thor, happy to be with him again. Darcy figured out that Loki was afraid of her and told the story of how she had taken down Thor, the god of thunder when he first arrived on Earth. Loki was amazed that a mortal had lightning abilities. He was wide eyed the whole time as the rest of the team sort of snickered; including Thor who knew it was really a taser that had brought the two gods to their knees. But Loki didn't need to know that.

After a while, they heard a small sound from Natasha. They all got up to see if she was okay. Steve, Bruce, Thor, Loki, Clint, Tony, Darcy, and Jane all crowded around her. She was gritting her teeth, obviously in a great deal of pain. The events of the past few weeks had taken its toll on Natasha's body. Broken wrist, arm, ribs, bruises, cuts, stab wounds, gunshot wounds…all healed and healing but not being able to move around and work it out has put her in a great deal of pain, and she was on a morphine drip. Without warning, a loud groan escaped Natasha's lips as she woke up and tried to sit up. Everyone reached for her to lay her back down and Clint let out a yell,

"Don't touch her!" He knew Natasha, and waking up after anything has happened to her, she did not like to be touched. It was a reflex thing she had. Her body takes over and until her mind catches up, she is deadly. Clint had been attacked many a time when trying to resuscitate his partner after a mission gone wrong, or just on the couch where she had fallen asleep.

Before they knew it, she had thrown enough punches and jabs to hit every single one of them, and knock them on their asses. She leaped from the table and backed against the wall, eyes wide and unfocused. This wasn't her reacting to not knowing where she was on the mission, it happened all the time, even in Red Room.

Everyone layed on the floor watching her, afraid to move. Clint, knowing how to deal with her, slowly got up and moved towards her with his body relaxed. When Natasha would tense, Clint would stop, only moving forward when she was more relaxed. After a few seconds, Natalia gained control of herself and studied the group of people before her. She guessed the man trying to calm her to be Clint, her 'partner', the big guy Thor since he would have the booming voice she heard, the two women Darcy and Jane, Darcy being the younger one with the smart mouth, the well-groomed one to be Steve, the guy with the light up chest to be Tony, and that left the dark haired man she guessed to be Bruce. She picked out Loki first. She figured all this out in seconds. Her mind was still as sharp as ever. She then started to feel weird as the pain started to take over once again. The adrenaline rush was gone and the morphine drip had been ripped from her arm when she jumped from the table. She looked down at herself and saw that she had on bloody and ratty clothes, as well as a metal cuff on her wrist. She also noticed the wounds on her body and figured that she had been on a mission gone wrong with them. When she saw the blood from where the IV line was on her arm, that's when her knees started to turn to jelly. She didn't want to pass out and injure herself further from falling so she called to the person closest to her.

"Clint…" she murmured as she started to fall to the ground.

Clint caught her and lowered the red head gently to the ground. "I've got you Tash," he said, all the while thinking it was Natasha who had called out to him from the joy of being woken up from that hell she was in. What he didn't know was that it was just Natalia guessing his name, not wanting herself to be injured again, who called out to him.

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"So umm, what do we do now? Red's unconscious…again." Tony, back to his smart ass ways, was unsure what to do.

Clint looked at her as he responded. "I'll put her in her room. She won't be so freaked out when she wakes up in a familiar place. Plus it's an upgrade from that hard ass medical table. It will feel better." He then looked at their bruised faces. "And you all need to get yourselves looked at."

Not listening to him, they all followed his as he left the lab with Natasha in his arms. They all crowded into the elevator to go to her room. They were all worried about her. When they reached the floor her room was on, they followed the two assassins to her room and watched as Clint gently placed her onto her bed.

Steve, being the neat one asked, "shouldn't we…ummm, you know…change her first?" He was looking at her tattered and bloodied clothes.

"Do you want to be the one to touch her and have her wake up again and take a swing at you?" Clint was being sarcastic but he saw sense in it. "Just wait till she wakes up properly. I don't want her to have a panic attack. Jane, Darcy? Could you help her when she wakes up? I'm sure she's going to be sore as hell and no matter how much she denies it, she needs help."

The girls looked uncomfortable at the thought of helping the assassin that just tried to take their heads off, get cleaned up. But they agreed. As everyone left the room, Tony asked JARVIS to alert Jane and Darcy when Natasha was awake.

The group then left to rest and recuperate, as well as tend to their own wounds.

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**Yayyy! Another chapter done! Give me some ideas guys! If I get motivated enough, ill most likely post another mini chapter either tonight or tomorrow. Thanks again!**


	14. RR14 Too Bad

**Just like promised! Here is a little mini chapter. Thank you to my **_**Guest, , and amiebeca**_** for the reviews! You guys don't understand how happy they make me lol. It feels like my hard work is paying off!**

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Ch 14 – Too Bad

_The girls looked uncomfortable at the thought of helping the assassin that just tried to take their heads off, get cleaned up. But they agreed. As everyone left the room, Tony asked JARVIS to alert Jane and Darcy when Natasha was awake. _

_The group then left to rest and recuperate, as well as tend to their own wounds._

Natalia awoke about two hours later. Just as she was trained, she layed still like she was still sleeping to get a feel of her surroundings. She felt as if she were lying on a bed. The room she was in made her sort of relax and it felt familiar to her. She couldn't hear anyone else in the room so she thought it best to go ahead and open her eyes. She was indeed in a bed and from the looks of it; it seemed as if it were her room. She had to hand it to herself, she was a good decorator. She looked at the pictures she had hanging on her wall as well as the dresser. They were of her 'teammates', and they all looked so happy. She looked at herself in the pictures and couldn't tell that she was trying to blend in. It looked as if she was genuinely having a good time. Damn, Ivan would be proud. The pictures distracted her from the pain, until she had to sneeze. The force of the sneeze made the pain wrack through her body, causing a small scream to escape her lips. She layed there in silent agony for another minute, until she heard a small knock on the door. It took her a moment to find her voice. _Remember Natalia, you are one of them,_ she told herself.

"Come in." she called. The two women from the lab she woke up in entered the room. They looked a little afraid of her. She saw that the younger one had a small cut on her cheekbone, and the other woman had a purple bruise on her temple. _Damn_, she thought. _Did I do that? Way to blend in Natalia. _

With genuine concern, the one she guessed was Jane sat on the side of the bed. "How are you feeling?" Jane asked.

"Sore. What the hell happened to me?" Jane didn't know how to answer the question. She was told not to talk about the subject in case she triggered a memory and a panic attack follow. But she tried.

"Tony's stupid mission to save you. Your body took a toll and will take some time to heal."

_So it was a mission that did this to me. _

"Feels like a building fell on me," she said.

Recalling an earlier story, Darcy told her it wouldn't be the first time.

Natalia had no idea that it wasn't a mission kind of mission, just a mission of Tony wanted to see what happened in her past. She decided to drop the subject and go on with her 'life.'

"I feel like crap,' she mumbled to herself. She still hadn't sat up yet, remembering what happened the last time she did.

Darcy, the ever so sarcastic one chimed in with "well you look like it too."

Natalia shot her a death glare and Darcy tensed up. "But, but we are here to help! Darcy and Jane to the rescue! Yayyy…"

Natalia rolled her eyes and Jane laughed to herself. "I don't need any help. I got this." To prove it she tried sitting up. Once again, she yelped in pain and she felt nauseated from the pain.

Jane grabbed her arm, risking another jab at her face, in order for the fiery red head to steady herself. Jane supported her while Natalia's nausea passed.

Natalia knew she needed help, and as far as she knew, her 'friends' were there for her. She admitted defeat. She wanted desperately to be clean and felt like a hot shower would do her good. But the problem was, she could barely move without passing out again.

With a sigh, she grabbed onto Jane's arm and slowly but carefully swung her legs around so that she was sitting on the side of the bed. Jane looked worried but said, "take your time, you've been through hell and your body is pretty beat up." Darcy appeared on her right side, ready to help her stand up. Natalia gritted her teeth, and attempted to stand. Jane and Darcy held on to her as she found her balance. She didn't feel as painful when standing, and it was a welcome relief. She was exhausted. They walked the short trip to the bathroom and had her lean against the wall while they turned the shower on.

"Do you need help getting in?" Jane asked. Natalia felt as if she could do it so she shook her head no. The two girls left the bathroom and Natalia busied herself with getting undressed. It wasn't that hard being that she only had on a sports bra, tight gym shorts, and her underwear. It was painful, but she got undressed and stepped into the shower. God did that feel good. She let the warm water run over her body as she felt her muscles relax. She wanted to sit down so badly, but she knew she wouldn't be able to get back up. She grabbed a washcloth and started to wash the dried blood and sweat off. She was able then to see the damage to herself. She still had that metal cuff on, she just couldn't get it off and didn't have the energy to try anymore. She noticed bruises littering her body. No wonder Jane and Darcy cringed when they saw her after they came into the room. She also saw new scars and cuts. She noticed a new scar right by her hip, and wondered where that was from. She ran her finger over it and was hit with a flashback.

_She was on a mission to protect a Nigerian scientist and all of a sudden the caravan she was in was fired at. Small rockets launched and rammed into their car, causing them to flip and send their passengers sprawling across the hot sand. Natalia landed hard, knocking the wind out of her. She layed there for a second before looking for the man she was supposed to protect. She saw him, struggling to stand up as a strange man with a mask over his mouth approached him. She jumped up and ran to her charge, standing between him and the man. The strange man didn't even hesitate to pull the trigger on the gun he had aimed at them. The bullet ripped through her right above her hip, and into the man she was protecting. She fell to the ground, as well as the scientist and watched as the strange man turned to leave. It was then she saw the metal arm glint in the desert sunlight._

"James?" she asked herself when she came out of the flashback. Why was he trying to kill her? When did this happen? She shook off the flashback and thought to herself, _bye bye bikinis_.

When she finished bathing, she stepped out, dried off, and found clothes sitting on the sink. She put on the bra and underwear but was having trouble getting her shirt and shorts on. Try as she might, it was just too painful. In truth, the painkillers Bruce injected her with after she passed out had started to wear off. She sighed and called for Jane.

When the bathroom door opened, it was Darcy who poked her head in. "Umm, Jane went downstairs to grab you something to eat. I could help you if you want." Natalia saw the slight fear in her eyes. Was she scared of her? Starting to feel weak and nauseated again, she told her yes. Darcy steadied her as she got the shorts on. Darcy admired the toned but bruised abs and was jealous that she didn't look like that. She was pretty muscular too. "You know," Darcy began, "for someone who was in a coma for weeks, you still look pretty damn good. No homo." "Thanks Darcy," Natalia said as she smiled." She then tried to take a step forward but for some reason her legs didn't feel like working anymore. Darcy caught her and saved her from falling. Natalia stood there hunched over in pain while Darcy held onto her. Damn she hated feeling weak.

While she helped get Natasha dressed, Darcy couldn't help but think back to herself before she met Jane. Of course Natasha had it wayyy worse, living and growing up in the Red Room of course, but Darcy had lived her own hell. She had run away from home after her mother's many boyfriends took advantage of her. She was repeatedly sexually and verbally assaulted since she could remember. When she ran away with her boyfriend, he supported her since she had nothing. But her new found freedom was short lived when Zack started putting her down and using her the same way all those other men did. But she had nowhere to go. She was skinny, but Zack started shaming her body, telling her she was fat, and needed to cover herself up when she went out so she didn't look 'like the whore she was.' She started working out but when she had to skip the gym to nurse a bruised rib or black eye from one of Zach's beatings, she could have sworn she gained weight. When she saw Natalia's fit body, she was temporarily jealous. But that dissipated in a second. She was a different girl than she was a few years ago. She worked her way through college and even ran away from her abusive boyfriend to answer an ad for an internship with Jane Foster. Jane new none of this, she wouldn't have understood.

Darcy let Natasha recover for a few moments before helping her walk to the bed. She noticed Natasha's eyes shut tight the entire way and was surprised the assassin trusted her that much to lead her blind. Maybe she wasn't so bad after all. She was just a human, who had been hurt over the years, just like her.

When Natalia got to the bed, she sat on the side, trying to will the pain away. She hated feeling this weak. She never trusted anyone but from the way Darcy looked at her, she could tell that the young girl had been in some serious shit in her life. She started to actually trust the girl, which was a first. Darcy then fluffed up her pillows for her and helped her lean back against the headboard. It was then that she noticed that someone had changed the sheets, and she was thankful for that. She really didn't feel like lying in her own blood after she had just gotten clean. Darcy, feeling more comfortable around the red head, went to the other side of the bed and sat down, ready to help Natasha in any way. Natalia felt her arm start to feel sore so she raised and extended it to the side to stretch it. It was then that Natalia saw Darcy involuntarily flinch and quickly stand up. This concerned her.

"Who did it," she asked sternly to the dark haired girl.

Darcy looked at her surprised and said "did what? Flinch? I was sitting next to the world's deadliest assassin you know, and you think I won't flinch when I see a fist coming my way? You're cool but I don't want to get punched again." She was good at covering her lies. Then Natasha looked at her in a way no one ever did, with understanding. It was like she knew everything.

"Don't lie to me, I knew that face, I've had that face before." Natasha did in fact guess.

Darcy sat back on the bed and just stared at the wall. So she told her. She didn't know why, but she told her everything. Darcy started crying at the fact she just told someone what all had happened to her. She felt a huge weight lift from her shoulders. She had never confided in anyone like that. Natasha didn't say a word, or touch her, or even reassure her. Darcy didn't want to be pitied, and she was relieved when all Natasha did was listen.

Natalia watched the younger woman break down. She just let her rant it out without doing a thing. She wouldn't have wanted anyone to pity her, so she didn't pity Darcy. She felt as if she could genuinely trust this girl. She was her only friend at the moment. It was too bad that she would have to kill her later. This information could be useful.

Darcy dried her tears and then did something she never thought she would do, she threatened the infamous Black Widow. "Don't you ever tell anyone what I told you, not even Jane, or I'll, what scares assassins?"

Natalia laughed and watched as Darcy jumped when the door to the room opened with Jane coming in carrying food. Natalia didn't realize how hungry she was until she saw the food. Jane carried the soup over to Natasha and wondered why Darcy was sitting so close to Natasha, when she thought her assistant was afraid of her. She shrugged it off and beckoned Darcy to follow her while Natasha relaxed. They would check on her later.

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**Tadaa! I hope yall enjoyed it! Natalia is just trying to be sure that Darcy and Jane trust her since they haven't been a part of the team. Natalia does care about what happened to Darcy, but she feels as if it is information she can use to later destroy her, as well as everyone else. She keeps letting her emotions get in the way, just like they did when she killed the little girl with the doll. Thanks for the suggestion **_**amiebeca**_** about letting Loki or Clint discover her! I've already got it planned but I think it will make you happy ;) And like promised, a little spoiler…the flashbacks will have a major effect on her personality, and they won't just be Natasha flashbacks. And the Natalia ones will have to do with her mysterious injection. I hope you like the flashback in this chapter though! Natasha actually told this story to Steve in Captain America- The Winter Soldier. The quote "**_**bye bye bikinis" **_**was in there too;) I may update tomorrow so let me know what yall would like to see in the next one, or future ones!**


	15. RR15 Training

**Thank you all again for the motivation! And **_**amiebeca **_**and **_** , **_**thanks for the multiple reviews! It means a lot too see yall following this! Yall make me want to update more! And thank you to**_** Claire **_**also! You guys rock! **

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CH 15 – Training

Things were starting to get back to normal. The Avengers didn't notice too much about how Natasha acted when Darcy spoke about her. For one, they knew she would most likely be more guarded and cold. They knew that their friend didn't want to feel vulnerable and helpless, and Natasha was hiding it well. They were happy that she was taking things this well.

Natalia wouldn't let anyone in her room except for Darcy. She didn't want to be weak in front of her 'teammates', and since she couldn't remember them too well, she didn't want to blow her cover. She learned that Darcy didn't know her very well, or at all really so she allowed her to help her recover. Darcy felt happy to be around her, and she suspected nothing out of the ordinary since she had only just met the red head a week ago. Natalia quickly started to gain her strength back. This was greatly helped by the tea Bruce would send her. He had added some kind of concoction to it that helped her heal faster. Natalia was thinking that her own super serum accelerated whatever was in it, causing her to get better and stronger. She was also trying to work out in the small space of her room. She wanted to stay sharp. When Darcy relayed the information back to Bruce, he agreed with her since he gave some to anyone who was injured and that they didn't recover as fast as she was. Natalia had also discovered JARVIS, and she quickly read files and watched video of the team. She learned about how 'Natasha' acted around them, and learned the teams fighting moves so that she could use that against them. She saw that Natasha was always holding back when she was in a fight. Natalia had no idea why, but she knew she was quicker and stronger than that. She also learned about the pasts of the Avengers, and was surprised when she read that Steve was almost as old as she was, and also had his own super serum. Also that Thor was an actual god. She then recalled Loki talking about his brother, whose name was Thor. This concerned her, having to kill Loki's brother. The Red Room came first though. She was also quite surprised when she learned that the level headed Bruce Banner could transform into a giant green monster. She thought to herself to test him out one day. She saw a clip of Natasha fighting him, but Natasha was being slow, and not as quick and agile as she could be. This frustrated Natalia. She didn't use a lot of the skills taught to her in Red Room and she still had no idea why she acted that that. It was almost as if she was afraid to let herself go and lose control. She spent hours upon hours studying the files. She finally knew her team.

When Darcy brought her breakfast and tea that morning, she felt amazing. She told Darcy she was ready to leave her room, so she did. Dressed in comfortable grey sweats and a black tank top, she went to the training area. She started by doing some stretches, stretching out her healed muscles. They gave no protest. The tea and her working out did her body good. She started with a few laps around the gym and then did some push-ups and crunches. She was pleased to find that she could do many, and that her wrist hadn't started hurting. She then went over to the gun range and picked up a beautiful looking handgun. She played with the course settings, setting them to the hardest level, and shot down every single target, right through the bull's eye. Based on the videos she saw, she couldn't do that before and again, made her mad. Why was she holding back when she was drilled to be her best? She ran a few more laps until she started to get tired. Not wanting to push herself anymore, she went back to her room for a shower.

While she was rinsing off, she was hit with another flashback. She was back at the Red Room facility. _She had just finished a training session with James when he kicked her in the stomach, hard. She stumbled over to the wall while holding on to her aching midsection, all the while fighting back the urge to vomit. When she couldn't hold it any longer, she emptied the contents of her stomach on to the floor and then looked up to see Ivan standing over her with a look of concern. He grabbed her by the arm and half dragged her to the lab where Dr. Andrei was waiting. Ivan looked mad. "I'm fine Ivan, I've taken worse hits before," she said. Ivan looked at her and then slapped her across the face. "What have I told you about being always being alert! I saw you, you watched as your knife was knocked from your hands and skid across the floor. You should have been focusing on your opponent! Have I taught you nothing!?" She then received another slap across the face. Before she knew it, she watched as Dr. Andrei slid a machine next to her and then inject her with a needle into the arm. After a few moments, everything went black. _

_When she came to, she saw that the machine was gone and a nurse was there to discharge her. She had no idea what they did to her, and knew it wouldn't be wise to ask questions, or face the wrath of Ivan again. On the way back to her room, she saw James with Ivan in the training room, and Ivan was furious with him. James wouldn't meet his gaze and even though Natalia couldn't hear what Ivan was yelling, she knew it must have been pretty serious. She cursed herself for not paying attention. She hadn't been feeling well and was thrown off of her game. She swore it wouldn't happen again._

Natalia shook her head to clear the images from her mind. She jumped in shock when she discovered that the shower had run cold. She jumped out and dressed quickly for warmth. She always hated the cold.

The boys, as well as Jane and Darcy were all in the common room watching TV and eating popcorn. Darcy was smirking about the thought of Loki in his makeshift cell down in the lab. They didn't know how long it would take for the crystals energy to leave Natasha's body, and they wanted him there just in case something happened. A scuffle then broke out between Tony and Thor. They were arguing about who was going to get voted off of the show Survivor, so they started throwing things at each other. First, it started off as just popcorn. Then, the remote control shattered onto Thor's chest. When Tony put his Iron Man glove on, everyone started making bets. Clint threw a paper weight to Thor to throw at Tony.

"So not fair Legolas!" Tony smirked at the nickname he gave Clint, knowing that he didn't like it. As he smirked, the paperweight came flying at him and he barely caught it as he was thrown off his feet by the force of Thor's throw into the wall. Thor erupted into laughter as well as the rest of the room. It made Tony angry to be laughed at, so he grabbed a nearby knife from the shelf and threw it at Thor, knowing that he would catch it and not be hurt. It was all just fun. He didn't expect it when Thor ducked, and the knife sailed over his head and straight towards Jane. Everyone shut their eyes in horror, expecting the knife to impale the girl, but it didn't happen. Out of nowhere, Natasha had arrived and caught the knife in midair, mere centimeters from Jane's chest. A sigh of relief was heard from around the room, and Thor ran to Jane's side, making sure that she was okay. Natalia gripped the knife and wondered why she even bothered to catch it when Jane would just die later. It felt as if someone else had forced her to save the girl. She flipped the knife around and then threw it into the dartboard hanging across the living room, right into the bull's-eye. She wasn't expecting it when Jane jumped up and hugged her. She allowed it for a second before pushing the girl off. She ignored the shocked faces of the people in the room. "I think Tash won," Clint remarked in regards to the bet. It made her uncomfortable, so she walked out and into the kitchen to make herself a snack. When she made her sandwich, she turned to leave the room and found the faces of Bruce, Steve, Jane, Thor, Tony, and Clint all staring at her in the doorway.

"What," she asked. "Do I have something on my face?"

"Natasha!" they all yelled, running at her and Clint picking her up and swinging her around. They were all so glad to finally see her okay. She looked strong, and they were happy for her. She played the part and laughed with them, silently resisting the crushing embrace they had her in. She wanted nothing more than to smash their faces in. When they dispersed, she hopped onto the counter as they drilled her with questions on how she was feeling, if she had any pain, if she needed a sparring partner. She answered them all with annoyance. "Well she's back to her old self," Tony said picking up on her annoyance. Not a single one though asked her about what she experienced in Red Room when she was stuck in her memories. And as far as she knew, she was just recovering from a mission gone wrong. After talking with them for an hour or two, she decided to head back up to her room. _They were all so nice, _she thought. She almost regretted having to kill them all.

The next few weeks, she trained in the training room. She was now completely healed and back to tip top shape. She annihilated all the sparring robots in her sessions, and was impressed with the technology. She practiced mostly at night, when everyone else was sleeping. She couldn't sleep. Her dreams were filled with memories of her teammates and it was starting to changer her feelings towards them. She couldn't let that happen. She was going to have to act fast. She was also having more flashbacks. She felt as if she hadn't lived them yet though. It was as if she was having someone else's flashbacks, but they felt so real. It was like the past and present were fighting with each other, while in the past. It gave her a headache just thinking about it.

While Darcy hung out with her one day in her room, she got up once again to throw up. She had gotten food poisoning and Natalia was caring for her. Sort of like a debt. As she listened in on the sick girl, she was thrown into another flashback.

_She was meeting at the cave again with Loki. They enjoyed each other's company and it was a welcome reprieve from their lives. They had met every night for the past week, and Natalia had been sick. She had been throwing up almost every day. "We do not have this 'food poisoning' on Asgard. I am sorry you have to experience this." Natalia was sitting near the entrance, trying to get some fresh air to settle her stomach. She was pissed that Ivan had pulled her from any more missions for a while. All because she just HAD to lose her focus and get kicked in the stomach. And now this? She wanted to punch something, mostly James. "I just don't get it," she said. "I hate just sitting here when I can be punching something, or on a mission, or punching something on a mission." Loki just held her and let her talk her frustrations out. He wasn't used to the mood swings of women, but he cared for her._

When Darcy came back, she fluffed up the pillows for her and Darcy lay down. She fell fast asleep but the flashback made Natalia restless. To distract herself, she decided to go to the training room again. This time, Bruce was there, taking his frustrations out on a punching bag.

"Hey B, you okay?" she asked. He looked at her and stopped his attack on the punching bag. "I'm fine Nat." She hated when anyone called her that. She didn't believe him. "If you are so fine then why do you not look fine?" She tried to act comforting towards him. In reality, she wanted him to change. She wanted to take her own frustrations out and who better to do it with than the Hulk she had seen so much about. She offered him comforting words and concocted a plan. She saw a bench behind her with an array of knives on the seat. What would he do if he 'hurt' her? She smiled to herself and put her plan in action, she knew just what would set him off and make it look like an accident. She had even researched it, and predicted that titanium mixed with tungsten could pierce his skin. No one else knew this, not even him. She just hoped she was right. The knife she had made for it was kept in her boot. Not just for him, but she felt better always having a knife on her.

"Are you sure you are okay?" she asked him. Raising his voice, he yelled at her. "I said I'm fine Natasha!" Acting like he scared her, she visibly jumped and put her hand up in a warding off position. He looked at her in horror and felt bad about scaring her. "Hey, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it," he said as he took a step towards her with his arm out to touch her comfortingly. Still faking being afraid, she took another step back as he stepped forward and 'tripped' over the bench. She 'tried' to catch herself, 'accidentally' cutting her arm open on one of the knives. As she lay on the ground bleeding, Bruce muttered "Oh my god!" and jumped over the felled bench to see if she was okay. "Don't touch me!" she screamed as she looked at him in 'fear' as he grabbed her injured arm. "I'm so sorry Nat, I, I didn't mean to! It was an accident!" In his horror, he started to lose control of himself. Natalia smiled as he started to turn green. She watched in amazement as his clothes started to tear, green muscles growing from the man's body. With a roar, the Hulk beat his chest and looked at Natalia with hatred in his eyes. In return, Natalia looked at him in excitement. This was going to be fun.

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**So action didn't make it quite yet, but oh it's about to. Let's see how well Natalia can handle the Hulk. Is she over her head? Let me know what you guys think! Also, did ya pick up that Natasha is somewhat starting to come through;) But not yet.**


	16. RR16 Fury and Fear

**Thank you all for reviewing and following! See, these reviews help a lot! I may be updating almost every day. We will see! Thanks! Here is a nice, long chapter**

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Ch 16 – Fury and Fear

The Hulk stood over her with rage in his eyes. She was ready for this. She had no doubt she could take him down. The Hulk started to reach for her. She rolled away into a standing position and prepared to lunge at the monster. She ran at him and at the same time, the Hulk ran to her while roaring at the top of his voice. Deciding on not striking him in that moment since he was faster and had more momentum, she slid between his legs, gaining speed when she slid through her pile of blood that had pooled on the floor from her arm when she had 'tripped'. She hadn't meant to cut herself that deep. The Hulk spun around and when he saw the blood again, it angered him greatly. With the wall to her back, she debated on what to do next. She barely had time to think when the Hulk leaped at her again, slinging a rack of weights out of his way as he did so. They smashed into the wall inches from her head, but left her unfazed. Right when the beast reached her, she lunged forward and ran up his front, flipping onto his back and grabbing his large neck in one of her deadly chokeholds. Expecting to hear him gasping for breath, she instead heard a deep growl as he struggled, falling into things. It hadn't fazed him. Punches and kicks obviously wouldn't work. He simply reached up with his massive hand and flung her off of his back like she was a pestering fly. She hit the wall again, knocking the breath from her lungs. While trying to get her breath back, the Hulk smashed through everything in his path, demolishing it without spending any energy. She hadn't quite gotten her breath back when the Hulk reached her. He grabbed her by the neck, desperately wanting to crush her windpipe. He was holding back. Either that or Bruce was. Natalia tried to look afraid just in case. As the breath drained from her lungs, she remembered the knife in her boot. With one hand trying to pry his off of her neck, she used the other to reach down and grab the hilt. With lightning fast speed, she drew the knife over the beasts arm in an attempt to make him let go; it didn't work. Not even a scratch. That's when she started to feel afraid and over her head. That had to be why in the videos she held back, she was saving her strength to run and stay out of his grasp. He couldn't be hurt. He roared again in her face in anger and threw her again. This time, she landed upon the gun rack, and she quickly grabbed one while sucking the sweet oxygen back into her body. She unloaded the clip into the monster, hitting every pressure point visible to her with the bullets and again, they had no effect. At this point, she had started feeling dizzy. The blood loss as well as her oxygen deprived body made her want to pass out, but she had to hang on and keep trying. She was now fighting for her life. She watched in horror as the Hulk grabbed her by her ankle, and started to drag her around. She summoned up some of her energy and leaned forward, trying to cut his Achilles tendon with the knife. He just had to have a weak spot. But he didn't, and the Hulk dropped her and then kicked her into another wall. She was starting to lose her grip on the world. Her cut arm had ripped open even more somewhere in the fight and was bleeding heavily. Just as the Hulk was about to finish her off, she saw the door to the training room slide open and her fellow teammates pour in.

Steve and Clint were in the kitchen as Steve was making lunch. Thor just walked in with Darcy and Jane following. "What smells so good my friends?" he had asked. Clint rolled his eyes. Thor was always hungry. "Cap is making Spaghetti, one of his famous recipes," he replied. They seated themselves around the counter and watched Steve work. Steve was an amazing cook. Tony then walked in, drawn from his lab by the smells of the marinara sauce. "Hmmmm smells like heaven in here," he exclaimed as he took as seat on the other side of Clint. Steve then turned around and saw a multitude of faces watching him. He laughed to himself, glad he could help out. Darcy then noticed something in the oven and jumped up to investigate. Upon closer inspection, she saw that it was cookies. "Cookies!" she yelled as she sat on the floor to watch them bake. As they chatted, Darcy felt the floor rumble. "Did you guys feel that?" she asked the gang. Looking at her questionly, they all said "no." She then layed on the floor and everyone looked at her like she was crazy. The floor rumbled again, and she jumped up in surprise. "There it is again! Either we are having an earthquake, or something weird is going on." Tony looked at her in concern and said, "Darcy, when was the last time you slept? You've been pretty sick." She was hurt no one believed her. "Okay people, on the floor, now!" she yelled. Not willing to face the wrath of a very pissed off Darcy, they all got on the floor. It was actually quite funny and Tony was giggling to himself. They all pressed their ears to the floor. After a few moments of nothing happening, Clint popped up exclaiming that this was ridiculous. Then out of nowhere, they felt the floor rumble and also heard a deafening roar resonate through the building. Clint even heard it. "Guys," he said, "where is Bruce?" Tony then popped up with the rest of them. "Umm, well, Loki kind of pissed him off and I made him go to the training room to cool off. Also, where is Natasha?" The group looked to each other in fear knowing that she spent most of her time in there. They then took off together. Thor stopped Darcy and Jane, making them go to the lab where it was safest. They agreed and then took off in the opposite direction. Upon arriving to the training room, they heard a lot of commotion inside. They opened the door, not knowing what to expect. As the door slid open, they saw all of the destruction and blood as well as Natasha laying on the floor against the wall on the opposite side of the room, obviously hurt and frozen in fear. They then saw that the Hulk suddenly roared and leaped in the air towards her with his fists raised. They knew Nat would not make it through the impact, even though she was wielding a knife in front of her. They yelled in unison for the Hulk to stop. "Bruce nooooo!"

Natalia had summoned up just enough energy to prepare to roll away when she saw the beast leap through the air. She then saw that her teammates had finally gotten there and she froze. They yelled for the Hulk to stop when he was in midair, ready to kill her. She saw the ripple of human skin pass through him. He was changing back to Bruce, brought back by the worry and horror in the voices of his friends. Natasha saw this, knowing that no one else would and smiled to herself. She knew that it would be Bruce to land on her, not the Hulk, so she wielded her knife, ready for it to plunge into the flesh of Bruce Banner. That would be one down. Just before impact, it was Bruce again. The knife slid through his chest like butter, and then he collapsed on top of her. With satisfaction, she allowed herself to be taken into the darkness of unconsciousness.

To their horror, the Hulk turned back into Bruce right before he landed on Natasha. He had never changed that fast before. They stood there in shock, but were quickly brought of it when they saw that neither of their friends was moving, and that a puddle of blood was growing. It was then that they remembered the knife. They ran over to them and pulled Bruce off of Natasha. They then saw the knife protruding from Bruce's chest, and a large gash on Natasha's arm. Her arm would explain all of the blood, and she looked pretty beat up. What made Bruce Hulk out? They didn't have time to investigate as Steve discovered that they were both still breathing.

"He's still breathing!" Steve yelled.

Coming out of his shock, Tony yelled "Call an ambulance! He needs help now! Don't touch the knife; we don't know if it's saving him right now or not. Grab Natasha and bring her to my lab. I don't want them together right now until we find out what happened to make Bruce Hulk out."

Clint called the ambulance and they were there in minutes. While Thor and Steve waited with Bruce for them to arrive, Clint grabbed Natasha and Tony put pressure on her bleeding arm. They brought her down to the lab and set her on the all familiar surgical table. Jane and Darcy ran over to them while Loki was asking what happened. Clint was the one who replied while Tony cleaned and started to stich up Natasha's arm. "Bruce hulked out and attacked Natasha. We don't know why. We will watch the video when Steve and Thor get back. He changed back just seconds before he killed her, but she had a knife to protect herself, and Bruce landed on it. He's hurt pretty bad. The group tended to her and when they were finished, Steve and Thor arrived to the lab. "How is he?" asked Jane. Steve looked at her sadly but replied with "He's hurt pretty bad. They said it was a good call to keep the knife in. They wouldn't tell me if he would be okay though. They didn't even answer me when I asked. He may not make it guys." The group looked worried. Loki's face was a mask, but he offered some advice. "Don't tell Natasha. We don't know what she would do if she found out that Bruce may die because of her."

_Natalia was looking at herself in the mirror one morning. She was poking her stomach and was upset that she had gained weight. She was pissed that Ivan restricted her workout and training sessions. How the hell was she supposed to stay fit?! She knew she was being punished. Punishments were nothing new to her, but this one made her angrier. She would rather the torture rather than them not allowing her to do anything. She sighed and spun away from the mirror. The spinning made her extremely dizzy and she barely made it to the bathroom to throw up. She felt better after she did. She then prepared herself for another boring day. It had been a few months since she was restricted from training and going on missions, and not doing anything was taking its toll on her. Ever since she could remember, she worked out and trained every single day of her life. This difference was making her feel weird, and weak. She was always mad and kept taking her anger out on Loki when they met. Nothing could stop her from sneaking out. She layed in bed for the rest of the day and then snuck out as soon as she saw the sky glow. She took off though the compound and through the hole in the fence. She took off through the freezing woods until she made it to the cave. Loki was there, with a fire made. Natalia had come to respect the fire but never sat too close or stared at it. She hated fire. Loki offered her his seat and he sat next to her. Natalia vented her frustrations to him and he listened. He enjoyed her company. After a few hours of just talking, she got up to leave. She got dizzy again when she spun around and Loki caught her around her middle. He looked at her in surprise as his hand lingered on her for a few moment too many. She pulled from his embrace and asked, "what?" He was shocked at something. He was stupid for not considering it before. "Natalia? Are you…"_

_She woke up to voices._

"I hurt Bruce?" They all looked down in shock at Natasha who had just awoken. Of course Natalia was faking her sorrow. She made tears come to her eyes. She was also remembering her flashback or whatever it was. The team just looked at her with concern on their faces. "Nat, what happened in there?" Darcy asked her. She looked at her 'friend' with concern etched across her features. She tried to respond and make it seem as if it was Bruce's fault. "I...I don't…" She started tearing up to make it more dramatic. She had forgotten that Loki was there but he piped up with, "pull up the video, she doesn't want to talk about obviously." Natalia looked at him thankfully and turned to look back at her teammates.

This action sent Loki thinking. Not once in the past few years had Natasha ever looked at him with thankfulness. She hated his guts for all he knew. Maybe since she had started remembering him when she was trapped in her memories brought some of that emotion back? He didn't know. He had tried to kill her and her entire team as well as the world not too long ago. This stuck him as odd. He then watched as Tony had JARVIS pull up the video footage of the training room.

The team watched as Bruce was beating on the punching bag, murmuring to himself angrily. They then saw as Natasha entered, dressed in her workout clothes, obviously there to train. When she approached Banner, they heard the audio of her trying to calm down the frustrated scientist. He then yelled at her, causing her to flinch and retreat a step back. The team chalked it up to a combination of being scared of him transforming, and her jumpiness from experiencing Red Room again. When he stepped towards her to apologize, she stepped back again, still afraid of him. They watched as she tripped over the bench behind her as saw blood flow from her arm, she had been cut. They didn't watch in as much detail as Loki though, and he saw how she had purposely pushed a knife hilt under her back and run her arm along it. He was then pushed back to his earlier suspicions. It really did look like an accident though. The team then watched as Bruce jumped over the bench, and they admitted that this would scare them too if a man who could turn into the Hulk jumped over them. Then to their horror, they saw how Natasha screamed for him not to touch her as he suddenly gripped her arm. Then he lost control. They watched the fight and pitied her as she attempted to cut him with her knife and shoot him. They had to admit though that her reflexes were lightning fast, and she was a quick thinker. She was definably on top of her game, but she was not match for the Hulk, no one was. At the end, they saw how Natasha had impaled her friend, and the look of horror cross her face right before the passed out. Loki though, saw the glitter in her eye. Something was not right here.

Over the next few days, Natalia had healed but Bruce was in a coma. They were still unsure if he were to live or not. Loki also convinced the Avengers to let him out of his cell. Someone from the team had to always be with him though as he roamed the building and hung out with the team. He risked the ridicule from everyone as he tried to talk to Natasha. As the team was on a mission one day, he saw his chance. Jane and Darcy were with him and he had on a cuff that would electrocute him if he tried anything, and Darcy had the button. They were all in the living room watching a movie on the strange picture box when Natasha came in. He really just wanted to chat.

"Hello Natasha," he said to her as she sat down. She smiled at him and offered a hello back. "How are you feeling? Do you remember me from your memory trip?" He watched as her face fell.

How could he know that she was having flashbacks and remembering things through the brainwash? She had no idea but decided to be truthful since he knew anyways. It couldn't hurt since it was just Jane and Darcy there.

"Yes I remember you jackass. Haha I miss our meeting in the cave." This intrigued Jane and Darcy. They hadn't watched the footage but had heard a lot about what had happened.

"Ooooooh, so you two were love birds hmmm?" Darcy teased. Natalia laughed at her and threw a pillow at her. She caught it and continued to smirk. They talked for about an hour about various things from the past and since Loki was there to see where she left off in her memories, he took it further and asked questions only the real Natalia would know. She was answering them with ease and he was smirking to himself at finding out. He could use this to his advantage along to the road to break away from the watchful eyes of the team, with her by his side. He wasn't sure about how much she knew, so he asked a dangerous question to see if his spell to make her forget was still intact. "Do you remember that one time in 1953, when you saw all of that blood in the snow?" He looked at her not knowing what to expect. Instead of being shocked, she looked confused.

_1953? Wait, what year is this? It was supposed to be 1953 now? How could I not have looked at dates when watching the videos? No wonder all the scenery and technology was weird. Am I in the future? _All of these thoughts and many more ran across her mind. _Am I really having flashbacks? Did those things really happen? What the hell is going on?_ She tried to play it off by asking, "Haha exactly how long was I in that coma? Did the year change or something?"

Thinking that she was joking, Darcy responded with, "Nope! Still boring ole 2014! So, what happed in 1953?"

The color drained from Natalia's face and she got up to race to her room. She had JARVIS bring up video footage and she checked the dates this time. She was indeed in the future. But somehow she knew that since she made the connection that Steve was as old as she was. How could she make that connection? She tried pulling up information in the Red Room but saw that there wasn't any, just big fat red letters across the screen that said _Red Room wiped out by agent Natasha Romanoff. _What the hell? She was so confused. How could it not exist! She tried to dive further but she couldn't get past the firewalls. It was almost as if she had set them, and then forgotten how to get through them. _So Red Room doesn't exist anymore? How did I get here? Am I still supposed to take down the Avengers? She had to guess yes. Maybe parts of the Red Room were still out there and she was a part of it. That had to be it. _She still kept her original plan of taking down the famous Avengers. She was starting to have a panic attack. She fell to the floor and was thrust into an array of flashbacks.

_She flashed back to the Battle of New York. She relived the events of the Chitauri invasion brought about by Loki and watched as she drove the scepter into the machine, partially saving them all. Why was Loki evil?_

_She flashed back to Budapest. She was on a mission with Clint and things started to get heated between them. She was feeling emotions she had never felt before_

_She flashed back to various events of what looked like her saving an organization called SHIELD from a group called HYDRA, and James was there as well. He was the bad guy. Why wasn't she fighting with her partner? Was it part of the plan?_

_She flashed back to moments with each of the Avengers, with feelings of love and trust mixed in there. Her, filling pop tarts with toothpaste with Clint to drive Thor mad, and him actually like it. Her, with Tony, playing pranks on him and then helping him work on some machine. Her, with Steve kissing on an escalator while they ran for their lives from HYDRA. Her, with all of them hanging out. The feelings she felt, she actually…welcomed it. _

_She the flashbacked to moments with James, taking down armed men during a raiding mission, and laughing as she snapped necks. Her, with James training. Her, with Ivan being tortured again. Her, destroying the electrocution machine that takes her memories, and killing Dr. Andrei._

She came out of it and laid on the floor for several more minutes before going to the shower to think. She was still loyal to Red Room. This was all a test. It had to be. Maybe it was the cuff she was wearing that was making her see and feel like this, but like always, she couldn't get it off of her wrist. While in the shower, she spaced out again, to 1953.

_She flashed back to her and Loki in the cave, worry and concern splashed across his face as she was doubled over in immense pain. She saw herself look to the back of the cave where all of her stuff was. Why was all of her stuff there? Had she finally ran away from Red Room? She saw herself, lying in the snow, with her own blood everywhere. How could all of that come from her? It couldn't have been anyone else's since she was the only one there, and then Loki was there after she saw a bright light, with fury and fear in his eyes. He lifted her bloodstained body from the ground and ran with her through the forest as she heard gunfire erupt behind them. They ran and ran, she felt like it was from the compound. Their bodies came to a halt and when she looked up, she saw Ivan standing before them, malice dripping from his lips. "Where is it!" he demanded._

She came out of it crying. Why was she crying? What she didn't know was that Loki was slowly bringing her out of her mind block. He had to do it carefully, in order for her mind to not be damaged. He needed her strong and to trust him. He owed her that.

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**Damn that was long. We are finally getting somewhere now! I know it seems like the end of the story but trust me, it's not. There is a lot more coming! Let me know what you think! Thanks guys!**


	17. RR17 Natalia

Ch 17 - Natalia

Natalia woke up the next day pissed. She had gotten so many flashbacks lately that didn't make sense. She started assuming they were being jogged by triggers, and that parts of Red Room were sending them. She started feeling like they were wanting her to leave, and find them again. The team knew she was the Black Widow as well as the rest of the world. She was a legend. She thought that they thought she had destroyed Red Room, hence the locked file. She had to get out of there soon. But first, she wanted to find James. She needed to know what was going on. From the video feeds that she had seen, he still had the red star on his arm, which meant he was still a part of HYDRA. Red Room and HYDRA did a lot of business together, and they were the ones who sent James to them in the first place to see how the super soldier serum affected them.

"_How the hell am I going to find him? From what I can tell, no one has seen him in months. SHIELD won't give us anything. They want the focus closer to home and since James hasn't been a threat lately, the focus has been pulled away from finding him. They know he is HYDRA, and since I'm undercover as well, maybe that is why we were fighting him when he tried to take down SHIELD. I'm still pissed that he shot me though."_

She laid in bed and tried thinking some more. She had to get to an actual SHIELD base to start her search. They had files that she couldn't look into from Avengers Tower. She didn't know where any bases were. She did remember Darcy though, talking with Jane about a mobile base with a small team who had gained a lot of attention lately. If Darcy knew about it, maybe she could find it with her help. She felt slightly better, but was still pissed off. Loki was getting on her nerves lately, Bruce just wouldn't die already, Clint was getting too clingy, Steve was, well, Steve, the perfect gentleman, and Tony, he was a jackass. She couldn't wait to get out of there.

After getting a shower, she headed to the training room to blow off some steam. She almost wished the Hulk was there, just to give her a challenge. She missed having living beings to beat up. Robots just weren't satisfying enough. She even wished James was there, even though neither of them ever won, it was still nice to give it everything she had and work out her muscles. Targets went out way too quick on missions to have any fun.

When she got to the training room, she saw how clean it was. All the broken equipment was gone and the floor clear from her blood. Even the wall was fixed where the Hulk had thrown the weights at them. She also saw that she wasn't alone. Steve was there cleaning his shield. It looked like he had just finished a workout since he was all sweaty. His white shirt clung to him and she couldn't help but admire his muscles. He noticed her as soon as she entered and called her over to him.

"Hey Nat, how are you feeling?" He asked her this with sincerity, but it just annoyed her. They all treated her like she was weak. If only they knew what she was capable of. They would treat her with more respect then.

"I'm fine Steve," she replied with a sigh in her voice as she walked over to him. She sat next to him on the bench and dropped her bag to the floor. She started twisting her back muscles to stretch them out before she started her work out. Steve kept cleaning is shield, and she notice how uncomfortable the silence was to him.

"So, Bruce…"

"I don't want to talk about Bruce, Steve. I came here to work out to forget about Bruce, and everything else for that matter. I don't need pity from you, the rest of the team have already piled it on. I don't need to be pitied!"

"Whoa, Natasha I didn't mean it like that. I'm just worried about you. I don't pity you, I just, I'm worried I guess." He looked at her and saw that she was barely even paying attention to him. He saw how her knuckles were gripping the bench. She was frustrated.

"How about a spar then, I'll even go easy on you, after everything you have been through." He offered her a smile, she offered him a glare.

She was pissed off again. What had she JUST said? She didn't need to be pitied. And for him to say he would go easy on her? She wanted to deck him right there. So, she stood up and walked to the middle of the room and turned to him still on the bench, waiting for him to join her.

Steve realized his mistake the moment he said it. He was so stupid. He sat there as she popped up from the bench and stalk over to the center of the room to spar. He would still try and go easy on her though. He didn't know how healed she was.

The two circled each other. Natalia and Steve were the only two souls in that room. Steve was there with a friend, and Natalia was there with an enemy. They both had the super soldier serum in their bodies, but only one had the more diluted version.

Steve heard the air conditioning kick on and was momentarily distracted. Natalia used that to her advantage. Steve hadn't moved, but his mind tuned in to the sound. Natalia had been drilled over and over to ignore things like that. In his distraction, Natalia raced towards him. He tensed his body to brace for the impact, having been distracted, but this was what Natalia wanted. Instead of hitting him, she dropped to the floor on her knees and slid passed his left leg, grabbing it as she went, and smiling in satisfaction as he hit the floor. Thinking that she would stand up to help him up, he didn't prepare himself for the next attack. He was used to sparring with Natasha, not Natalia, and Natalia was the total opposite. After he fell, she jumped onto his back, straddling him while she put him in a headlock. This caught Steve by surprise and he fought against it.

"_Okay," _he thought. "_No going easy."_

He got out of the headlock and threw her to the ground by her arm. He wrenched her arm behind her back and placed a foot in the middle of her back while she lay on the floor. He didn't anticipate her strength and was surprised as she twisted her body around, and used his arm to pull herself up, and flip over his head. When she landed, she kicked him in his back and he was left sprawled on the ground.

Something isn't right here. She is never this rough. Have I pissed her off that much? He looked at her, and for the first time, he noticed something was off. Her stance was different, and she had a look in her eyes he hadn't noticed before. He didn't think about it for too long since she was running at him again. He popped up and started blocking punches. She was a lot faster than normal. He could usually block a majority of her punches, but these were coming way too fast. He was getting jabbed all over the place. His body was beginning to feel like jelly. He then dropped to the floor. Then he realized what had just happened.

Natalia was having fun. He was a challenge, but she quickly realized she was stronger and that her serum infused body was much stronger than his. She was going to take him out. She started jabbing at his pressure points. He would soon feel weak and be unable to move for a little bit. She wouldn't kill him then, she wanted to have some fun first. It wasn't every day you got to kill Captain America. He blocked some of her jabs, but she eventually hit them all. She smiled as he hit the floor.

"Tash what the hell! We are just sparring! I'm sorry okay?" He couldn't move. His eyes could only follow her as she circled him once. When she was standing before him again, she slowly withdrew a knife that was tucked into her belt behind her. He then started to get feeling back into his body, and he started to get scared. This wasn't like her. As she stood there waiting for him to get feeling back and get up, his mind wandered back to the small things. He remembered how she waited for another team member to do something before following, like she had forgotten how to do something. He remembered watching with amusement as she looked all over the kitchen for a fork shortly after recovering from the memory trip, even though she had been in that kitchen hundreds of times before. He remembered the confusion on her face when the team told stories of their adventures, like she had no idea what they were talking about. He froze when he remembered her seeing Loki for the first time after walking up and her not reacting. Sure, she had known him in her memory, but she showed none of her hate for him that she had when he tried taking over New York during the Chitauri invasion. This wasn't Natasha.

"Come on Steve, get up all ready, I'm getting bored."

"I'm trying Natalia, you did just hit all my pressure points."

"Yeah, not sorry about that." She smirked when he used her name. He finally figured it out. She was testing the tip of her knife with her finger, smiling when it cut her skin.

Steve was still shocked when she didn't flip out for using her old name. He watched as she licked the blood of her finger and then look him in the eyes. Now afraid, he tried standing and found that he could. He got to his feet, though he was still wobbly.

"Natalia?"

"Yes Steve, now get up."

"But…" Before he could finish, she lunged at him and swiped her knife across his chest. He felt the blood soak into his shirt, turning it into a patriotic red over white. Summoning his strength, he dodged the next swipe, and grabbed onto her arm, twisting her into his embrace with her arm holding the knife outstretched. He squeezed her wrist painfully, causing her to drop the knife.

"You knew Bruce was turning back didn't you. You wanted to kill him didn't you?"

He then pushed her away from him, anticipating her to stumble. She caught herself though and took another knife from her belt and threw it at Steve. The blade implanted itself into his right leg.

"Yeah," was all she answered.

He faked holding onto his wounded leg and instead pulled the blade out and threw it at Natalia. She caught it between her hands and threw it back at him, hitting him this time in his arm.

"_Damn, no more knives_," he thought. He pulled the blade out again and this time tossed it over his shoulder. He ran at her, this time surprising her and he kicked her in the stomach. She fell to the floor and he then grabbed her arms behind her back to restrain her, face down. She kicked her leg back and caught him on the side of his face. He stumbled to the side and she got up, clearly looking pissed at having been caught off guard.

She watched as he frowned. She decided to kick it up a notch. Using all of her speed, she darted around him and wrenched his arm behind his back this time, and twisted it at a painful angle. She then snaked her leg around his and pulled it back, taking him down. Once on the floor, he rolled on top of her, knocking the breath from her lungs. To get free, she pulled harder on his arm, and heard a satisfying crack. She let go and he rolled off and stood. He popped his shoulder back into place and then ran at her. She just wouldn't stop. They both started throwing punches and kicks as they tried hand to hand combat. Steve took the worst of it, and was quickly tiring. She hit him again, hearing a few ribs crack, and then she jumped to gain height, and brought her arm down onto his back as he was doubled over, making him fall to the ground. She saw her knife and rolled over to it. She grabbed it mid roll and landed in a crouch facing Steve, and a gun pointed at her. Steve was barely standing, but he had a gun in his hand.

"You won't pull the trigger. I've heard stories about you."

She was right, but his hands were shaking so badly that his finger squeezed the trigger. He watched in amazement as she darted around the bullet, grabbed his wrist, twisted herself around, and pull him over her body through the air. He hit the ground on his back and didn't have time to react before she jumped on his and started punching his face. She paused for a moment and then he spoke.

"Come on doll face, do it."

She froze. She pictured the doll she used to have, the one she took from the little girl she killed by accident when she was sent to kill that arms dealer many years ago. Regret crept into her heart, but she squashed it by the fear of what Ivan would do if he learned she failed this mission. She grabbed him by the throat and started to choke the life out of him. Instead of trying to get away, Steve just stared into her eyes. That feeling of regret crept back in and when his eyes closed, she forced herself to stop before it killed him. Too many flashbacks had left her with a strange feeling of care for this man. She just couldn't do it. She checked him and found him to still be breathing, but unconscious. She had to get out of there, but first, she needed to go to the lab to get Darcy. Hopefully she would be there.

Natalia left the beaten Captain America lying bleeding on the training room floor and tried as calmly but quickly as possible make her way to the lab. She was careful not to get any blood on her clothes, so she looked pretty good, just a little sweaty. She got to the lab and walked in, but was dismayed when she saw that Darcy was not there, just Loki in his cell. She turned to leave but Loki called out to her.

Annoyed, she turned and walked to him.

"What, make it quick."

"Well it's nice to see you too Natasha. How is your day going?"

Knowing that this conversation was getting nowhere, she rolled on her heels to walk away.

"Wait. I know you are upset about Bruce." This stopped her in her tracks. Again, she walked over to his cell.

"Natasha, I see how concerned you are. The way you keep asking about him, you are afraid he will not make it. I'm just letting you know I'm here for you."

For the hundredth time that day, she was pissed, again. In her fury, she had another flashback.

Before James had joined the team, and before she had received her serum, she was sparring with another girl. Spars in Red Room were always brutal and there was blood already littering the floor from the fights before. Her opponent slipped in a small puddle of it and cracked her head on the ground. Their fight had been going on for 45 minutes now and they had both been exhausted. The other girl didn't even try to catch herself when she fell, and the impact to her head killed her. Natalia bent over to check on her with concern etched across her face, not knowing that she was dead. She was then yanked back by Ivan, who watched all of her fights. He hit her across the face and yelled at her.

"Never show concern for another human being! You never know when it could be a trick and then BAM! They get you. He threw her to the floor and then getting an idea, he grabbed her and drug her outside. She watched as he commanded his men to construct a circle around her with wood and gasoline. She showed no emotion even though she knew what he was doing. She sat in the middle.

"Never show concern for anyone. It will get you killed. I hope you learn your lesson. He then struck a match and she was surrounded by a ring of fire. She stayed in that ring of fire for 8 days straight with no food, water, or relief from the intense burn and fear."

She came out of the flashback even more pissed off. She didn't notice Clint and Tony enter behind her since she was stuck in her flashback. Facing Loki, with her back to the other two men, she went off on him.

"How dare you. I could care less about Bruce. He got what was coming to him. I'm not afraid of losing him, hell, I TRIED to kill him. I'm never afraid. Fear is for the weak, and I am not weak. I'm as strong as ever!"

Knowing Tony and Clint were there listening, Loki decided to test his theory.

When she was about to turn to leave, not fully facing the boys yet, Loki called out to her.

"Natalia?"

Not caring about her cover since she was leaving anyways, answered him.

"What now Loki?" She saw him smirk, and then heard two voices simultaneously.

"Oh Shit," she heard Tony and Clint exclaim.


	18. RR18 The Bus

**Thanks for the reviews, favs, and follows! You guys inspire me! Sorry sailorraven34, no Loki in this chapter, but he will be in the next! Enjoy!**

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CH 18 – The Bus

Natalia whirled around, not knowing that the two boys had entered the lab behind her, and assumed a defensive stance.

"_Shit", _she thought. Now she really had to leave, but the boys were blocking the way out. Not taking their eyes off of her, Tony called out to JARVIS to summon Steve and Thor. If this was Natalia, they would need back up. While waiting for JARVIS to find them, Clint asked if it was really her.

"Natasha?" He asked.

"Guess again bird brain," she answered.

"Natalia." Tony simply stated, and she smiled.

JARVIS then interrupted. "Sir, Thor is on his way, but I have found Mr. Rogers unconscious in the training room." The screens in the room then jumped to life and showed the very unconscious and bloodied Steve knocked out onto the floor. The two looked at Natalia in fear. All she did was smile.

"Yeah sorry about that, Bruce too," she said in a flat voice, clearly not meaning it.

"Now move," she commanded. She needed to leave. Clint and Tony she could handle, but she wasn't so sure about Thor. The boys, not wanting her to escape, moved towards her, and she moved towards them. They came face to face, and they really didn't know what to do. She smiled sweetly at them, but it wasn't Natasha they saw in her eyes. The eyes they looked into were cold and very pissed. Before they knew it, she had them sprawled on the floor. She grabbed Darcy's taser off a nearby table as fast as lightning and then tased the two. They too were now unconscious, along with Steve. They barely fought back, not wanting to injure their "friend." She then hacked into the towers system and disabled anything that would help them communicate with the outside world. She also disabled JARVIS, and shut down all exits, leaving one open for her to manually close so that she could leave the building.

"Natalia wait, I can help you," Loki said from his cell. She looked back at him and said, "I don't need any help." With that, she ran from the lab.

She ran to her room to grab some things before she left. She grabbed what she needed, and then headed to Darcy's room, hoping that she was there. She still hadn't seen Thor. When she got to Darcy's room, she knocked like she usually did and was greeted by the oblivious brunette. She needed her hacking skills to find out where to go next.

"Hey Natasha! What's up?" she asked innocently.

"Uhhh, mental breakdown." She lied. "I need to get away, and I don't want to go alone. Will you please go with me? You are the only one I can stand to be around since I woke up." She made herself sound as sincere as possible.

Darcy understood. She had been spending a lot of time with the red head. She even poured out her life story to her. Natasha had to be upset about Bruce still being in a coma.

"Sure! I'll go with you! Where to? The movies, shopping, out to eat…?

"I don't know yet, Washington maybe." She really didn't know. The people she was looking for were very hard to find, and the last location she found them at was somewhere in Washington state one day ago. They were SHIELD, a special team, and she needed the hacker on board. She was one of the best in the world.

"What about the team? Do they know you want to leave for a while?" Darcy asked.

"I need to meet with someone to help me with something. I thought a road trip would be nice. Are you in? I also need help finding this someone."

A road trip did sound exciting. And traveling with Natasha would be a once in a lifetime experience. Of course she would go!

"Sure thing babe, let me grab some stuff."

"Hurry," Natalia responded on edge, still not knowing where Thor was.

Darcy came back within 5 minutes and the two left for the parking garage. Darcy took the wheel and they headed to the airport. They met no trouble on the way and the entire tower was now on lockdown. Thor must have tried reviving the guys, and then most likely ran to find Jane in a panic that something may have happened to her.

Natalia brought no guns or knives with her, knowing that airport security was thorough these days. She was a bit nervous about getting onto such a large aircraft. They made it onto the plane with no difficulty.

"Do you have a phone with you? I need to check in with Jane. She will want to know where we are."

Natalia nodded but didn't hand it over. "I texted her just before we boarded. She said to have fun."

Darcy grinned and said, "she knows we can handle ourselves. After all, I'm an excellent hacker and could get us out of any technical trouble, and you, well, you can get us out of any type of trouble. We make a good team."

Natalia smiled at this. The women settled themselves in for the long flight and soon drifted to sleep.

After landing at Bandera State Airport in Washington, they rented a car and drove to a nearby diner. They both ordered and Natalia fabricated a text to show Darcy. She set a timer for it to come through and just before it went off, she made sure her hands were occupied.

_Bzzzz bzzzzz. _The phone buzzed as the message came though. "Could you see who that is Darcy?"

"Sure thing partner," she said as she winked at the red head and reached for the phone. "Ooooh! It's Jane. It says _The boys all got drunk last night and I'm currently cleaning off vomit from the living room floor. I hope you two are having fun at least." _Darcy laughed and responded to the fake text.

It said, "_Good luck with that! We are currently looking at trucker butts and damn some of them are fine."_

She handed the phone back to Natalia and she was pleased that her plan worked.

"Okay, Darcy, I need to know where this certain signal is coming from. Can you try and find it?" Natalia had isolated a transmission from the SHIELD base she was looking for but since it was mobile, she didn't know exactly where it was currently stationed. She needed Darcy to find it, if it was even still there. Darcy didn't need to know she was looking for SHIELD. All she knew is that they were supposed to be finding only one man, and he was certainly not a part of SHIELD.

"Ummm sure!" She grabbed the phone and isolated the general area, though not the precise location. BUT Within minutes, she found it. They were somewhere in Seattle. Now she needed a plan to get in. She couldn't just walk up and knock, they would need to come to her to make it look unplanned. She excused herself to walk out for some 'fresh air' while they waited for their food. She walked to the pawn shop next door and bought a pair of guns and a few knives. After her purchase, she walked back to the diner, concealing her weapons as she walked.

They finished their meal and set off for the drive to Seattle. Natalia had already tipped off some people who were anti SHIELD. They knew that Natasha Romanoff was now in the area, and they were going to target the two.

They arrived a little later and Natalia kept her eyes peeled as she drove to a nearby busy area. They got out of the cramped car and Natalia explained to Darcy that she was meeting a contact here, even though she wasn't. It had to look like a random place to be attacked, and also provide a cover story for when the SHIELD team 'rescued' them. They started walking down the busy street and that's when she noticed that they were being followed. "_Finally," _she thought.

She assumed them to be HYDRA by the way they attacked. They were organized and skillful. She shoved Darcy out of the way just before a bullet reached the young girl. She spun around and dropped the guy within seconds. Chaos erupted around them as bullets started flying. She saw a man pull out a cell phone as he took cover near them, not being able to move. He had called the police saying that the all too famous HYDRA was attacking the street. HYDRA was famous now after they tried to take down SHIELD. Natalia smiled as she continued fighting with her own guns and knives. There was no doubt the people she wanted to find would pick up police chatter and immediately respond at the mention of HYDRA.

With her advanced speed, she took down more and more men, snapping wrists, arms, and legs. She hadn't gotten hit once with a bullet yet, even though they were flying. She managed to put on a show and even shoved innocent people behind tables and into shops to protect them. There were more men than she anticipated, but she could handle them. Just as she ripped a gun from one of the men's hands, she noticed people on her side fighting with her. They had arrived. She fought back to back with a black haired woman. They both fired their weapons at the enemy, while another woman with dark blonde hair fought a group off to the side. Within minutes, the fight was nearly over. Natalia, of course, had either killed or wounded the majority of them. She didn't even have a scratch on her. _That wouldn't look too good. The other two agents already had a few cuts, and they haven't even been here five minutes. _With a sigh, she shoved one of the men to her side, directly in line with the blonde haired SHELD agent. She knew he would fire at the woman, so for dramatic effect, she flung herself in front of her, taking a bullet to the shoulder. She grabbed at her shoulder and then threw a knife into her attacker, instantly killing him. No one noticed the exchange, but that didn't matter. She was almost sure that the team would pull up video footage to review, and then see what she had done to protect the agent. She smiled to herself.

After another couple minutes, the fight was over.

Natalia ignored her throbbing shoulder and faking worry, she ignored the two SHIELD agents and ran to where she last saw Darcy. She faked relief when she found her unharmed. She helped her up and turned to find the two agents there.

Natalia raised a questioning eyebrow, pretending not to know who they were. They explained themselves soon enough.

"I'm agent Melinda May, and this is agenda Bobbi Morse. We heard that HYDRA was in the area and that you were greatly outnumbered. I can see that you had the situation under control though," the black haired woman said as she scanned the area full of men that Natalia had taken down.

"Yea, thanks for the help, I appreciate it. I've got to get going though."

"No!" she heard from the other female agent she had 'protected'. She raised her eyebrow at the flustered woman. "I mean, I know who you are, and you are a legend. Please, come back to the bus with us. I know a few people who would love to meet you."

Agent Morse begged her to stay. The Black Widow was a legend, and she wanted to talk with her. Agent May though, shot her a warning look. Before she could say anything though, Natalia answered with a 'yes'. She was finally in.

The ride to what they called 'The Bus' was a short one. It turns out that they were parked closer than thought. Also, The Bus wasn't really a bus, it was a plane.

The ramp was already open and a dark haired girl ran out to meet them.

"May!" She called. She stopped abruptly when she noticed her two friends being followed by two women.

"Relax Skye, they are friends," May explained. "Call everyone to the lab, except for AC, but fill him in." Tell him The Black Widow is here." May watched the young agent gasp in shock. She had heard the stories of the famous Black Widow.

Natalia's interest peaked when she heard the warning in Agent May's voice when she advised against calling 'AC'. She wasn't sure if it was important or not, but she catalogued in into her mind. As Skye retreated back into the plane, Darcy grabbed Natalia's shoulder to ask her if she was okay to be there. The girl gasped in shock when her hand came back red with blood.

"Holy shit, Nat, you've been shot!" Darcy started her worry dance while Agent Morse turned around in surprise to look at the wound.

"Oh yea," Natalia said. "Almost forgot about that."

Agent May then herded the group onto the plane and then towards the lab. Natalia couldn't help but admire the beauty of the place. It had everything, even bunk beds and a bar. And was that a fish tank in the corner? When they got to the lab, a young British girl nervously approached and asked if Natalia would lower her sleeve so that she could assess the bullet wound.

Natalia didn't want to be touched. "It really isn't necessary," she said. "I'm a fast healer." She turned to leave and was blocked by Agent May and Darcy. Darcy was the one who approached her and pushed her onto the table. Natalia allowed it.

"Sorry chick, but you got shot. This lady needs to look at it." Then she leaned to Natalia's ear and whispered. "Do they know you can heal fast?"

Natalia just glared at her, and Darcy backed off. She then allowed the doctor to approach. She couldn't help but notice her tremble.

"Something wrong?" she asked.

"No, nothing wrong here! I treat agents all the time!" The girl had a fake smile plastered on her face, and then it broke. "Okay, okay, I'm just a tad bit nervous to be treating Natasha Romanoff. You could kill me with a pinky! In truth, I may be more wary of you than Agent May."

"_Agent May, dangerous." _She thought, making a mental note.

"Simmons," Agent Morse warned.

"Right. You're hurt. You're shirt please?"

The doctor, Jemma Simmons, carefully cleaned the wound after Natalia lowered her sleeve. Natalia was prepared for the doctor's reaction.

"Umm, Agent Romanoff? When exactly did you get shot?"

Agent May answered for her with, "just under an hour ago."

"But that's impossible! Her wound shows exponential healing! Wait, I think I can see the bullet right at the surface." As she reached for the tweezers to remove it, the rest of the team watched as the bullet pushed its way out of her shoulder and tinkle to the floor.

All Natalia had to offer was "Told you." She jumped from the counter and pulled her sleeve back up, leaving Simmons flabbergasted. Even Agent May and Agent Morse looked surprised.

With science taking over, Simmons asked in a daze, "But how is that possible?"

Darcy answered for her. "Super Soldier serum. She got the original serum. I'm sure you guys know Captain America. His was more diluted. My friend here is better than the Star Spangled Wonder, older too." She shut up when Darcy mentioned the older part.

The team looked shocked, they clearly didn't know, and she clearly didn't care. She barely caught the whispered words from agent May to Simmons, "So that's why she's indexed."

"Are we done here?" She asked when the stares became uncomfortable.

"Um, yes, I believe we are," Simmons answered. "Skye asked for us to meet here. I'm sure Fitz, Hunter, and Mack will be here shortly."

As if on cue, the rest of the teamed entered. All of them were curious when they heard that The Black Widow was on board. Skye looked excited this time.

They all crowded around the table, waiting for the 'meeting' to start. When no one said anything, Hunter piped up with,

"I call this meeting to order!"

Fitz and Mack laughed at the agent and Agent May and Morse rolled their eyes.

Natalia assumed that Agent May was in charge when she formally took point of the meeting. "Ok guys, as you all know, Agent Romanoff ran into some trouble today. We are here to find out why, and what HYDRA wanted with them."

"It was HYDRA who attacked?" Skye asked? "Was Ward with them?"

Agent Morse answered with a "No" and Agent May continued.

"Do you have any idea why they attacked?"

"No, but I'm pretty sure it was because I'm not really the most liked person in the world," Natalia answered.

"Aww, I love ya babe," Darcy said with a wink. She was really getting on her nerves.

The tall guy, Mack, then asked her what they were doing here in Seattle. She answered by telling the truth.

"I'm looking for someone, and so far I tracked him to here."

Agent Morse then asked her who it was.

"That's for me to know, and you to not find out. It's a solo mission, with Darcy," she added.

They asked her a few more questions about the HYDRA team that attacked and then Skye hacked into the street cameras to see what actually went down.

"_Bingo,_" Natalia thought. She had found the hacker she was looking for. She was a little young to be a hacker, but from what she knew of the young girl, she was good. She then turned her attention to the video feed.

They all watched as HYDRA appeared from all around and watched how Natalia had pushed Darcy to the side, saving her from a barrage of bullets. She took down so many men so fast, they could barely follow her movements. She even saved a number of civilians. Agent Morse gasped when she saw Natalia jump in front of a bullet meant for her. When the feed ended, they all discussed what to do next. It ended when Agent Morse offered for Natalia and Darcy to stay at least the night, since it had gotten dark. The two agreed, and were then led to their bunks to rest. Natalia was pleased, it gave her some time to convince Skye to find her guy. It gave her time to find James.

After being dropped off at their bunks, Natalia overheard Skye excitedly say to Simmons,

"I can't believe I'm sleeping under the same roof as The Calvary, The Mockingbird, and The Black Widow!"

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**Sorry it's so short guys! I've been so busy. If you haven't watched Agents of SHIELD, that's where all of these new agents came from. And for those of you who do watch it, I know that at this time period, they are at a ground base, but I love The Bus so much that they are there so HA! Also, I don't expect the non-Agents of SHIELD watchers to know who 'AC' is, it is not relevant to this story, but the watchers of the show DO know who it is and I don't want to spoil it for the non-watchers by calling him by his full name, I just used the one Skye calls him by. Not to worry, I'm not keeping Agents of SHIELD in the story. I just needed a way for Natalia to find James, and there was no way she would have been able to find him at the Tower since Steve would have already found him if the information was available to him, so I improvised. I also know that at this time in Agents of Shield, The Avengers aren't together but in this AU, they are. Also, Agent Melinda May = The Calvary, Agent Bobbie Morse = The Mockingbird. Hope this helps! Loki is in the next chapter as well as some more flashbacks!**


	19. RR19 Intel

**Thank you all for the follows, favs, and reviews! You guys are the ones keeping me going on this story, as well as the huge twist I will be putting on it pretty soon. Oh! Make sure to read my comment at the end of the story, Thanks!**

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Ch 19 - Intel

Natalia had some time to think after the meeting in the lab with the SHIELD team. After about an hour or so, she grabbed a laptop that was in her room and left for the common room. When she arrived, it was empty. She found a comfortable spot on the couch and set to work trying to find James. Darcy was still in her room resting. Natalia didn't know where the rest of the team was, she only hoped The Avengers hadn't escaped the tower and alerted them of the situation. Just to check, she hacked her way into the tower and was pleased to find it still on lockdown. She then focused on James.

Using what hacking skills she had, she searched the web for footage of The Winter Soldier. She got excited when she found a HYDRA leak. After a little digging, she found blurry video footage of a man leaving a building somewhere in Canada about two months ago. After thinking about it for a while, she started to wonder why someone would video a seemingly normal man just leaving a building. That's when she noticed that the man was wearing a large coat, one that would certainly cover his arms. She then noticed the way he walked and carried himself. Even though she couldn't see his face through the blurriness, she knew it was him. She was a bit surprised though to find that HYDRA was after him. Wasn't he a part of HYDRA? She had so many questions and not enough answers. After digging for a few more hours, she hadn't found anything else.

While sitting in silence, she heard footsteps approaching the lounge. She figured them to be female, lightweight, and not a trained agent. The steps were not loud, but were not quiet either. It had to be either Skye or Jemma. She banked on it being Skye, and she was right.

Natalia's presence startled Skye when she came into view. Natalia looked up when Skye walked over, and noticed the girl's apprehension.

"Skye, right?" she asked.

The other girl smiled and relaxed slightly. "Yea, what are you doing up so late?" She took a seat next to the red head.

Natalia sighed and looked back at the computer. "I'm trying to find someone who doesn't want to be found."

"The guy you were supposed to meet today?"

She shook her head. "He would have been a dead end anyways. If he knew what was good for him, he would have left the country if HYDRA saw him. It was worth a shot trying to speak with him." Natalia was a good liar, and Skye was drinking up her words.

"Maybe I can help? I'm good at this kind of stuff, it's kind of my specialty. I mean if you want that is." Skye was worried that she had overstepped a boundary. She was so nervous to be talking with a deadly assassin.

This made Natalia excited, her trap was working. "I can't ask you to do that. If anyone knew who I was looking for, they could be in danger. I can't even tell Darcy yet, or I would be pulled from this mission. It's too dangerous."

Skye didn't care about danger. She was always wanting to test her skills. And to help out Natasha Romanoff, it was a thrill. Plus, she had no reason not to trust her. She was an Avenger! "I don't care. It would stay between me and you! If I blabbed, I'm sure you would end my life!"

Natalia acted like she was thinking about it. "Fine, but if you tell anyone, I mean anyone, you could jeopardize this entire mission and I would get you pulled from this team so fast you wouldn't even know what hit you."

Skye gulped in fear. "Deal. So what have you got so far?"

Natalia glanced around, not trusting all the open entryways where someone could over hear them.

Skye noticed this and suggested they go to her room. Natalia agreed and they made their way there.

Natalia glanced around the small room. It wasn't very furnished with any personal items, but it did have a couple of laptops and other electronic devices. They both sat on Skye's bed with their backs to the wall, and a laptop on Natalia's lap.

"Okay, the last location I found him at was in Canada, two months ago. After that, I can't find anything. This video is too damn blurry, but I know it's him."

"Where did you find this video?" Skye asked.

"I picked up a HYDRA leak, and it led me right to it. I don't know why HYDRA is after him, he is supposed to be a part of HYDRA."

Skye looked at her. "Why do you need to find a HYDRA agent?"

"He's not an agent, "she responded, looking at the confused girl. "He's a weapon."

"I know that he's all hush hush, but who is it that you are looking for exactly?"

Natalia smiled, "The Winter Soldier."

"Holy shit!" the girl exclaimed. "What the hell do you need with him!?"

The loud noise from the girl caught Natalia off guard. She shot her hand out and placed it over the dark haired girl's mouth to shut her up. "Shhhh, we don't want to wake the entire plane."

As soon as Natalia removed her hand, Skye continued her barrage of questions, but this time in a much quieter voice.

"Why are you looking for him? I though Captain America was trailing him."

Natalia lied again. "He was, but kept coming up with dead ends. He wouldn't let anyone else help him. The mission affected him emotionally. The Winter Soldier and him used to be close friends, which you already know I'm sure." Skye nodded at her.

"Well, he came back from one of his searches and he just looked so defeated, he wasn't acting the same. SHIELD was no longer helping him since The Winter Soldier wasn't causing any more trouble. Rogers didn't have the resources he needed. From Avengers Tower, he just didn't have access to files to find him. He kind of dropped off the grid. From what I have found, HYDRA is hunting him down, and I want to get to him before they do. So, I was sent to meet this guy here in Seattle, but since I hit the end of that road, I'm back where I started."

Once again, Skye was drinking in her words. She was even more elated to find out she was in a way helping Captain America as well.

"Got it," was all she said. She then took the computer from Natalia and started typing furiously on the keyboard. "I'll use The Bus's database since it has access to more restricted files and can search further into the systems." After a few more minutes of typing away, Skye slipped a small smile. "I'm getting some stuff, but this could take a while."

"Thanks Skye." Natalia motioned towards one of Skye's laptops. "May I?"

Skye nodded at her. Natalia picked up the laptop and began going through the information Skye was finding, and giving her any info that she needed.

After a few hours, Skye closed the laptop she was working on. "Okay, we have narrowed the search to somewhere in Germany. I contacted some of my Rising Tide friends, don't tell anyone by the way, and they will dig some and get back to me in the morning. That's all we can do for tonight."

Natalia smiled at her and closed the laptop she was working on. "Thank you so much Skye, I couldn't have done it without you. You just may be the world's best hacker."

Skye beamed at the comment. "I don't know about that, Agent Romanoff, but thanks."

Natalia got up from the bed. "I'm sure I'll be leaving tomorrow, so as soon as you get anymore intel, let me know. I'll see you in the morning." With that, she left the hackers room and headed back to hers. The plane was as quiet as could be due to the late hours, and Natalia was actually looking forward to sleep. It had been a long day and she was one step closer to finding James.

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It was gloomy in the room, and looked foreign in the unnatural light. The floor felt so cold, and there was a weird noise in the room. What was that noise? He rolled over to try and figure out what was going on. He saw a man kneeling over him. His lips were moving, but, oh, that must be the sound he was hearing. He looked so familiar… Thor! He jumped up, annoyed with the dimness of the emergency generator lights.

"Be calm, friend Tony, you were unconscious. You both were." Tony looked over to see Clint and Jane, wrapping bandages around Steve.

"I found him in the training room on my way here after JARVIS alerted me to the situation." Thor said.

Tony made his way over to the two and noticed Steve conscious. "Hey buddy, how ya feeling?"

"About as good as I look." He grimaced in pain and then passed out again.

"He keeps doing that," Clint said. "I think he will be okay though."

Tony then noticed the tears in Jane's eyes. "Jane, you heard Clint. He's been injured plenty enough times to know when someone is gonna pull through."

Jane looked at him angrily. "I know that Tony, what I'm afraid of is Natalia. She has Darcy."

Tony's stomach dropped. Natalia with a hostage was bad news. From what he saw on the memory trip, they never lasted long. He then turned to the cell Loki was in when Jane yelled at the god.

"Find her, and bring her back, now," she demanded Loki.

Loki looked at her sadly. "I can't."

Jane looked at him angrily. "Yes you can, I'll let you out and you can teleport to her."

"He really can't, Jane," Tony said as he walked over to the switch to the door and let him out.

"What do you mean he can't," Jane cried.

Tony sighed. "The walls of the entire tower prevent any inhuman from escaping by use of powers. I mean, they can walk right out of a door, but if the tower was on lockdown, like it is now, his teleporting powers are useless. He can teleport within the tower, just not to the outside."

"Then get a damn door open!" She was hysterical. Thor wrapped her in his arms and Tony sighed and walked over to his computer to see what he could do.

Loki in the meantime, tried to reach his mind out to Natalia, but it wasn't working because of the walls. He could feel her, but couldn't connect. He then tried to help Clint with Steve. Steve was awake now, and wasn't slipping back into unconsciousness.

Clint looked to Loki in dead seriousness. "Do you really think you could help her?"

"I can try, if she has even the slightest bit of humanity left, I can help her. I've been trying to unblock a memory I took from her. I just need to touch her, and it will all come back."

This time Steve spoke. "She can be helped. She could have killed me, but she held back. I saw it in her eyes. We need Natasha back."

"Wait, what memory exactly did you steal? And why?" Clint asked.

"I can't tell you, it's something Natasha will have to tell you. It's not my place, but she is the one who made me take it."

He jumped when Jane suddenly appeared in front of him. "This memory didn't happen to occur in 1953 did it?"

"You remember, and yes, that's when it happened."

"What are yall talking about?" Clint asked confused.

Jane explained. "Darcy, Loki, and I were watching a movie a while back and Natasha came in and joined us. We started talking and all of a sudden Loki asked if she remembered 'that time in 1953 when she saw all the blood in the snow'." Jane suddenly gasped. "Oh my gosh! She got really confused and in a way asked what year it was! She looked kind of shocked when we told her 2014! She was Natalia then! And you knew!"

Loki held up his hands in defense. "I didn't know for sure, and I was trying to wake up that memory to see If she remembered or not. She obviously hadn't."

Steve spoke up this time. "How long had you suspected it was Natalia?"

"The moment she woke up."

Thor, Jane, Clint, Steve, and even Tony who had tuned into the conversation and walked from the computer, all gasped.

Clint looked devastated. "It's been Natalia the whole time, and we didn't even notice. What kind of friend are we!"

Loki tried calming him down. "Clint, Natalia has been trained as a master manipulator. We figured out all those years ago, after she took down Red Room, that if she held back, the serum in her body would start to fade since it wasn't being used. She, Natasha, not Natalia, subconsciously knows that if she doesn't use all of her strength, her speed, her healing, any of that, she can slow down the amount of serum flowing through her body. That's why you never really noticed how special she was. She was holding back."

Steve looked thoughtful. "You mean she has been slowing down her own body and instincts, just to feel normal?"

"No Steve, not to feel normal." They all looked at him in confusion.

"She does it all without her knowing because of that memory. She wants to die."

"What the hell Loki!" Clint yelled at him.

"I will say no more, you will find out soon enough what I say is true.

Tony then turned to him. "Hold up, she is suddenly stronger and faster now because she isn't holding back? The serum is pumping faster now?"

"Yes Tony. Natalia doesn't know Natasha. She doesn't know any of you, and she doesn't know her own mind at the moment. She isn't holding back because she hasn't trained herself to do so yet. The serum stores itself, and when extreme physical activity is demanded, it mixes with some chemical the body produces, and multiplies itself. It is never ending."

"It's so fascinating, "Jane piped up. "How do you know all of this?

"I read the files, back then of course, before Natalia destroyed them." Loki looked smug.

Tony just couldn't believe it. He stood there looking at the floor before he felt five pairs of eyes on him. "What?" he asked.

Clint rolled his eyes, "the systems, Tony. What did you find out?"

"Oh that! Yes, we're screwed. The system was designed not to let anyone out, unless someone from the outside disarms it."

"Why the hell would you design a system like that Tony!" Clint yelled at him.

"Because, Clint, what if someone were to say take over your mind, and use the access codes stored in there to wreak havoc in the most dangerous and weaponized tower of all of New York?"

Clint looked hurt, still not over the mind control Loki put him under during the Chitauri invasion. "Oh," was all he said.

"We are basically sitting ducks until someone discovers us missing…great," Jane said defeated. She was terrified for Darcy. She had to be in a world of hell.

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"This is heaven!" Darcy exclaimed as she took another bite of breakfast. Fitz and Simmons made a huge breakfast for everyone, and no one was going to miss it. The breakfast table was crowded with all kinds of dishes, as well as people, as they dug into the feast.

Natalia watched the close knit team interact, and became suspicious when Agent May made a plate and left, only to return a minute later empty handed. _"She must have taken it to 'AC'."_ She then dismissed it. She was damn curious to know who it was, but it wasn't relevant to her mission. She didn't need to know.

She quickly became annoyed when Agent Morse started asking her all kinds of questions. She answered them all with a smile on her face. The woman was only curious, having been graced with the woman she strived to be as good as. When Hunter started pining for Morse's attention, she looked over to Skye, who was chatting hacker talk with Darcy. Everyone was having a good time. She then noticed a beep coming from Skye's handheld, and watched as she checked it. She noticed the smile, and she then made eye contact with Natalia and nodded. She had found something.

She excused herself from the table and Natalia watched her leave. She waited another few minutes and Agent May then left, having finished her breakfast. She then non chalantly excused herself from the table and headed for Skye's bunk. She looked to see if she was followed, and the coast was clear. She slipped into the room and turned to see and excited Skye with her laptop open to a picture of a man with a metal arm.

"We got him."

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**Yayyy! Another chapter! Gonna be getting good soon! I want to ask you all a favor. I would like to start planning a new story, maybe even a few short ones, just to get my imagination going, but I need some ideas or prompts. What kind of story have you all been wanting to read? Message me with your ideas and I would love to start a new story dedicated to you! But not to worry, this one will continue on! You guys are such an inspiration. Thanks!**


	20. RR20 Danger

Ch 20- Danger

"Good job, where is he?" Natalia was overjoyed to have finally gotten closer to finding James. She needed him to answer so many questions. She watched as Skye pulled up the location.

"Kazakhstan."

"Shoot me the coordinates." With that, she left the room and headed to her own. She was ready to go. She passed Darcy on the way and gave her the heads up. Darcy looked sad at having to leave so soon but she knew not to question the red head. Before she even got to her room, she knew Skye was following her, but she continued on. When she slid open the door, Skye rushed in after her and closed it.

"What are you doing Skye?" she asked as she started throwing her stuff into her pack.

"I want to go with you. You might need me over there. I'm a trained agent. Please!"

Natalia didn't even have to think about her answer. "No. Thank you for all of your help, but I have Darcy to help with anything. It's too dangerous, and you aren't even supposed to know about it anyways."

"Natasha, think about it. Is Darcy anywhere as good as me? If she was, I'm sure you would have asked her to find The Winter Soldier."

"I said no, Skye." She shot the young girl a death glare that shut her up.

Skye rolled her eyes at the assassin, accepting defeat. "Fine, but take this." She handed Natalia her handheld. "It's got a bunch of encryption codes and some of my own algorithms to throw off any HYDRA agent."

Natalia was pleased, she could use it to keep SHIELD or the Avengers off her trail. She didn't care about HYDRA.

"Thanks." She threw it into her pack and turned to leave, Skye still following. She headed to the ramp to wait for Darcy. The other agents on board sensed that The Black Widow was leaving and came to say their goodbyes. After a few handshakes and good wishes, Darcy finally made it to the ramp, followed by Agent Simmons. Natalia could see that the young doctor was still nervous around her. Darcy said her goodbyes and they both thanked the group for their hospitality. She shot a wink at Skye and then walked to a waiting car.

May had a car waiting for them that they used to drive to the airport and they arrived with no complications. Natalia was sad that she had to leave her newfound weapons behind, but knew she could get more. She was more deadly with her hands anyways. She left Darcy waiting at a chair as she went to order tickets. She was dismayed at the long line, and then again when she learned that they had to catch a connecting flight later on. She was eager to get to Kazakhstan before James left again. She knew his constant changing of locations was to keep anyone from following, but she wasn't just anyone.

She walked back to where she left Darcy and found her missing. She shot her eyes around the room and sighed in relief when she saw the girl emerging from the bathrooms.

"Got the tickets, we leave in an hour." Darcy just nodded. Natalia narrowed her eyes as the girl sat back down, not making eye contact with her. She wasn't acting herself.

Natalia dropped her bag to the floor and sat beside the girl, placing her hand on her shoulder. Darcy visibly jumped, and Natalia snatched her hand back.

"Darce, I'm sorry, flashback?" she asked the girl.

"Umm yea, sorry, you just caught me by surprise. I'm gonna go grab some coffee." Darcy jumped up and headed in the direction of the nearby Starbucks. Natalia brushed off her weird behavior.

_**40 Minutes Earlier**_

Darcy watched as Natalia went to get the tickets, and then quickly became bored. She decided she would try and get a hold of Jane so she walked over to some payphones. She put her money in and dialed the familiar number. Her heart sank as it went straight to voicemail. Not giving up, she dialed Clint's, then Tony's, then Steve's, all going straight to voicemail. Noting the weirdness of every single one not working, she dialed the Avengers Tower main line, and found that it wasn't in service. She even tried the lobby. This was just too weird. She tried all the numbers she knew, and none worked.

She hung up the phone after using up all her change, and headed back to wait for Natasha. On her way, she saw an unattended laptop next to its distracted owner. Getting an idea, she grabbed it and made her way to the bathroom for privacy. She hacked her way into her friend's cell phones, and saw that they were all in service, but something was blocking the signal from going in or out. The same was for the towers communications. She needed a way in to the cameras to see what was going on, but nothing she tried was giving her access.

_Shit why didn't I think of that sooner!_ She wanted to kick herself for not thinking about it before. Skye had given her, her number that morning at breakfast. She could help. She used the number to hack into the phone. She waited for a few seconds before the girl answered.

"Hello?" Skye answered.

"Skye! It's me Darcy."

"Hey, I can't hear you very good, are you on a plane?"

"Nope, I'm on a laptop. It's got a crappy mic."

"Why are you calling me from a laptop? You know what, never mind. What ya need?"

"Call me crazy, but I need a way to get into a camera feed, but the thing is, I'm locked out and nothing I've tried has worked. Do you have any suggestions?"

"So Natasha finally told you about the mission?! I'm glad to help! Give me a sec to write something up. We are actually on our way to, well I don't know where, but it's going to be a long ride"

_What mission?_ She asked herself. After a few more minutes, Skye sent her an algorithm to use.

"Thanks Skye, I owe you one. I'll try it and see if it will work."

"No problem! And Darcy, be careful. The Winter Soldier is dangerous, but I'm sure you knew that already. Tell Natasha hi for me! Bye!"

Darcy was starting to worry. The Winter Soldier? Is that who she is looking for? She pushed her thoughts away and tried the algorithm. She had to tweak it some to get through some firewalls, but she got a piece of footage. She couldn't get a live feed, but she got a part of some stored from yesterday.

She was horrified by what she saw. The feed she happened to pull up was the lab, right when Natasha was talking to Loki, and then Clint and Tony walking in. She had audio and everything, and heard the reveal about Natalia. She then watched as Natalia attacked the two and ran from the lab. She found another clip of the training room, where Thor found Steve hurt pretty bad. The feed lasted for a few moments, but she knew it was Natalia that had seriously injured Captain America, and possibly even Bruce. The algorithm ran its course and then locked her out of the system again.

Her friends were in danger, and so was she. She just knew that they had to be locked in the tower. She was the only one who knew about it, besides Natalia. She should call Skye back, and tell her what was going on. No, she didn't have the full story, SHIELD could mess something up. Plus, they were already gone. She would have to do this on her own. She powered off the laptop and exited the bathroom. She deposited it back beside the still unaware owner, and made her way back to meet Natasha.

She was startled to see Natasha, no, Natalia just walking up, so she put on as good of a mask as she could muster, despite her terror. When she sat, Natalia put her hand on her shoulder, which terrified the girl. She jumped, but Natalia thought it was flashback she was having. She couldn't just sit there, she had to get up. Her fidgeting would give her away in a heartbeat.

"Umm yea, sorry, you just caught me by surprise. I'm gonna go grab some coffee." Darcy jumped up and headed in the direction of the nearby Starbucks. Natalia brushed off her weird behavior and sat down to try and plan what to do once they got to their destination.

Darcy headed to Starbucks, all along the way and in line, she tried to formulate a plan to get away. She couldn't think. She was no agent, she was just a girl.

"May I take your order?" The Starbucks lady asked.

"Umm, coffee, black, small." The cashier brushed off the weird behavior, having seen it many times when dealing with tired and distracted travelers. She prepared the drink, and handed it to the girl after taking the money.

Darcy was terrified of walking back to Natalia. She had heard so many stories about her, and even witnessed some from the clips when she was on the memory trip. She knew Natasha couldn't be in there, she wouldn't have hurt her teammates if she was. But why was _she_ here? Did Natalia need her for something? The more she thought about it, the more of a coincidence it seemed that SHIELD was in the same area when they got attacked by HYDRA. The signal Natasha, Natalia, had her trace did have some of the same signature as the algorithm Skye sent her. Natalia needed her to find SHIELD! She hated being tricked. And she did notice her and Skye together a lot. Skye was one of the best hackers in the world, and that's why Natalia needed her, to find The Winter Soldier using their extended database. But why? Was Skye in on it? It didn't seem like it, she must have been played as well. Natalia hadn't hurt her yet, but she knew it was a matter of time before she found out she knew about her, then things would get ugly. She had to get away.

With coffee in hand, she saw Natalia still sitting at the chairs. She dreaded walking back over to her, but she was soon saved. Sticking out of a man's back pocket, was a plane ticket. He was hurrying through the crowd, heading for his gate. Darcy reached out and grabbed it without anyone noticing. She looked at it, and the departure time indicated that it left in ten minutes, she had to hurry. It was headed straight to New York.

She quickly started walking to the gate. She threw a glance over her shoulder to find Natalia no longer sitting, she was walking straight towards her.

Natalia was growing impatient. She was ready to go, but they still had a little longer to wait. She looked over at Starbucks and saw Darcy getting her coffee. She looked back down at her handheld and scanned through the files of information she had gathered with Skye. After a few more minutes of waiting for Darcy, she looked back up, and saw her snatch a ticket from a man's pocket. She stood up to see what was going on. She then noticed the girl rushing away. Natalia headed towards her. She saw Darcy throw a glance over her shoulder to where she was sitting, and saw the fear cross her face.

_She knows_

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**Sorry its so short! I wasn't going to post today but I got bored and did.**


	21. RR21 Windows to the Soul

**Thanks guys for the reviews, favs, and follows! Especially **_**llll **_**who commented so quickly after the chapters went up. I laughed. And thank you **_**rohanyoshi, sailorraven34, CottonCandy, **_**and **_**Wolfdrache **_**for the motivating reviews. You guys rock and this chapter is for yall! Yall motivated me to write it!**

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Ch 21 – Windows to the Soul

Natalia cursed herself as Darcy started running. The look of fear that had crossed her face just a moment before told Natalia what she wanted to know. Darcy knew she was Natalia. _Fuck._ Natalia started her chase. She couldn't let Darcy get away. She would go straight for the tower and then the Avengers would be free. She could not let that happen, they would put an end to her plans. She had to get to Darcy before she got to them. James would just have to wait. People became a blur as she ran past them. She saw Darcy keep looking over her shoulder as she ran. Natalia was getting closer.

The moment she saw Natalia look at her, she ran. She had to somehow make it to the gate before she did. There was no way she would make it out of this situation alive if she didn't. The only problem was that the gate wasn't as close as she would have liked it to be. She dodged around people, almost tripping a few times in her panic. She could hear her heartbeat in her ears. Darcy had never been this terrified in her life. She had no clue if Natalia had a gun or knife on her. She was an assassin; they are very good at concealing.

Darcy risked another glance over her shoulder. The red head had gained on her. She was still a ways back there, but a lot closer. By glancing over her shoulder, she failed to notice a woman who had walked in her path. She hit the woman at a full run, sending them both sprawling. She shot a quick sorry before grabbing the woman's hat that had fallen, and ran around the corner. She heard the woman curse at her, but she slapped the hat on her head, dropped her jacket, and forced herself to walk calmly. She hoped that Natalia wouldn't recognize her now. She tried to slow her breathing and not look behind her. She could see the gate now. She was almost there, but then she noticed a person crowding her space. She risked a glance to her side, and almost passed out when she saw Natalia walking right beside her, with a smile on her face.

"Where do you think you are going Darcy?"

"Away from you!" she spat.

Natalia then grabbed her by the arm and pulled her to the side, letting other pedestrians pass. "Why do you want to run from me? I've done nothing to you. You're my friend Darce."

"If you are my friend, why are you gripping my arm so hard? And why can't I call anyone at the tower? And why did you need me to find SHIELD?"

"Damn it Darcy, why did you have to figure it out."

The grip on her arm tightened and Darcy saw the malice seep into the red heads eyes.

"Red Room needs me, Ivan needs me. I need to find James first before I go home. And you are going to help me."

"Are you fucking crazy? There is no Red Room, or Ivan! How are you even Natalia? Where is Natasha? Natasha, if you are in there, I need you to give me some kind of signal so I can kick your, her ass."

"Lower your voice Darcy, now come on, we have a flight to Kazakhstan to catch."

"No." Darcy wrenched her arm from Natalia's grasp. She then began yelling. "Help! She has a gun!" She began pointing accusingly at the red head. Security started appearing out of nowhere and the two quickly became separated. Darcy saw her chance and bolted towards her gate. She made it through security since they were distracted at Natalia. She almost threw her ticket at the attendant. She looked back, and saw a flash of red hair running from security, thankfully in the opposite direction. She sighed in relief and made her way onto the plane and then to her seat. She was safe, for now.

Natalia's fist found several noses as she fought her way from the security guards. She had to hand it to Darcy, that was pretty smart, but now she was mad. She ran from security, needing a way to lay low. She had no doubt they had her description and was posted at every gate now. She grabbed a coat, hat, and sunglasses as she passed people. She casually put them on as to not appear suspicious. She pulled a Darcy, and even snatched a plane ticket. She even walked right passed a security guard that looked to be on high alert. This was too easy, but she had to hurry.

She made it to the gate that the ticket showed, and snuck passed security by sticking close to a group of people all traveling together. She made it to the tunnel that connected the plane, and then waited until there was no one around. She then swung under the railing and dropped to the tarmac below. She looked around and seeing no one, took off at a run towards where Darcy's plane would be. She saw it when she rounded the bend, and then saw that the tunnel had been disconnected already and that the door was closed.

She ran for the belly of the plane. She looked around the bottom and found that she could get into the wheel compartment. She did, and then found herself in a small space that would surely crush her when the wheels went up. She glanced around in the dim light and saw a small door. She tried it, and found that it opened. Not wasting any time, she went through and found herself in the cargo hold of the plane. This would do most nicely. The plane then jumped to life. It prepared for takeoff as Natalia made herself comfortable.

Darcy felt so relieved when she heard the plane start up. That meant everything was locked and there was no way Natalia could get onto the plane. She had made it just in time. All the tension she had built up over the last hour suddenly left her body and she relaxed, slightly. She still didn't know how her friends were at the tower, or how to get in for that matter. She thought about it the rest of the way to New York.

The more she thought about it, the more she became convinced that Natalia disabled all of the towers systems and in turn triggered a tower wide lockdown. She must have left the one door open for them to leave. She then wondered why they hadn't sent Loki out, and then thought that after the alien invasion, Stark would have made damn well sure even a god couldn't escape. She was completely on her own to get them out. She really didn't want to contact Fury. He would put out a kill order for Natalia almost immediately, not giving them a chance to save Natasha, if she even could be saved. She was in a tight spot, but there was no way Tony would have an internal tower lockdown without there being a kill switch or something on the outside. He was too smart not to, she hoped. She would have to find it, and then…do something. She had no clue what.

Hours later, Darcy felt the wheels of the plane hit the runway. She had made it. The easy part was sitting on the plane thinking, now she had to actually do the hard part. _Operation Save the Avengers initiated._ She called a taxi after exiting the airport and made her way to the tower. When she was a few blocks away, traffic came to a standstill in the late afternoon.

"Typical New York," she muttered. Becoming frustrated, she jumped out of the cab and immediately headed down an alley. She had no money to pay the cab driver, so she ran. Her bags were still at the airport in Washington waiting by the chairs. She almost made it to the other side of the alley when a human shadow engulfed her from behind. Thinking it was the cab driver, she turned with her hands in the air to surrender, only to find a certain red haired assassin standing before her.

"Thought you could get away?" Natalia's voice dripped with malice. There was something happening in her mind that no one, not even she knew about. The flashbacks she had been having as well as the confusion, had messed her up. Feelings of hatred were seeping through the cracks. This hatred was what Natasha had tried so hard to push back, but Natalia didn't know. Natasha's feelings were towards Ivan, and what he made her do in the Red Room. Since Loki had tried bringing a stolen memory back, those feeling were also coming through, and Natalia embraced them. And right now, they were directed at Darcy.

Natalia pushed Darcy into the wall of the alley and placed her hand on the struggling girl's throat. Darcy's feet were lifted from the ground as the assassin tried choking the life out of her. She kicked out but to no avail. "Natalia…please…" she managed to choke out.

Getting angrier, Natalia released her hold on the girl, only to throw her to the ground. Darcy gasped for air and tried to crawl away on her hands and knees. Natalia grabbed her by the leg and pulled her back. Darcy fell onto her side, and Natalia kicked her in the stomach. She cried out in pain and blocked another kick from coming. As it came, she grabbed the flying leg, and pulled Natalia to the ground. She knew Natalia wouldn't suspect it. Once she was down, Darcy jumped up to try and run for it. She made it a few steps before she was grabbed again, and slammed into a wall. She felt the blood running down her face before she felt the pain. Falling to the ground, she looked up at Natalia in fear. She tried to move away and as she did, her arm brushed against a broken beer bottle. It cut her, but she grabbed it anyways and lunged at Natalia with it. As she drove the broken piece of glass into the red heads stomach, she caught a glimpse of something in her eyes. She knew it was Natasha. She was still in there. She would bet her life on it. She had always heard that the eyes are the window to a person's soul, and she just saw it. The look then vanished, and was replaced by fury. Natalia grabbed the broken glass from her stomach and immediately drove it into Darcy's leg. She was making quick friends with the ground as she found it again. This time though, she didn't get up. She just lay there, waiting for Natalia to kill her. She was in too much pain to fight back anymore. As she gave up, she heard a gunshot. She squeezed her eyes shut, waiting for the pain that followed, but found none. Three more shots rang out and she opened her eyes. Natalia was lying on the ground, and there were three men at the entrance to the alley with guns. They looked like thugs, and she guessed that this was their turf, and she was trespassing. She wasted no more time in laying there then. Natalia was down, for now, and she bit back her pain to rip the bottle out of her leg, and to run away. No more shots rang out as she rounded the corner and headed towards the tower. There were hardly any people on the streets by the time she made it to her destination. She was incredibly tired, but that was most likely due to her head trauma. She guessed concussion. It hadn't stopped bleeding and her jeans were a mess of blood from her leg as well. Her gray shirt was also stained from the gash on her forehead and cheek where blood had dripped and ran down.

She made it to the lobby door, and found that the titanium reinforcements were down and impenetrable. All windows looked blocked as well. She made her way around the building, only stumbling from faintness a few times. She was starting to get dizzy. Darcy then found a control box and thought that she could do something with it. Opening it up, she found a mess of wires. It looked totally foreign to her and she didn't know what to do. She felt her legs getting weak and knew she wouldn't last too much longer.

"Screw it," she said and grabbed a handful of wires. She ripped them out, hoping that something would work. She expected alarms or beeping but she heard nothing. It didn't work. She slunk down onto the ground and rested against the back wall. She had no more energy.

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"How the hell are we going to get out of here Tony," Clint said as he sat next to Steve on the lab couch. They had been all over the tower, looking for a weakness in the walls or weapons to shoot through, but the weapons they did find were connected through JARVIS who was offline. Tony could try and bypass it, but it could take days. Steve was feeling a little better, but was still in some pain. Thor had his hands full with Jane, trying to keep her calm. She was worried for Darcy.

"I don't know Clint, I'm working on it. It's not like I can rewrite a years' worth of programming."

Loki had also tried for weak spots in the wall, and found none. Tony was really good at what he does. He was currently looking over the memory machine. He didn't understand it too much, but he was thinking that they would have to use it again to get Natasha back. He wasn't sure, but he thought he could reach her before they had to resort to it.

"As soon as you can Loki, I want you to get Darcy away from her. I don't care what Natalia is doing, just get her back." Jane was still worrying.

Loki walked over to her and placed his hand on her shoulder. "Don't worry Jane; I will do what I can." Thor gave him a look. He was hoping that Loki wouldn't just leave. He was banking on the fact that he owed Natasha something and that he would stay to help them. Jane though, trusted him more. The group had spent a lot of time together the past few days and had gotten to know each other a little more. Clint would even stand next to him now without giving him a death glare.

After a few more hours of small talk and silence, Tony yelled excitedly. "I…something happened to the system!"

Clint jumped up. "You fixed it?"

"I didn't do it, it's, it's like part of the mainframe failed. I can use that shutdown section as an entry point and get the defenses down from here. Just give me a second." He tapped away as the team looked on in anticipation. After a few minutes, a loud whirring sounded and the lights came back on. There was then a loud mechanical sound as the titanium wall defenses lifted.

"Loki go!" Jane shouted. He apparated out of the room to where he felt Darcy. He expected to appear in some far off country, and was confused when he found himself right outside of the tower. He looked down and found Darcy slumped against the wall and injured.

"Hey dude, fancy meeting you here."

_Leave it to Darcy to make fun of a bad situation._ "Are you okay Darcy?" He kneeled down to check out the damage. She was a mess.

"Oh youuu know, just seeing twoooo of youuuu, no biggie."

She started slurring her words and it worried him. He gently collected her into his arms and she cried out in pain. He watched with worry as her eyes drooped closed, she had passed out. He then apparated back into the lab with her. As gently as possible, he layed her on the floor since the table was strewn with defense plans.

"Darcy!" Jane yelled as she ran over to her friend. She grabbed onto Thor when she saw the condition she was in.

"Where was she?" Clint asked as he started tending to her wounds to get the bleeding to stop. "Put pressure here," he said to Jane as he directed her to the leg wound.

Loki grabbed the medical kit from by the couch and handed it to Clint as he answered. "She was here, right behind the building slumped against the wall. She was awake and talking when I found her. She only passed out when I picked her up."

"She didn't happen to be next to a big metal box on the wall did she?" Tony asked as he kneeled next to Jane.

"Yes, she was."

"I knew it! She hacked into the system that helped me to fix it. She's gotta teach me how to do that."

"Actually, I just grabbed the wires and yanked the shit out it." Darcy had woken up to her usual snarky self.

"Darcy!" Jane was ecstatic. She helped Darcy to sit up. "What happened?"

"What happened? Oh shit! Lock the room down! Natalia wasn't too far behind me. How long was I out?"

"About 5 minutes," Loki said.

"I left her in the alley after she did this about 15 minutes ago, she could be here by now."

Tony jumped up and started the lockdown that only he could open this time. After the lab was locked down, he went back to the group.

Darcy winced every time Clint put on a new bandage, it was hard not to. He had to stich up her leg and arm from where she was cut by the beer bottle. Her cheek and forehead just required closure tape to pull the cuts together. Her bruised stomach couldn't really be helped. Clint checked her for a concussion but found that she didn't seem to have one.

As she was being taken care of, the team drilled her with questions.

"Where were yall?" Steve asked from the couch.

"Washington state. She needed me to find a part of SHIELD so she could use one of their hackers to find The Winter Soldier."

"Bucky? Why?" Stave asked.

"I actually don't know. I just figured it out this morning when I ran from Natalia."

"Why did you wait until today to run?" Thor asked.

"I just figured it out that it was Natalia this morning when I hacked into the towers cameras to see why you guys wouldn't answer your phones."

"You mean she never told you and you thought it was Natasha all this time?'

"Ummm yes. She's very good at lying."

"Does the SHIELD team know about the situation?" Tony asked.

"Only Skye, the hacker, and partially. I think Natalia played her as well. Agent May and Morse were the ones who found us after HYDRA attacked in Seattle, and I'm beginning to think Natalia set that up too as a way in."

"Agent Melinda May and Bobbi Morse?" Clint asked.

"Yea, why?"

"Are you serious! You met The Calvary and The Mockingbird before I did! Do you know how lucky you are?"

Jane sighed in relief. "I was convinced that you were going through hell the past few days and that she had kidnapped you. Wait, how did you get away from a super assassin?"

"Long story short, I stole a plane ticket and ran, she caught me, I yelled out in the airport that she had a gun, security tackled her, I ran onto the plane, got here, she somehow made it onto the same plane or something, caught me in an alley, beat me up, then some gang members or something shot her and I ran. Then I ripped the wires from the control box because I didn't know what else to do"

"Holy crap, way to go Darcy!" Clint high fived her. She winced but was glad to be feeling slightly better. Thor picked her up off of the floor once she was all patched up and sat her gently on the couch next to Steve.

"Hey lookie there, were twins!" Steve actually laughed at her.

The group then started to discuss what to do next. They didn't want Loki to go after Natalia just yet, they needed to talk strategy. As they talked, they didn't notice the extra presence in the room. They didn't notice that Natalia was watching them. She was in the air duct above them.

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**Tadaaa! New chapter! I'm taking requests on what you would like to see happen in the next chapter or a specific conversation anyone wants to see. Let me know!**


	22. RR22 Echoes

Ch 22- Echoes

She killed them. Natalia watched Darcy go down, and then felt the bullets pierce her flesh. The alley echoed with the shots of gunfire, and then she too went down. She had been shot. The pain of her wounds increased when the kicking began. As she lay on the dirty ground, she noticed that Darcy was gone. She must have run away as soon as Natalia had been hit. The thugs only got a few kicks in when her rage boiled over. She grabbed the nearest leg, and broke it at the knee; the man would never be able to use it again like he used to… if he lived. He fell to the ground as she felt herself stand up. The two remaining men looked at her in bewilderment. They had shot this girl three times. The red head took a bullet to the chest, stomach, and thigh, and she didn't look fazed.

"You ruined my clothes," was all she said before breaking the necks of the two men, and then laughing as the one with the broken knee screamed in agony and fear as he watched his two friends die in a matter of seconds. He looked at her pleadingly, as if to ask for mercy.

"No mercy." She brought her foot down onto the man's chest as he lay there. The alley echoed this time with the crack of a shattered rib cage. She stared into his eyes with hate as his lungs filled with blood and the life left his body. She then kneeled next to the lifeless forms, and for some reason, she started crying; she never cried. For two whole minutes, the alley echoed for a final time with the cries of a broken girl.

When she reached the tower, she found that its defenses were down. Darcy must have found a way to break in and made her way to the rest of the team. Natalia then entered through a side door, and immediately found her way into the air ducts and for some reason, they felt extremely familiar. She figured out a route to the lab and as soon as she heard the voices of Darcy and the team, the duct closed behind her as the lab was locked down once again. Darcy's warning must have gotten through to the team that she was coming for them. She peered through a vent and found that everyone, minus Bruce, was assembled around the dark haired girl. She heard her name as Darcy filled everyone in on what had happened in the last few days. Her skin crawled when she felt eyes on her.

It was Loki. He was peering up at her in secret, his eyes telling her that he wouldn't give her away. It disturbed her that she wasn't sure why he was doing it, and she felt as if she needed to get away. As quietly as she could, she made her way to the part of the duct that had closed off. She found some equipment on her side of the wall, and went through it. It looked like it would be able to disable the door, but why was it here? Did Loki put it here? Or did she, when she was undercover and needed to spy on the lab. Natasha must have encountered the problem of the lockdowns before, and kept the things here in case she ever needed it again. She had to hand it to her, as much as Natalia hated herself on the videos as Natasha, she made good plans.

Natalia set up the equipment as if she was on auto drive. Her hands worked like they knew what they were doing, and before she knew it, the wall silently slid down. She glanced behind her and cursed herself when she saw her blood smeared behind her.

The sight of blood was starting to make her sick and as soon as she turned to crawl away, she heard a clink. Freezing in place, she hoped the sound wouldn't alert the team to her presence. She looked for the source of the sound and quickly found it beneath her. The bullet from her chest had worked its way out of her body and had fallen to the smooth metal below. The voices below paused for a moment, but then picked back up. Her stomach started to tickle, and she caught the bullet that fell from it this time. Sighing quietly in frustration, she pulled the remaining one from her leg and set it next to the other two before attempting to leave again.

Natalia was all too relieved when her blood trail ended, and she was outside again. Taking a cab, she made her way back to the airport. Her plan was still to find James and have him tell her what the hell was going on, and maybe even convince him to help her take out The Avengers. She just didn't have the will to do it herself anymore.

Stealing the private jet was easy, it was the flying part that made her nervous. She had flown planes before, but this one was far more advanced. Again, her hands went on auto pilot and quickly learned the controls. She set her coordinates to the ones Skye had given her, and made the long journey to Kazakhstan. _He had better still be there_, she thought the whole way.

And he was…

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**Im soooooo sorry for the long break! I promise I will update this weekend. Don't be mad at me! Lol I started my senior year at college and it has been tough, but im back! Thank you to all who have followed, favorited, and reviewed. I read them all a few days ago and made the time to write this small little chapter. Loki finds Natasha in the next chapter and we will finally be able to see what happened 'that day' when Loki took her memory all those years ago. It will be very shocking any many of you may not like it haha. But don't hate me! Let me know what yall think!**


	23. RR23 Malenkaya

Ch 23

The town Natalia found herself in was small, but packed to the brim with people. It was no wonder James had decided to stay here, it was too easy to blend in. From a phone she stole, she was able to plug in the coordinates to get to a closer point where he was last seen. It took her longer than expect to get there due to the crowd of people, but eventually, she found the store she was looking for. Her plan was to blend in and look for him in case he returned. This store was one of the few in the town that sold a variety of goods, and would be a popular spot for out of town people like James.

Every half hour, Natalia changed her position so that if anyone was watching her, she wouldn't seem so suspicious. As she sat on a bench opposite of the store, a man stumbled from the edge of the crowd and fell onto her. Roughly shoving him off, he murmured what she thought was a quick apology and hurried off. It only took a few seconds for her to realize that he had shoved a note into her jacket pocket.

The note was written on a napkin in black ink, the handwriting familiar.

_Meet me here in 3 hours. _

It had to be a message from James. She crumpled up the napkin and shoved it into her jeans pocket. Since he had found her and obviously couldn't meet yet, she decided to find a room to get a shower and some rest. She couldn't remember the last time she had slept. She was exhausted and needed to be on the top of her game. James was a different person in this time, and she wasn't sure how they were supposed to act towards each other. Since her memory wipe, she had no idea what was going on.

Thanks to a gentleman's 'donation', Natalia was able to pay for a gun and some knives from a pawn shop, and a cheap room. She was now on the third story of a rundown hotel that overlooked the busy streets below. She got a quick shower and changed into some clothes she had stolen not too long ago, her others were still covered in blood.

As she towel dried her hair, she heard a board creak outside of the bathroom door. She placed the towel quietly on the floor and listened. For a few moments, she heard nothing, but then the bed creaked. There was someone in her room. Not fearful, she threw open the door with a dagger in her hand ready to throw, but there was no one there. She walked to the middle of the room and scanned it. The door was still locked and everything looked the same, except for the corner of the bed. The sheets were slightly rumpled and she knew it wasn't from her since she hadn't touched the bed yet.

The breath on the back of her neck scared her.

"Malenkaya," the voice whispered. She whipped her head around to find herself staring into bright green eyes. She had not heard that word in years, and the sound of it brought tears to her eyes. Sudden emotions took over Natalia as she covered her mouth to keep from crying in front of this man but it was no use. Spilled tears ran down her face and she started to crumple to the floor, but he caught her, and held her close.

Trust, she had complete trust in this man. She knew that the word he had used was only shared between them, and though she couldn't remember the memory that went with it, she knew it was because of him, because of Loki. He was protecting her from something, he had taken the memory.

She cried in Loki's arms. For two minutes, she cried and the only thing that made her stop was the realization that she had been crying a lot lately, and it started to make her mad; she really needed some sleep.

"Why does that word make me feel like this?" She looked at Loki's worried face and saw the sadness behind his eyes. He hesitated, and she got up from the floor. She wiped her eyes and walked over to the bed to sit. Loki walked over to her and sat on the edge. She turned her body towards him and sat cross legged.

He reached over and tucked a stray lock of red hair behind her ear.

"Don't," she said. "Answer my question."

Unable to look at her, Loki instead looked to his hands. "That was the last thing you said to her, before you begged me to take your memory."

Confused, she asked him who.

"I can't tell you. You made me promise to make you never remember."

"That's a load of shit, why the hell would I tell you to do that. Where are the Avengers, did they put you up to this. Are they somehow trying to 'find Natasha'? Well she isn't here, and never was. She was just me undercover." As she said the words, she suddenly started to not believe them.

"The Avengers are not here. I left them as soon as I felt you leave the tower. I had to see if you were okay."

"Well clearly I am, so let's cut to the chase and just tell me. I have to meet James in a few hours."

"James? You do not need him, he has no answers for you." He was losing her. She was starting to get angry.

"He is the ONLY one who has answers for me. I need to know why I'm here, I need to know what I'm supposed to do." She was almost begging, feeling so lost.

"Natalia, he left. He was gone before you took down the Red Room."

"I did not take down the Red Room, it's impossible."

"You did it Natalia, and I helped you, but James was gone months before its collapse. Ivan shipped him off to another location and you never saw him again until he shot you last year when you were on a mission."

She thought for a little while. Confusion was becoming an old friend to her and she hated the feeling. "Malenkaya, you said it for a reason, why?"

Loki looked into her eyes again. "This is not you. You have not been this person for decades and I think if you go digging for the answers, you will destroy yourself. I will tell you, but tomorrow. I want you to think about this decision. You asked me to take the memories, and you never wanted me to return them. If I do, I know you will hate me, but you need to come back, Natasha has to come back. This is what you, Natasha would have wanted. She left Natalia behind a long time ago for a reason."

Natalia wasn't getting any answers and it was frustrating. "Leave."

"What?" Loki asked.

"I want you to leave, now."

He offered her a sad smile and respected her wish. He apparated back to Avengers Tower, having nowhere else to go.

After Loki left, Natalia didn't know how to feel. She really wanted to know what that memory was. And if Loki was telling her the truth, would she even want to remember it? Pondering her thoughts for another hour, it was time to meet James.

Arriving at the designated bench, she sat and scanned the area. It had been exactly three hours and James was due to meet her any moment, but would she get any answers? Did she still want to take down the Avengers with him? Or was getting that memory back more important at the moment. She didn't even know what to say to him. As she scanned the streets, she noticed the guy who had fallen on her earlier when he slipped her the note. He was standing with his back to an alley, looking straight at her, as if beckoning her to join him.

The moment she got up, he stepped into the shadows behind him. She bolted across the busy street and ran into the alley. Seeing no one, her eyes found the only door in the alley and decided to follow it since the man had no one else to go. She opened the door and found herself in the back of one of the shops. The man who owned the shop looked at her fearfully before turning his back to her. He had clearly allowed people back here before and chose to turn a blind eye, or was paid handsomely. She heard the steps creak to her right and found a staircase leading to another level. Climbing the stairs, Natalia found herself on the second level in a room with few furnishings; just a bed, dresser, and small table. In the corner, she saw a figure standing, and smiled when she saw light reflect off of his arm.

"Why are you here? Did Steve send you?"

"Steve? Why would Steve send me?"

James stepped from the shadows looking clearly confused. "Who else would it be? I know SHIELD didn't send you, I would have traced any communications. And HYDRA, well, they are a bit disorganized at the moment."

"I came by myself. I have questions." Neither of them moved, their bodies were tensed for a fight. The last one didn't end well, it ended with him shooting a bullet through her shoulder.

"And what questions would the infamous Natasha Romanoff have for me. If you are here to ask me to apologize for shooting you, you may as well leave now."

"Natasha Romanoff has no questions for you, Natalia Romanova does."

James's face lit up. "I haven't heard that name in decades, I know it…we know each other?"

"We trained together."

"I do not remember, HYDRA erased my memories. I've only recently been getting some back. Your name sounds familiar, but I do not remember you."

Horribly disappointed, Natasha smashed the table next to her. James didn't even flinch.

"I need answers and no one will give them to me! How am I supposed to take down the Avengers if I don't have help? They are too powerful. I need to know what happened to me the past few decades and why I was sent to destroy them!"

"Destroy them? Why?" James asked carefully.

Natalia looked him dead in the eyes, "I was sent to." She saw something shift in the clear orbs.

"Steve is with the Avengers," he stated.

"Yea, he is, and it was too easy to take him down. I just couldn't finish it though. I was hoping you would come back with me to finish the job."

Natalia didn't like what she saw, she knew that look all too well. It was the look he always had before he attacked her in their training.

"I won't let you take down the Avengers, I will never let you hurt Steve."

Natalia tensed her body again, and then reigned in her frustration. She knew a fight would not be won here, they were always perfectly matched. James seemed to realize it too, but he wanted to protect his friend. He now saw Natalia as the enemy.

"I will take them out with or without you," she simply said, and then backed out of the room.


	24. RR24 Succumbed

Ch 24 - Succumbed

Natalia was now on her own in this mission. James wouldn't help her, hell, he didn't even remember her. All she could do now would be to continue by herself. She made up her mind to go to Russia and find her old base before returning to New York to complete her mission. She was thinking that someone in the Red Room would contact her when it was all over. Being completely without intel on a mission was not new to her, but the fact that she had years of memory wiped made her confused. She needed some more information. If the base was indeed destroyed, maybe they put her name on the file as a red flag to investigate. Maybe they had left behind some information for her.

Could this be her final mission? She remembered Ivan talking about a successor after he leaves, is she going to be this successor if she completes this mission? She became giddy at the thought and started to formulate plans in her mind. She gathered supplies from around the town and used them to make traps around her room so that she could sleep without anyone catching her. James didn't seem too friendly towards her at the moment and she wouldn't put it past him to attack when her defenses were down.

Her dreams were plagued with nightmares. It was freezing cold, and her hands felt like ice. It was so white that she couldn't see anything. The wind was howling through the trees and she heard distant voices behind her, she was running from them. All she felt throughout her sleep was the bitter cold. She woke up physically freezing and even a shower couldn't warm her heart. She felt more rested, but her mind was even darker.

She fell back onto her bed after she changed and tried to work up the energy to get up and leave. She needed to make it to Russia soon, before the blizzards set in and made it even harder to navigate. A little later, Natalia disassembled the traps around her room and then left for the plane she came in on. She saw no more of James; he had probably moved on to the next town since his cover was blown.

**XXXXXX**

Back at the Avengers Tower, hours after Natalia had left, Loki apparated out of there and away from the team. He purposely waited so that he could give Natalia time to get away before the team figured anything out and went after her. She would have a few hours lead on them.

"What the hell Tony! I thought you had this lab locked down? How did he leave?" Clint was furious, as were the rest of the group.

Tony was looking flabbergasted. "I don't know! Something must have happened to the defenses!"

"Or maybe it was her…" Darcy said darkly.

"How could it be her?" Tony walked over to the computer and saw that they were the only souls in the building. "There's no way she could have gotten in, or out of here…" he trailed off as he looked at the air vent. "Shit."

Clint rushed a chair over and sat it underneath the vent. He popped open the screen and cursed to himself when he saw blood. He grabbed on to the sides and hoisted himself up into the vent to have a look around. He followed the trail and noticed that part of the wall was down where Natalia had disabled the wall with some hacking technology. He should have known that Natasha had it stashed up here for when they spied and played pranks on Tony. His hand landed on something small and metal when he went to turn back. He picked it up to discover it was a bullet. He found two more and held them in his hand as he made his way back to the team. Tony moved as Clint dropped from the vent.

"Damn it," was all Tony said as Clint showed him the bullets.

"She was here, but why didn't she do anything?" Darcy was concerned but not afraid.

Steve chipped in with "maybe she didn't want to try and take us all on while she was injured."

"My brother most likely sensed this and left as soon as he could. He is probably with her now. Not to worry though my friends, I do not think he wishes to harm her." Thor didn't seem too worried, but he was secretly hoping that this was the case.

"Well what do we do now?" Jane asked.

"We go after them and bring her back. I think the crystal in the band on her wrist is actually doing her harm. It was a long shot, but we need a new plan." Tony was the one being level headed here. He was responsible for all of this and felt that he had to fix it.

Clint rolled his eyes. "We don't even know where she went."

*sighhh* "I told you guys, she is going to Kazakhstan to find James." Darcy was annoyed with them. "The only thing is, I think she isn't planning on staying long. I think she wants to go back to where the Red Room was for answers. Our next step should be Russia."

"There is no 'our' Darcy," Jane said. "You are injured and you aren't going anywhere."

"She needs me! I saw Natasha in there. I know we can reach her. I think she has at least a little trust in me, I should be the one to talk to her to get her back here."

"Jane is right, Darcy. You need to stay here with her. It's too dangerous out there and if Bucky is involved, it could get a lot worse." Darcy glared at Steve and didn't agree with what he said. She said no more and accepted defeat.

Tony took charge again. "We should leave in a few hours. Grab what you want, rest, and meet on the roof in three hours. We head to Russia. Ohhh, and dress warm." He canceled the lockdown and everyone left for their rooms to pack. Jane helped Darcy to hers, and then went to see Thor off.

**XXXXXX**

Loki knew where Natalia was going. As soon as he felt it was safe, he left the tower and appeared in Kazakhstan. It would be a while before Natalia got here, but he wanted to make sure she made it safely. A while later, Loki sensed her and appeared a little ways from her. She was sitting on a bench, looking for someone. He guessed she was waiting to see James. Watching a man fall onto her from the crowd, he saw a note slipped into her jacket pocket. He guessed James had spotted her first, and made contact. Following her to a hotel room, he waited, outside of the room. She was in the shower and he didn't want to startle her. As soon as she was out though, he apparated in the room and the floor creaked under his sudden weight. There was a pause in sound from the bathroom, and he guessed that she had heard him. He then sat on the edge of the bed, but then thought better of it since she often turned violent when guests surprised her. He turned invisible and then she walked out of the bathroom with a dagger drawn. He had made the right choice.

"Malenkaya," he whispered behind her. He expected the dagger to fly towards him but he became visible, and barely had time to catch her in his arms before she collapsed in a fit of tears. She really was broken. He would have to tell her, and soon, before the crystal damaged her mind to much.

He talked with her for a little while before she forced him to leave. This saddened him, he only wanted to help, but her mind was too angry right now for him to tell her the truth. He noticed the crystal in the metal band flicker bright blue for only a moment, and this convinced him to wait. It was still too powerful in her system and was guiding her emotions to an anger he hadn't seen since he saw her all those years ago. Maybe he had made a mistake of bringing up the topic of the stolen memory the other week. He only wanted to see if his spell had held over the years.

**XXXXXX**

Loki focused on Tony, and apparated back to the team. Instead of landing in the tower, he found himself on a jet instead.

Clint jumped up, angry at him for leaving without a word. He grabbed onto Loki's collar and pushed him into the wall, gun drawn. "Where the hell did you go?"

Thor pulled Clint off of his brother and glared at him. "I went to find Natalia. She is okay by the way."

This grabbed Clint's attention; he was sure the god had run off. "Where was she?"

"Exactly where Darcy said she would be. I am to meet her tomorrow for an explanation."

"Explanation of what?" Steve asked.

"Of why I took her memory, and what that memory was. I'm going to give it back to her."

It was Tony's turn to get angry. "Why the hell would you do that now?"

Her crystal sparked. I saw it, it has a hold on her mind. Since we can't just pull it off, I'm hoping that the memory will bring her back."

"Why do you think this stupid memory will bring her back?" Clint asked.

"I felt Darcy's mind. I saw what she saw when she stabbed Natalia with that broken bottle. In a split second, I saw Natasha in there. Like Darcy saw, I think that the pain of the memory will bring her back, for good."

"But how will it affect Natasha?" Tony asked.

Loki only looked away. The team though all agreed that this is what she would have wanted. To hurt her friends would be devastating to her, but they had to act before Natalia killed them. The team settled in for the rest of the ride in silence, the atmosphere dark. When they finally landed, they made camp for the night in the heated jet.

When Natalia made it to her destination, it was midday already. She flew throughout the night and landed in a large field a few miles from where the base should be. It had started to snow harder as she got some rest in her jet. Only when she felt refreshed did she leave for the long walk. What she didn't know was that she had been followed. The sound of the snow storm muffled the footsteps of her follower.

The Avengers stayed in the plane too late, and got caught up in the snow storm. They would have to stay in the plane until Loki told them where Natalia was. This land was unfamiliar to them and they didn't want to be walking into danger. As soon as Loki felt Natalia land, he told the team she was here and then he left to find her.

Not too long after Loki left, the door to the jet was forced open. Clint drew his gun and Thor took up a position beside him. Steve stepped in front of Tony since his iron man suit wasn't on and he had a shield. To their surprise, Bucky Barnes stepped through the door with his arms raised in surrender. He looked like a mess.

**XXXXXXXX**

Natalia had only been walking for a few minutes when she sensed someone behind her. The wind was making a weird sound. It reminded her of snow whipping past the flag pole in her old compound. It was the sound of frozen ice on metal and she instantly knew who it was. She ducked when the sound grew louder. A metal arm swung over her head and she grabbed it and twisted until her attacker was on the ground. The angry face of James stared up at her before he grabbed her arm with his other hand and threw her off.

Not giving her a chance to recover, The Winter Soldier lunged for The Black Widow. She easily rolled out of his way but he expected that, and angled to where she would stop. Like in the training sessions in Red Room, she knew he would have expected her to do that so she pulled a dagger out of her boot and held it ready for him. It grazed his cheek as he danced away from it, and red dripped onto the snow. The sudden color in the white world distracted her and James landed a punch at her face and kicked her in the gut. It winded her, but she shot the knife forward again, and missed. He anticipated her attack but as the knife missed him, she kicked him in the face.

The two went at it for a few more minutes, neither of them gaining any headway. They both knew neither of them would win. It was only when James saw Loki appear that he backed off. He had heard about the man with intense green eyes and raven black hair. He knew he was a god and James doubted he could beat him. Bruised and bloodied, the attack stopped and the two separated.

Natalia smiled at his retreat. "Stay away from Steve and his team, I remember you now, and you were ruthless in killing," he said as he backed into the frozen forest. He disappeared into the white and left Natalia alone with Loki. She faced the god and raised her cut eyebrow at him. "Now what," she asked.

"Come on, I know a place we can talk," he said. Loki led the way and Natalia followed. She would finally be getting some answers.

**XXXXXX**

"Move and I'll shoot," Clint called out to Bucky. He had arrived at the plane shortly after his encounter with Natalia. He left to Russia before her, and when he landed his own jet, his radar picked up that the Avengers jet was already here. He thought that she must be going after them here in Russia, so he flew over to try and help them.

"I am not here to harm you, but to help."

Steve stepped out from behind Clint and Thor but kept his distance. "Bucky…"

"I'm not here to make friends," Bucky said as he stopped Steve from continuing.

Clint asked. "Then why are you here." He kept his gun drawn.

"Natalia, my old comrade came to me and said that she was going to take you all out. Steve saved my life last year, and I'm here to repay him. After this, I owe you all nothing, and I will leave."

Steve pushed Clint's gun down and turned to the team. "I believe him. Let him stay for now."

"So what are you all planning," the Winter Soldier asked.

**XXXXXX**

After an hour of walking through the frozen snow, Loki led them to a cave.

"I know this place," Natalia said. "The compound isn't too far from here. We should move before the blizzard really hits."

"Not yet, I need to show you. You do not need to go back to that place."

"Let's just do this later, we will be trapped in here if we don't leave now." Natalia had grown impatient.

"I know," Loki responded. "You need to deal with this here."

This caught Natalia's attention. She glanced around the cave that they used to meet in, and started to feel that sadness again. It completely replaced her anger and took over. She looked at Loki, and he placed his hands on both sides of her head. A green flash exploded from his hands and it all rushed back to her.

"No…" she cried out at the memory, but she succumbed to it.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

**Yayyy another chapter. The next one is the full memory! I was going to put it in this chapter but I wanted to spend a whole chapter on it so it will be next! I hope you like it! Thank you to all of my new followers and reviewers! You are the motivators!**


	25. RR25 Phase 2

RR25- Phase 2

The moment Loki used his powers to give Natalia her memory back, the force pushed them to their knees and Loki was unable to remove his hands from Natalia's head. They were frozen in pain as the memory came back, and from the crystal on Natalia's wrist. The crystal recognized a new power and latched on, which in turn created a power current. Natalia couldn't move as she was thrust back in time.

1953

Natalia was getting restless as her training got even more restricted. She needed to move, she was feeling sluggish and it was messing with her head. The constant checkups were annoying as well. They always put her under and she had no clue what kind of tests they would run. The guards around the compound were always watching her as if she were going to escape at any moment. They never caught her at night though, she was better than them. It also made her sad that James was gone. She guessed with her restricted schedule they no longer had a need for the assassin team, and he got shipped to another location. He was gone shortly after Ivan was seen yelling at him the day she got kicked in the stomach. Accidents happen, so that couldn't have been the reason he was gone so it had to be because of her. She hated to admit it but they had started to become friends. They were the greatest assassin team in the world.

As she was doing sit ups one morning, one of the guards entered her room and forcefully pulled her along to another appointment. She had tried resisting the last two times since she didn't know what was going on. It concerned her when they switched to batons rather than tasers to make her comply. She felt too weak to fight back, maybe her serum was wearing off and they needed to constantly test her levels? That was the only thing she could think of. The familiar gray walls bored her on the way to the lab. The lights cast off a dreary glow and she thought of the whole place as a dungeon, and she was the princess in the tower. Some princess she was, she couldn't even fight back to her tormentor, Ivan. That man seeped evil and there was something about him that made her listen to his every word.

The medical lab was just another cell. Knowing the routine, she shook off the guard and made her way to the exam table. Dr. Andrei along with Ivan came over and she felt the familiar needle slide into her arm. Staring defiantly at them, she slipped once again into unconsciousness. What felt like moments later, Natalia woke up and kept her eyes closed like she always did to survey her surroundings. The only thing she heard was a newspaper page being flipped and she knew it was the nurse who always led her back to her room. She sat up and steadied her dizziness when the nurse took her by the arm and helped her into her room. Once the nurse left, she groggily tried to create a plan to find out what was going on. Later that night, she would sneak into the lab. She had snuck around many places in the compound, but she steered clear of the lab, it was too dark and evil. This princess was going to find some answers; all she needed to do was avoid the dragon and his henchmen.

It was a cold walk back to the lab. It seemed so much different when the corridors were lit in the daytime; she had to rely on her senses in the darkness. She passed no souls on the way so she continued her path. Loki was supposed to come tonight, but she had to find out now. "Sorry my friend," she muttered, knowing that he wouldn't hear. She reached the lab and found it to be locked. It was no surprise, but she picked it just like any other and got it open in no time. Quietly closing the door, she flipped the light on and took a look around. It was spotless, as usual, but the smell was still the same. She couldn't describe it, but it was the smell of death and metal. She wondered if all dungeons smelled like that, familiar yet unexplainable.

Natalia made her way over to the filing cabinet in the corner. All of the drawers were locked but like the door to the lab, she forced them open. Leafing through the files, she found hers. She sat it on the table and sat to read through it. The only thing that stuck out in it was letters and a number written in pen on the inside cover of her file. It read 'BWp2exp.' She raised her eyebrows in question as she scanned over the info. Finding nothing else surprising, she picked it up to replace it and a key fell out that she hadn't noticed before. She picked it up and turned it over in her hand. It was a small key to a safe or something. She then scoured the room for evidence of a safe but found none, it must be in Ivan's office. She pocketed the key and went to put her file back.

When she placed it in its drawer, she noticed that it was shallower than the other four. Curious, she took the other files out and smiled when she saw what was in the back corner. Blending in with the color of the bottom of the drawer was a keyhole. Testing it with the key, it slid in like butter. She turned it and the whole bottom popped up. She lifted it out and found a hidden drawer that contained only one file which read 'BWp2exp.'

"Bingo." She whispered and sat in a chair to flip through it. What she found made her want to pass out.

Black Widow – Phase 2 Experiment

Natalia Alianova Romanova

a.k.a Black Widow

Simulation of Phase 2 Experiment has failed.

A lot of the pages went on like that, but when she found the good stuff, it wasn't so good.

Black Widow – Phase 2 Experiment

Natalia Alianova Romanova

a.k.a Black Widow

Simulation 27 of Phase 2 Experiment points to success. Must be field tested before proving true.

Black Widow – Phase 2 Experiment

Natalia Alianova Romanova

a.k.a Black Widow

Simulation 27 of Phase 2 Experiment proved successful. Proceed with caution.

Natalia then flipped to the back of the file to see exactly what Phase 2 was.

Black Widow – Phase 2 Experiment

Natalia Alianova Romanova

a.k.a Black Widow

The purpose of this experiment is to find out if the sterilization process can be overcome by the super serum. After many simulations, the experiment proved to be a success and the product will be the first of its kind.

When DNA from James Buchannan (weaponized soldier of HYDRA and RED ROOM), and Natalia Romanova were combined with a hybridized version composed of the super serum from both person's blood, the product was formed. The new serum was injected into Natalia 3 months prior to this report. Product appears to be healthy despite the fear of accidental abortion when a blow to Romanova's abdomen occurred. Training was halted and suspended until after product arrives.

Product will be taken from the mother upon birth, and various experiments run to find out if he/she portrays any trace of the serum in its system. If present, experiment will be repeated.

-Alexi P.

Natalia's hand flew to her stomach. She wasn't gaining weight due to restricted training; she was gaining weight because she was pregnant. It couldn't be possible! She went through the sterilization process when she graduated to the next level. But the serum, could it possibly have worked? It had to of, she had been so sick lately, and oh god, Loki was right. A few weeks ago when she stumbled from dizziness in the cave and he caught her, he said, "Natalia, are you pregnant?" She denied it since she didn't think it could be possible. She picked the file up from where it dropped to the ground in her surprise, and pictures fell out. They were ultrasound pictures, and she could see her baby as plain as day right there in the middle. Tears sprang to her eyes. She didn't know how to process the information. She shoved everything back into the file and back into the cabinet and ran back to her room. She spent the rest of the night trying to deny what she had saw, but it was no use. Her eyes kept flitting to her stomach and she started to wonder. _What will happen to it when it's born? _She then fell into a fitful sleep.

_A little girl sat by a fire in a warm living room with what looked like the parents behind her. The little girl was playing with a doll while her mother knitted and hummed a lullaby. The father sat reading a newspaper and seemed extremely nervous. His eyes kept flitting around the room and he jumped at every little sound. The mother in the room sensed his tension and told him to relax, but he never did. The little girl playing by the fireplace had no clue as to what her father was feeling. Before she knew it, she heard a loud bang at the front door and her mother scooped her up and ran up to the top floor of the house with the father close behind. Her father grabbed the crying girl from the arms of her mother and opened up a small door in the floor that she had no idea was there. He gently kissed her head and lowered her in, the mother following. The little girl was worried for her father, and for her doll she dropped in the doorway to the room._

_The father ran back down the stairs and opened the door to see who was there, there was no one. He was thinking it had to be Mr. Petrovich. He turned to go back up the stairs and that's when he noticed the dark figure sitting in his chair in front of the fireplace. Before he could let out a warning, the man shot him in the leg. He stumbled and fell but he made it back up the stairs to try and keep the man from harming his hidden family. It was no use, in a matter of seconds, the entire first floor burst into flames when the dark figure spilled kerosene all over the place and walked out of the door. He tried to yell for his wife to get their daughter out of there but a body fell onto his. Another man was in the house and had grabbed the mother when she emerged from the hiding place when she heard the gunshot. She left her daughter alone and was shot in the chest along the way. She made it to her husband before her legs gave out. Neither of them could move as the flames reached higher._

_The little girl stayed as long as she could in the trap door, but it soon became too hot. Not knowing what was going on, she opened the door with her little arms and saw flames licking at the room. She saw her doll in the doorway, covered in flames. She knew fire was bad when out of control, and if she didn't leave, she could be burned alive like her beloved doll. Running to the window, her small little hands wrenched it open and she leaped to the snowbank far below. She could hear the screams of her parents over the roaring of the flames. Her old life of love and happiness was now over._

Natalia didn't sleep a wink after the dream that night. She just knew it was how she ended up here. Ivan took her that night when he burned down her house. She could feel the love her parents had for her and it was a feeling she hadn't felt sense then. Could her hormones be bringing it back? Looking at her rounded stomach, she started to feel an inkling of that love again. The next morning, she decided to go for a walk in the courtyard to soothe her mind. As she breathed in the clean, cold air, it started to lightly snow. Ice covered the ground and the gray of the dead forest dampened her spirit. Deciding to head back in, she turned around and slipped on a patch of ice. She fell forward and almost instinctively protected her belly. She wasn't injured, but two guards ran to her side and radioed Dr. Andrei, alerting him to the incident. They then rushed her to the lab and Ivan was standing there next to Dr. Andrei looking concerned. The familiar needle came out as she was placed on the table and she caught Dr. Andrei's arm as he brought the needle closer.

She stared him dead in the eyes and said, "I know."

"Know what my dear? Release me so I can perform your checkup."

This time she looked at Ivan. "'BWp2exp.'" She took the key out of her pocket as she said it and threw it at him. Ivan bent to pick it up, and then looked at the file cabinet.

He walked closer to her. "My little spider, you weren't supposed to find out yet. I wouldn't want you to do anything drastic to the product."

The word 'product' made her angry. "Product? This isn't one of your 'products!' It's a baby, a live human being and you want to experiment on it before it's even in the world for a week?"

"My dear Natalia, if the 'baby' doesn't make it, we will just do the experiment again and again and again until it works. Do you know what this would mean? A whole army! You, Natalia will produce the greatest army alive if this works."

Natalia was horrified. She was going to be like a machine; she didn't want that, she didn't want her child to suffer either.

"You will not take this baby from me." She threatened.

"Oh really, we will see about that."

With that, he grabbed the needle from Dr. Andrei and plunged it into her arm. Before falling asleep she head Ivan say to Andrei, "we will have to find a way to keep her weaker so she doesn't escape."

She woke up on the exam table and her hand immediately flew to her stomach. The bump was still there so she relaxed. The nurse in the room raced over to her and guided her back to her room. The moment she sat on her bed, she vowed to not let anything happen to this child. She grabbed the doll from underneath her pillow and hugged it close. It reminded her of her doll she had as a child. She then realized that so many things become beautiful when you really look. _I wonder how many people I have looked at and never really seen?_

For the next month, Natalia was constantly guarded. She had zero chances to sneak away and see Loki. She only wondered what he thought happened to her. Every few night though, she would see the light in the sky where his portal would open. He never stopped waiting for her to show up. She would have to make an attempt to go see him as soon as the guards relaxed.

She talked back to Ivan today and was rewarded with a smack to the face. She gladly took it as well. He had the nerve to start calling the 'product' as his son. He even had names picked out. For a boy, he wanted the name Nikolai, which meant 'victorious' in Russian. For a daughter, her name was to be Vladlena, which meant 'to rule'.

She told him she would never call her child by that name, and it would never be known as 'his child'. She sat in her room mad at the world, her face still stinging. To her luck though, that night she was able to sneak out. The bitter cold bit at her bruised face as she bundled up and trekked to her and Loki's cave. She didn't know how much time she had to wait, but she left as soon as she could. Loki might not even be there yet. She was only there for five minutes when the familiar green eyes entered to her left.

"Natalia! Where have you been?" He ran to her and gave her a friendly hug.

Natalia opened her mouth to speak but she couldn't. Tears formed in her eyes and she unbuttoned her coat. Loki's eyes fell to her midsection and then he knew.

"Natalia, I am so sorry." He then just held her and let her cry. She then told him of Ivan's plans and it made him furious. He thought she had been pregnant, but she convinced him otherwise when she told him of the sterilization when she graduated.

Loki tried to come up with a plan. "I will work on my teleporting, and then I can get us both out of here. I can only do it by myself at the moment." He then started pacing.

"I can talk to Heimdall but no human is allowed on Asgard without permission from him or the king, the portal won't even open if Heimdall senses danger. He is all knowing. What if we just run?"

"We can't just run Loki, we are in the middle of nowhere and Ivan wouldn't stop until he found me. I'm too weak anyways, they are giving me something. It was hard just to get here and look, my face is still bruised, and it hasn't healed yet. I just don't know what to do."

The two tried to come up with a plan but nothing would come to them. After a little while, Natalia had to leave. She didn't want to be found missing if someone tried checking up on her.

Three months passed with no solution. Natalia could now feel the baby kick and she loved it. Loki was able to feel it the few times she escaped to see him. He thought it was so amazing, and he couldn't wait to see it if he was able to before it was taken away. One night while in the cave, Loki had a small fire going and they sat near, but not close to it. He knew she didn't like fire but he wanted to keep her warm.

"Ksenia." She said out loud.

"What?" Loki asked.

"Ksenia, what do you think about that name?"

"I think it's beautiful, how did you choose it?"

"I don't know, I've heard it before and have loved it ever since."

"Well I love it. What about a middle name?" Never in a hundred years did Loki think he would be listening to a human name her child. He was breaking every rule just to see her, but he didn't care. He still couldn't believe Heimdall opened the portal for him, he must have seen his soul where he meant no harm. She was his only friend who understood him.

Natalia thought for a few moments. "Elena, it means light. Ksenia Elena."

Loki smiled. "And for a boy?"

"It's a girl, I know it. If it is a boy though, Luka. It also means light. Either way he or she will be my light in this world." Her smile slipped away as she started to think about the future. She didn't know what it held with Ivan in it. She loved her unborn child with a love she felt from her parents. She hoped she could protect it from the horror she had went through.

The two talked some more and before they knew it, Natalia had to leave. Loki took it upon himself to walk her back to the compound so nothing would happen to her. In this part of the winter, the wolves were bad. She walked with wolves without fear, for the wolves knew that a lion was among them. Though they sensed that Natalia was dangerous, Loki still didn't trust Midgardian creatures. The people could be horrible enough.

The next day, she had another appointment. Ivan didn't want her to find out as soon as she did in case she did something bad to the baby, but she had found out at three months. He knew she wouldn't harm the baby now; she had grown attached and protective. He was so excited for it to be here. He grew excited at all of the things it would be able to do, if he could take it from her of course.

The next week, Natalia had to ensure her baby's safety; she had to make a deal with Ivan. Mustering up the courage, she left her room and headed to his office. She had only been in there a few times before and she always felt insecure in there. Before she reached the closed door, she heard voices. It was Ivan and Dr. Andrei talking together in the office. She came closer to listen in, there was no use barging in when she could just hear what they were saying from the door. She really didn't want to go in that room.

"They need to be separated," Ivan said.

"I thought that was the plan?" Andrei sounded confused.

"I mean they need to be separated before she goes into labor. I think she will do whatever she can to protect it, so this needs to be done. We can do it in a few weeks at her next checkup. This child will be momentous! I will make history!"

Natalia grew horrified. She backed away soundlessly from the door and rushed back to her room. She had to escape, and do it now. There was no way her child would be safe with this monster in this place. She refused to have it go through what she did, she would leave tonight. The princess was fleeing the castle.

It wasn't too hard to pack all of her stuff, she didn't have much. The only things in the duffel bag were a few pairs of clothes, the doll, and a blanket. To save room, she wore two pairs of clothes under her winter coat. Her snow boots were waterproof and had a space for her trusty knife. Within minutes, she was ready to go, but she had to wait for the cover of night fall. She looked out of the window to waste time and tried counting snowflakes. The white flurries soon became too immense to count as it started to snow harder. Many people would say that her view was gorgeous, and she had said that before, but when it is all you have to look at for years it starts to turn ugly. It was always gray from the trees that were dead from the cold or white when the forest was blanketed with the white death. Even the animals were white to blend in with the surroundings. That's why she loved the cave. The heat from the fires made sparse green vegetation grow. The frozen waterfall was blue, and when the light from the moon shone through it, the cave looked purple, and the orange of the fire made the ice shine like magic. She could only imagine what Asgard looked like. Loki described it as rainbow and gold. She would have loved to see it.

When the moon was at its highest point in the sky, she grabbed her bag and quietly snuck down the halls for what she hoped was the last time. Whatever drugs they had been giving her had made her weak, and she was soon out of breath. What felt like hours, she made it to the gap in the fence. Natalia couldn't believe that no one had found it as she squeezed her seven and a half month old belly through. She feared nothing on the journey to the cave except for her child's safety. As her adrenaline kicked in, the baby started kicking as if it sensed its mothers worry.

Natalia made it to her safe haven in only an hour and a half; she was slower this time due to the heavy snowfall. She sensed that Loki wasn't there before she even squeezed behind the ice wall. She set her bag down near the back wall and sat down wondering what to do. She needed to keep warm for the baby, but that would include making a fire. Maybe if she bundled up in all of her clothes? No, that was selfish; she had to think of someone else for the first time in her life. Her nerves were a mess as she piled up Loki's wood stash that he kept in the cave. Finding his fire starter, she striked it. The sudden sparks startled her as the heat warmed her hand. Abandonment filled her mind, she had felt abandoned when the fire took her home. Would this be how her child felt _if_ it ever grew up? Would she be there for it and be able to love it like her parents had loved her? She did not like the feeling and it made her stomach tie in knots. She tried again, this time anticipating the sparks, and angled them towards the dry wood and moss. It quickly caught fire and for the first time in her life, she smiled at the flame. She grabbed her blanket from her bag and layed in on the ground as she slept and warmed her body.

Sleep didn't last long when she felt a sharp pain in her abdomen. Bolting upright, she held her midsection. She sat frozen for a minute before lying back down to attempt sleep again. She only hoped the baby wasn't coming due to stress. An hour later though, she felt it again.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

**I thought about making this chapter super long, but the next one is going to be momentous. I want to especially thank **_**Avengergirl1306**_** for that amazing review. It made me feel so good about my writing and I thank you so much for that. I also want to thank my other reviewers for their kind words. I hope this chapter didn't kill it for everyone, but I put as many clues as I could about it in previous chapters without giving it away. Is this what you thought it was **_**sailorraven34**_**? Let me know what you guys think. The next chapter is going to be amazing and I promise you all will love it.**


	26. RR26 Embers

Ch 26- Embers

When Natalia felt the pain again, she knew something was wrong. It was intense and something she had never felt before. It radiated around her mid-section and it took everything in her to not cry out.

This continued on for another few hours. She started to get scared as she paced around the cave hoping for Loki to show up. Pretty soon though, her legs got too weak and she had to lay back down. The drugs in her system made her too weak and she had no idea what would happen. She curled into a ball and stared at the fire in hopes that it would distract her.

Through the crackling of the embers, she heard a different kind of sound. It was working its way to the cave like it knew where to go. She sighed in relief when Loki's name came to her mind but quickly grimaced again when another bout of pain shot through her stomach.

"Loki!" she called, but no one answered. It must have been an animal looking for shelter in the winter storm. She buried her face into her arm but then jumped at the sound of a voice.

"Natalia, are you okay?" She lifted her head and saw a man standing there with concern etched across his face. He kneeled down to her and she rolled over and tried sitting up.

Dr. Andrei saw the sweat pouring from the red heads face and he felt her head for a temperature.

"Natalia, your temperature is dangerously elevated, we need to cool you off."

Allowing him to help her, Dr. Andrei guided Natalia away from the fire and backed her against the wall for support. She grimaced in pain the whole way and she saw the worry on the doctor's face.

"What's going on, are you in pain?" She ignored the question and then caught her breath.

"What are you doing here? How did you find me?"

He sighed. "I've always known that you snuck out. Don't worry, Ivan doesn't know. I believed that you needed the exercise since he restricted your training. I worried about the injections weakening you too much, but Ivan demanded me keep giving them to you. I've had a spy follow you for the past few months. He said that you had been meeting with some man, but I didn't see any harm in that. Anyways, I noticed that you didn't come back tonight and I grew worried because of the storm. Ivan increased your dosage and I thought it might have caused problems. My spy lost you about halfway here in the snow and turned back since you always returned. I got here as fast as I could in the blizzard."

Natalia didn't know what to think. Had he always been looking out for her? He was always nice to her and made sure she was okay. Another wave of pain rocked her body and she curled into her knees with a moan.

"Let me look," Andrei said as he pushed her back up and undid her heavy coat. She allowed him to lift her shirt and then felt his cold hands on her. He pressed various painful areas and then cursed to himself.

"The baby is coming."

"What!? I'm almost 8 months, not 9! How could it be coming? Natalia grew terrified, she didn't know if she could trust this man.

"I know, and that worries me. It must be because of the injections and then the strain of getting here. Why in the world would you risk your lives to come out here?"

Natalia looked away from him and then noticed his medical bag by the fire. She breathed out in relief that he had something in there that could possibly help her.

Dr. Andrei followed her gaze and then got up to retrieve the medical bag. He saw her bag of belongings and quickly put two and two together, she wasn't planning on coming back. He grabbed the blanket and set it around her shoulders as she shivered against the cold. Her temperature seemed to have gone down some but she look extremely weak.

He felt around some more around her abdomen and then crossed his eyebrows in confusion. "How long have you been feeling like this?"

"About 5 or so hours I think," she coughed out. She started to panic when she saw his face fall.

"It should be further along than that," he mumbled to himself.

"Speak up doc, what's going on."

"I, I think your body is too weak to deliver this baby, and it has stopped the labor process."

She could almost hear her heart stop as he took out his stethoscope from his bag and pressed it into her belly. He shook his head and then took out a needle and syringe and pulled up a dose of something.

As he brought it towards her arm, she grabbed his hand and stared warningly at him.

"Not to worry, it is just something to help with the pain." Still glaring at him, she let him slip the sharp needled into her arm. She closed her eyes and quickly became relaxed, but she still felt pain, immense pain.

Her eyes shot open and she saw blood running down her side. She looked at Dr. Andrei and he had a surgical knife poised for another cut into her belly. Her arm raced to knock it from his hand, but her hand wouldn't move, in fact, she couldn't move anything but her eyes and head.

Dr. Andrei glanced up from his work and offered a weak smile. "I am sorry Natalia. If I don't bring Ivan this baby, he will kill me and my family. My time is almost up…"

Natalia's eyes spilled with tears as she realized what was going on. Ivan knew about her leaving and he was curious to see where she was going. He allowed her to sneak out, and he sent Andrei to take the baby when she didn't return. The injection Dr. Andrei just gave her was a paralytic, not a pain killer.

"Forgive me, but I fear Ivan more than I fear you. I am to meet a guard detail halfway back with the child and then a team will come and get you. You will both be okay, Ivan has assured me your safety."

All Natalia could do was feel the pain and cry. She couldn't move and she couldn't watch. After another minute or two, she felt the tugging stop. She looked back over and Dr. Andrei had a small object wrapped in a blanket. Her eyes followed it as Dr. Andrei smiled at the bundle and placed it in his coat for warmth. Through the sound of crackling embers and the gusting of the wind outside of the cave, she heard the most beautiful sound in the world. She looked at the bulge in Dr. Andrei's coat as small cries erupted from it.

Dr. Andrei stitched Natalia back together as she desperately tried to gesture for him to let her see her baby. She felt so frustrated that she couldn't move. When Dr. Andrei was finished, he placed a thick gauze pad over the incision and pulled her now bloodied shirt back down. While cradling the bundle under his coat, he packed his things and went to leave.

Fury built inside of Natalia's chest as she watched Dr. Andrei leave with her baby. She hadn't even got to see it yet. All she could do was lie there in a pool of blood as her anger built and eventually spilled over. When she heard her baby's crying finally go quiet when they got too far away, something snapped inside of her. She felt strength flood back into her body and she felt herself growing stronger. Latching onto her emotions, she embraced her anger and let it carry her. She felt the feeling come back into her body and she slowly started to stand up. She hobbled past the fire and had to lean against the ice wall for support. The wind blew towards her now and she could have sworn she heard the baby again. Thinking of that sound, she ripped the gauze pad off of her stomach and to her surprise, it had dramatically healed, though it was still bleeding immensely. She bundled her coat around her and then stepped into the blizzard to get her baby back.

Not even the wolves howled as the storm raged on. Natalia picked up her pace, leaving a bloody trail in her wake. She didn't slow down for anything, and only fell twice in her dizziness. The wind died down some and then she heard it again, a cry. She started sprinting, ignoring her pain and raced to the sound. She found them just as the wind picked up again and she grabbed Dr. Andrei in a headlock. She forced him to the ground on his knees and choked the life out of him. She wanted to beat him so badly, but she didn't want to risk injuring the baby.

He finally went limp and she lowered him down to the ground on his back. She ripped open his coat and found what she was looking for, her daughter. Carefully picking her up, the baby opened her eyes and they were the most beautiful color she had ever seen. Her eyes were a beautiful purple lilac.

The baby then started crying again from the cold and Natalia shook off her coat and wrapped her in it.

"Ksenia," she said sweetly as she cradled the bundle close. She then started walking back the way she came. If a detail was indeed halfway, they would catch her. She had no choice but to try and run. She got no more than 20 feet away when she felt two bullets pierce her body.

One bit into her back as the other went into her leg. She fell to the ground, protecting Ksenia as she fell. She reached one hand to her leg to stop the bleeding, she had lost too much blood today. A figure then started walking towards her, it was Dr. Andrei, alive. He had the gun drawn and pointed right at her. It seemed as if he didn't want to kill her since they may need her if the experiment didn't work. It was then she remembered her knife in her boot.

As another large gust of wind tossed snow into the air, Dr. Andrei tried to shield his face from the sharpness of the ice. In that moment, she reached into her boot and drew the knife. She aimed and threw it as hard as she could manage in her weakened state. He didn't even see it coming, especially since it pierced his left eye and lodged deep into his brain, killing him instantly. More red littered the white snow and it made Natalia's stomach roll.

She pulled herself up, focusing again on her anger which seemed to make her stronger, though only slightly. She had to get to safety, the guard detail would have heard the gunshots. Picking up her pace, she made her way back towards the cave, and then passed it. The spy would think to look there first and surely find them.

Natalia kept a steady pace and couldn't help but keep checking on her daughter wrapped up in the coat in her arms. She was tiny and looked so fragile. Tears sprung into her eyes at the thought of not being able to protect her. She had only known her for a short time and was already in love, a feeling she never thought she could possess. After a short while, Natalia's adrenaline ran out and her senses were dulled and taken over by pain. She noticed that her stomach had healed more, but was still bleeding. Her new gunshot wounds though hadn't healed much at all and it scared Natalia. What would happen if she collapsed? Ksenia would be all alone and surely die.

The wind got harder and she sensed the detail tracking her. She couldn't hear them, but she felt them in a way. She needed to find shelter. As if answering her prayer, the wind stopped blowing snow around for just a few moments and she was able to spot a small cave up ahead. She rushed to it and ducked in to shelter from the now full force blizzard. She knew Ivan, and he would not stop until they were found.

There was nothing in the cave that would prove useful to her, but at least it faced away from the wind. She curled into a ball with Ksenia at her center, trying to keep the baby warm. She could hear fitful cries and even small coughs from her. Natalia uncovered the baby's face and blew her warm breath onto her tiny face. Her little lips were a bluish color from the cold, and Natalia cried because she couldn't keep her child warm.

Natalia must have dozed off because the next thing she knew, there was a guard in the cave with her and he had a taser drawn at her. Pushing Ksenia out of the way, she summoned what little strength she had left and lunged at the man, snapping his neck in less than a second. From the look of him, it looked like he was trying to shelter from the storm, but if he was here, that meant more guards were near. She couldn't leave though, she had no more energy and they wouldn't make it out there.

She pulled the dead man to the back of the small cave and then placed Ksenia between them. It was the only way she could think of to keep her warm. The baby was still coughing though, and it worried the new mother to no end.

As mother and daughter sheltered in the small cave, they were being sought for. One man in particular was determined to find them. He found the cave not too long ago, and saw the large amount of blood. This worried him, Natalia must have given birth, but something happened them. The man then closed his eyes and tried to apparate to where he felt Natalia. He was still unpracticed with this, but he found her and appeared in a small cave. He saw a man with a red head between him and the wall and in anger, raced forward and hurled the man away from her. He was surprised when the man was found to be dead.

Natalia then pulled a bundle close to her and glared defiantly at him. Her eyes softened when she realized it was Loki. Loki kneeled before her and gathered the woman into his arms. She was extremely pale and covered in blood. She didn't even have a coat on. He looked at the coat in her arms and then heard the cry of a baby. She allowed him to pull the top part up and he was able to see the baby girl, but she looked cold, Natalia did too.

"Natalia, we have to get you out of here. I feel people closing in on us." He started to pull her up but she pulled back. He looked at her questioningly and she then pushed her daughter into his arms.

"Take Ksenia somewhere safe," she whispered.

"No, Natalia. I'm not leaving you here." The desperation in his eyes pleaded with her to get up; but she couldn't.

She pulled her hand away from the baby and then curled back into a ball, ignoring Loki's pleas to get up.

He didn't want to leave her, but he had to. There was no chance Heimdall would open a portal for her, but an innocent baby he might.

"I'm coming back for you, I promise." With that, he backed out of the cave and ran a short distance with the bundled up baby in his arms. He didn't want the portal to attract the guards, like they could see it in this storm anyways.

"Heimdall!" he yelled into the white sky. It took a few moments, but the portal opened. Loki was transported to Asgard with Ksenia. Within moments, he appeared in front of Heimdall. He had a scowl on his face but he couldn't turn away an innocent baby.

Loki ran past the guardian and across the bridge into the Asgardian night. He hoped his body heat would warm the baby as he ran. He wasn't sure where to leave Ksenia at this time of night, so he made a split decision. A few minutes later, he was knocking on the chamber door.

"Loki! What are you doing at my chambers?"

"I am sorry Lady Sif," he apologized as he pushed passed her.

"Excuse me, that is not gentlemen like! Do you have any idea what time it …" Her words trailed off as she heard the baby cry. She became tense and looked at Loki accusingly.

"Where did that come from Loki, where did you get it? Is it yours?"

"Sif no! She is not mine but she is in danger. I need you to care for her until I return. She is very sick."

Lady Sif's eyes softened when she heard the tiny coughs come from the bundle in her friend's arms. She walked forward and uncovered the baby. She gasped when she saw the most brilliant shade of lilac she had ever seen look up at her. She then took the baby out of the cold coat and rushed to her bed. She grabbed a golden blanket from it and re wrapped the little girl.

"I'll look after her Loki, but she needs her mother." The relief she saw in Loki's eyes convinced her that he was trying to do the right thing.

"Thank you Sif, her name is Ksenia." He then turned and ran from the room back to where he came. He had to get back to Natalia before they found her.

The moment Loki left, Sif knew she had to get this baby some help. She cradled her close before laying her on the bed while she changed. She was only in her gown and not appropriate to be running around the kingdom in. As fast as she could, she got back to the baby and rushed her to the healers. There always seemed to be healers awake at all hours of the night and she found one in just a few minutes.

"Excuse me, this child is in need of dire help, she is coughing and only a few hours old." Since Sif was a high ranking member of Asgard, the healer did not ask where the child came from. She took Ksenia from Lady Sif's arms and laid her on the warm stone table to examine. Even the healer gasped at the beautiful eyes. Using her abilities, she scanned over the baby to try and find a problem. In a matter of seconds, the healer froze.

"This child is of Midgard!"

Sif was unaware of this fact, but she had vowed to protect her. She pretended she knew.

"I know healer, can you help her?"

The healer looked down at the helpless bundle and shook her head. "I cannot, she is Midgardian and no healer's powers can help." The healer bundled her back up and handed her to Sif. Sif cradled Ksenia to her chest as the healer spoke.

"From what I can tell by looking and listening to her though, she has an infection in her lungs, most likely from being in the cold too long. There is nothing anyone can do, not even Midgardian healers." The healer was sympathetic, and she told the truth.

"Tell no one of this visit," Sif said as she left with the child.

When Loki made it back to Natalia's cave, she was gone, and Loki only thought of the worse. She would get her back, wherever she was.


	27. RR27 Adrenaline

Ch 27- Adrenaline

Not even 5 minutes after Loki left, another guard entered the cave and found Natalia. He immediately exited and fired three shots into the air to alert the rest of his team. Within a few minutes, there were three of them gathered around the entrance.

"Here's the plan, she looked pretty knocked out in there, I think we can just tie her up and carry her to the truck." The lead guard was trying to think of a way to get the assassin out of there. She looked beat to hell and she didn't even look at him when he entered the first time.

"Sounds good boss, but no lethal force right?"

"Exactly. I don't know if she had the baby or not, but if it didn't make it, Natalia is our top priority. Ivan wants her back alive no matter what. You all got that?"

The team shook their heads and hurried into the cave. All three of them rushed her at once and she didn't even fight back. They tied her hands and feet together and left her on the floor of the cave for a moment in bewilderment.

"Uhhh boss, she didn't fight back and we aren't dead yet. Is she even still alive?"

"Of course she's alive, she's the Black Widow!"

The guard that spoke leaned to the ground to assess the situation. He took off his glove and placed his fingers at her neck.

"Shit, her pulse is weak, I could barely feel it. Dr. Andrei is dead meat now if he did this to her. He could never handle a gun and he wanted that baby more than Ivan."

"She's still pregnant?"

The guard, feeling more at ease in the assassin's presence, undid her bulky shirt and the teams faces turned white.

"Fuck! Andrei cut it out of her! He must have ran off with it. She looks bad, we need to get her out of here."

The lead guard bent down and picked up the bloodied and unconscious girl. He carried her bridal style and she didn't even stir. Another guard took off his top coat and tucked it around her.

"Rafe, go try and find the truck to bring it closer. This blizzard is getting worse."

"Got it boss." With that, he hurried off.

"Mikhail, take the lead and make sure we don't walk over any cliffs."

"Yes sir." Mikhail took the lead and Adrik, the team leader followed with Natalia in his arms.

About 10 hard minutes into the walk, Adrik felt really warm. He was confused since Natalia was ice cold, as well as he.

"What the hell? Mikhail, wait up for a moment." Adrik lowered the woman to the ground as his partner met them.

"Damn it she's bleeding out! Give me your coat Mik!"

The front of Adrik's shirt was coated with wet red blood. Natalia's wounds would no longer heal in her weakened state and they had opened up again. Adrik grabbed the coat and ripped it into long strips. Mikhail helped him tie them around her wounds in an attempt to get the bleeding to stop.

"Is she still breathing?"

"Yea, barely. Where is Rafe with the truck!?"

"I think it's close, come on, we got get her to the warmth. If she dies, we die."

Within 10 more minutes of trudging through the snow, they saw the truck lights heading for them. Mikhail lit a flare to alert Rafe to their presence and the truck drove faster.

When they got her into the back of the truck, they threw blankets on her and surrounded her with warmed canteens of water. She showed no improvement and it started to worry the men. The weird flash of green light outside the truck worried them also, but they found nothing upon investigation.

Adrik, the leader then took a couple of syringes out of a box in the truck and studied it.

"Adrik, what is that?"

"Ivan has these on every truck that goes with Natalia on missions, it's shots of adrenaline. He said to never use it unless she was on deaths doorstep and Dr. Andrei was here. She's not dead yet, and Andrei isn't here."

"Let's just use it now! He won't know."

Adrik shot him a death glare. The instructions were clear. If you would like to betray Ivan, go right ahead." He offered the syringe to Rafe but he didn't take it.

"Mikhail, get us back, she's almost gone."

They rode back in silence and Rafe couldn't stop looking at the dying girl. He could almost bet that no one had looked at The Black Widow for this long without getting killed. She was beautiful and looked like a porcelain doll who would break at the slightest touch. He felt bad for her having the baby taken away, but it was worth it. He would get played handsomely for Natalia's return.

The truck started to veer off of the icy road when they were not far from the compound. It slid into a snow bank and came to a rest. The two men in the back of the truck had no clue what was going on. They hopped out of the back of the truck and went to the front to investigate.

What they found was Mikhail, with a dagger through his temple. They ran back to the back of the truck and climbed in to protect Natalia from whoever got their teammate. As soon as they entered though, they saw a raven haired man plunge the syringe full of adrenaline straight into Natalia's heart.

XXXXXX

Loki plunged the needle straight into her chest and waited. The two remaining guards were taken out by a flash if green from Loki. He couldn't be bothered to take his eyes off of Natalia's face as he killed the guards. He had never taken a human life before but he couldn't think about that now.

After untying her and a minute of waiting, nothing happened. Natalia was still near death and he had to get her out of here. The front of the truck was starting to smoke and it was only a matter of time before it caught fire and alerted more guards from the compound.

Thinking of no other option, he scooped the girl up into his arms and carried her gently out of the back. He stepped over the bodies of Rafe and Adrik, and headed towards the compound. He would have to find a way to sneak in, there was no way Natalia would survive out here. He only hoped he made it there before anyone found them and took her away from him.

Relief flooded the god's body when he felt Natalia stir in his arms. Loki immediately ducked under a low hanging tree and sat with her laying in his lap with her head against his chest. With his every heartbeat, he hoped she would hear it and come back to him. He had fallen for this human girl and he would not let her be taken away from him.

He cupped her face with his hand and tried to reach her mind. He felt her there, struggling to wake up. He reached for the light he felt but it was just out of grasp.

"Come on Natalia. I can't reach any further, and you can't stay in there, alright? You need to come back. Whatever our souls are made of, yours and mine are the same, I can feel it."

The red head stirred some more, color rushing back into her face. Her eyes eventually opened and when she realized who she was with, she smiled.

"Loki…" her face then twisted into pain. "It hurts," she whispered.

"That's the thing about pain Natalia, it demands to be felt. Now feel it and get up, we have to go. I can't lose you to them again."

He was the rock in her chaos that the rest of the world splashed off. He had helped her become the person she is today. Through their meetings in the cave, they both found themselves in each other.

Natalia took a deep breath and tried to sit up. She groaned in pain but something started to feel different.

"Ksenia, where is she!" She demanded.

"She's okay. I brought her to a friend who is looking after her. Ivan can't reach her."

"Ivan." Fury radiated through her body. He was the reason she was in this mess. With him in the world, no one was safe. He was a monster and had to be stopped. It was the only way she would be able to live in peace with her daughter.

"Take me to her, please."

Loki looked distraught. "I can't, she is on Asgard and you know I can't bring you there."

Natalia heard something in his voice, something sad.

"What is it you are not telling me Loki?"

"I'm sure it's nothing, but I think Ksenia is sick. I am sure Lady Sif will care for her though."

Sadness ripped through her heart. Her fury only intensified at this and to Loki's disbelief, she shakily stood up.

"I'm going to kill Ivan," she said matter of factly.

"The hell you are," a third voice chimed in from the snow. A man walked forward with his gun drawn, a second man close behind. Shots started firing and Loki leaped in front of Natalia. He took a bullet to the shoulder but shook it off and fired his own energy back at them. The two men dropped to the snow, dead.

More gun fire erupted around them and Loki told Natalia to run while he held them off. She went as fast as she could, but it was no run. She limped and staggered but gradually became stronger as she felt her back beginning to heal. The adrenaline had started to do its job of accelerating the serum in her body. She didn't stop until she heard the gunfire stop. It was only when she looked back she heard a familiar cracking sound.

She couldn't pinpoint the direction through the blinding now, but soon found it. It had come from in front of her, and she had been shot, again. It was a taser though this time and she didn't lose consciousness, but she fell into the snow, facing the evil white sky. Turning her head, she saw seven men begin to surround her, tasers drawn.

"Don't kill her! Ivan needs her alive!" This was all she heard before she attempted to roll over. At the attempt, the guards took it as an attack and quickly tased her again. Though she was healing, the constant barrage of new wounds slowed the healing process and made her weaker in her already weakened state.

XXXXXX

After telling Natalia to run, Loki fought off the remaining guards with ease. They fired guns at him but he dodged them. He was now glad he was forced to go to training with Thor. His shoulder hurt from a bullet, but he didn't mind the pain as long as Natalia got away.

After taking the men down, he raced in the direction Natalia had staggered off in. He heard voices not too far ahead and quickly found that Natalia was down with at least 7 or 8 guards surrounding her. Getting angry, he ran at them and began to fight his way towards Natalia.

He grabbed some from behind and pulled up, breaking their spines. Others, he kicked in the head and snapped their necks. He was clearly more skilled than they were, possibly because he had decades worth of training. He knew their moves before they were going to make them. He didn't care for hand to hand combat, but it was more efficient than using his powers and alerting more guards.

When they were all dead, he rushed over to his red headed friend.

"Natalia, are you okay?"

"If I get hurt one more time, I'm going to rip off each finger from each assailant and shove them down their throats."

Loki smiled at her remark and tried to help her sit up.

"I can't, I don't have enough energy Loki. Let me rest for a moment." Her wounds were still bleeding and the shock from the tasers affected her central nervous system. She couldn't control her movements at the moment.

"There is no time for rest. Guards are all over the place. The fire from the truck must have alerted them to something being wrong. Come on." He scooped her up again and ran with her as gunfire erupted around them once again. He was running for his life.

While they ran, Loki couldn't help but wonder how much a human could bleed until they died. Natalia had lost and was losing so much blood. His clothing was already stained from it, not to mention his own wound. She could hardly hang onto him as they escaped.

When they made it to the end of a tree line, a figure stepped into the clearing.

"Where is it!?" He demanded. It was Ivan. He had joined in on the search to get his prize experiment back.

Loki slowed to a complete stop a few meters in front of him and eyed him warily. It seemed as if the news of Natalia no longer pregnant had reached him and he was demanding to know where the baby was.

Loki lowered Natalia to the ground and stepped in front of her to shield her from whatever Ivan was going to do.

"I'm not going to hurt her. I need her though. Hand her over and you may leave with your life." Ivan gave him a chance to leave, but Loki didn't take it.

"Fine," Ivan said as he raised his gun. He fired it straight into the raven haired man's heart, but the man didn't even falter. Instead, he smiled. So, Ivan fired a few more shots into the man and again, it didn't faze him.

Confusion swept across Ivan's face when the man as well as Natalia suddenly disappeared into thin air.


	28. RR28 Shades of Crimson

Chapter 28 – Shades of Crimson

(_Seconds before the encounter with Ivan_)

As soon as Loki sensed an evil presence ahead of him, he ducked down behind the tree line with Natalia. He then astral projected both of their figures out into the open. He was losing energy fast, but he saw no other way since Ivan was coming in their direction. He still didn't have the energy to get them both out of there with his powers since he was so unpracticed, but this plan was working.

He watched as Ivan offered him escape. He checked on Natalia and thought of what to do next. Ivan was in their way and they needed to get past him. Natalia needed rest and the constant barrage of wounds and emotions were taking its toll. Then he remembered the second syringe of adrenaline in his pocket. It might be able to help Natalia but he debated on whether or not to use it yet since she was slowly recovering. They were not out of danger yet and needed to keep moving, he would think more about it later.

(_Present_)

Natalia watched as Loki left her to distract Ivan. The feeling was coming back into her body after being tased and she could feel it all now. It hurt like hell but to get past it all she thought about was what she planned on doing to Ivan.

Her recovering body had warmed up and the snow that landed on her skin and wet clothes had started to melt. She watched in fascination as it ran off of her body and mixed with the wet snow around her. Just a drop of blood seemed to expand in the slush and pretty soon it looked like a sea of blood. She couldn't believe that it had all come from her but there was no one else around.

Her mind started to wander as she thought about her past victims. Waves of regret washed over her and she wanted to feel the pain that she had made them endure. She thought it made her feel happy when she completed a mission for Ivan, but did it really? She couldn't remember ever feeling truly happy. Maybe for just a few moments in the frames of time with Loki.

Loki. He had come into her life so unexpectedly and saved her from her own misery. All she ever did to pay him back was to drag him back to Earth to possibly be killed by Ivan's henchmen. She was the reason James left, she was the reason most of the world leaders were afraid to shut their eyes at night, she was the reason Ksenia was in so much danger. The world would be so much better off without her, but first, Ivan needed to pay. Loki and Ksenia wouldn't be in any more danger when she and Ivan were gone. She only hoped that Loki would look after her.

Tears sprang to her eyes as she stood up to stumble away. Ivan was no longer in the clearing and that meant Loki would be back soon. She looked at the sea of washed off blood all over the ground and couldn't help but see the bodies of the comrades she had killed. Ivan was going to pay and he was going to pay now.

XXXXXX

As soon as Loki had left Natalia, he snuck around to the left side of the clearing where he watched the exchange between Ivan and their astral selves. He then looked around for something to pull Ivan away but all he saw was white and gray. Cursing himself, he dug into the freezing snow but quickly found that it really didn't bother him, it was just the thought of digging around in the wet mush. The blood from Natalia on his hands mixed in with the snow and turned it a sickly shade of crimson.

His knuckle scraped against something rough and he grabbed at it; it was a large stone.

"Great, I'm a feared Asgardian warrior with a mighty rock. Oh how Thor would mock me," he mumbled.

His head whipped up when he heard the gunshot. Ivan had tried shooting who he thought was Loki through the heart. Loki made his astral self smile at the mad man and it infuriated as well as confused Ivan. Ivan fired a few more shots and then stared in wonder when the spell broke and the projections of Loki and Natalia disappeared.

Loki panicked when his spell broke. Ivan would continue forward and find the real Natalia at any moment. Ivan was spinning around trying to figure out where they had went while Loki tried to figure out what to do. He then thought of the stone in his hand and prepared to throw it, hoping Ivan would hear it through the wind. Thinking he wouldn't, he hurled it at the dead bush beside him. It made a loud crashing sound and he then crawled back a few paces and hid behind a cluster of trees.

The plan worked though as Ivan charged towards the sound. Loki saw the man smile when he saw the blood that had washed from his hands when he found the rock in the snow. Ivan was sure it belonged to Natalia and he headed straight, away from Loki. Sighing in relief, Loki turned and made his way back to where he left Natalia.

The strong scent of blood hit his nose when he made it to the spot where he left her. There was a large amount of blood mixed with the snow. He could only think that someone had gotten to Natalia since she was nowhere in sight. As a million horrifying things ran through his head, he didn't hear the footsteps behind him.

"I'm sorry," a sweet voice whispered behind him before he felt something hard hit the back of his head. He fell into the bloody snow and was immediately knocked out.

XXXXXX

Natalia felt horrible for knocking Loki out but he would have followed her and gotten hurt. She kneeled beside him and planted a kiss to his forehead. Feeling something in his coat pocket, she reached in and pulled out the syringe. It looked different from what she could remember before when Dr. Andrei somewhat explained it to her. This one was red, she could have sworn that the other one was blue. Her mind was probably playing tricks on her. Natalia smiled to herself anyways as she tucked it into her waistband and left.

Following the direction she thought Ivan went in, she guessed he was headed back towards the compound. She hadn't been in this part of the forest before but she knew how to navigate, even though the blinding snow. She guessed that they had overshot the compound and were approaching it from the opposite side.

Her guess proved correct when she finally made it. There were almost no guards from what she could see. They were probably all out looking for her and the baby. A longing pain went through her chest as she thought about Ksenia. The stony grey compound looked almost ghostly as it stood out in the night. The courtyard was barren and the caravan of trucks were no longer parked in their spots. The five story building looked small but what the average person didn't know was that it went stories underground and expanded underneath.

Ivan proved to be nowhere in sight as she snuck up a tree next the fence. Her whole body trembled as she grabbed each branch to hoist herself up. When she made it high enough, she jumped from her perch and sailed over the compound fence. No even bothering to land gracefully, she let her legs buckle underneath her and layed in the snow for a few moments.

"Get up," a voice said. There was no one around but she could have sworn she heard it.

"Get up." Natalia sat up quickly and cringed when the movement hurt her head. She definitely heard something. She looked around and to her amazement, she saw people.

"Get up," the people said in unison. Natalia looked harder and saw that they were not ordinary people, they were her fallen comrades that she was forced to kill.

Tears sprang to her eyes as the ghostly figures urged her to get up and avenge them. She took comfort in the thought that they forgave her, and that it was all Ivan's fault.

Shakily standing up, she tucked her hand into her pocket and pulled out the syringe stolen from Loki. Without a second thought, she plunged it straight into her chest, right into her heart. The effects from the injection were almost immediate. The ghostly figures blew away with the snow and the pain in her body left with them.

She felt so much adrenaline that her body didn't know what to do with itself. She let herself stretch and then took off in a full run towards the door to the compound. Upon finding it locked, she kicked the handle off and let herself into the torch lit hallway. The storm must have knocked the lights out.

Wet footprints led the way down the hall and she knew it was Ivan who had left them. Ivan was a smart man; he must have known he was being followed since he was never that sloppy. He knew she was here and she hoped he was afraid.

Hearing every sound and vibration as she hurried through the halls down to the lower levels, she pinpointed Ivan to be in the training room. When she reached the room, she found it open and lit with torches. It looked very medieval, especially with a figure standing in the middle of the room casting an eerie shadow through the doorway.

No words were exchanged as she entered and closed the door behind her. He knew she was there to kill him, and she knew he wouldn't make it easy.

As each body looked for a weakness, it was a creak in the floors that distracted Ivan. Natalia took this distraction as her advantage and lunged forward, slamming her foot into his knee and forcing it the wrong way. Ivan fell to the ground with an angry yell as he clutched his broken knee.

"Never lose focus," Natalia taunted just as he had that day in the training room with James when she got kicked in the stomach.

Ivan looked angry. He grabbed his knee, popped it back in the right spot, and stood up with no problem. It was due to the adrenaline that she heard the sound of skin, bone, and tissues repairing at an inhuman rate. The confused look on her face prompted Ivan to answer.

"They called the serum an 0-8-4, or, an object of unknown origin."

"What are you talking about?" Natalia countered.

"The super serum." They started to circle each other as Ivan continued. "It was given to me by a friend who owed me a favor. He said it was the only one in existence and after I was injected, I could do amazing things."

As he ended on that word, he struck forward and knocked Natalia off her feet and into the wall several yards behind her. The impact made the wall crack and pissed Natalia off. She felt healed after that last injection and it packed a punch. She shot back and faked a kick to the head, instead using her leg to sweep him off of his feet. He landed with a thud but quickly recovered.

"If it was the only one in existence, how did you inject me with it?" she asked.

"Dr. Andrei is a very smart man my child…"

"_Was_ a smart man," she interrupted.

"Was? He is supposed to have the baby with him. Is that why you tracked me here? To see where he had taken her?"

The word 'baby' shot fury through her body and she attacked Ivan once more. She used all of her strength to hit him in the head. He blocked most of the blows but the sheer force broke his wrist and arm. Before he could recover from the shock she struck a blow to his sternum, hearing it crack. It wasn't enough to kill him, but she bet it hurt like hell.

"He doesn't have her, she is gone and will never walk this earth. Now answer my question."

The confusion was enough to make him stutter. "But what…?"

"The question, Ivan." She said through gritted teeth.

"My blood. Dr. Andrei isolated the serum I was injected with to make a new one. Unfortunately, it has worn off on me over the years. I'm very old you see, I lost track around 114. And I assume you took the adrenaline shots since you looked half dead earlier. They were made from your blood and enhanced in case you were injured too badly in the field."

"How many more are there!"

"There is no more serum, only the adrenaline compounds. There are four trucks with two syringes each so that makes four. The other paired syringes are enhancers incase the first one failed. If you took both, then that leaves 3 compounds with 3 enhancers. Now, what happened to my child!?"

He hit Natalia in the chest as she was thinking about what he said. She caught her balance but another kick sent her into the door, breaking the glass in its window. Her hand gripped a large shard and she shot up like a bullet and caught Ivan on the wrist with the glass.

Blood poured from his veins but he didn't let that slow him down. He caught her hand as it came towards him again and used the leverage against her, making her stab herself in the stomach.

"I've lost too much blood today, you will never take any more of it!" She wrenched the shard out and caught him across the cheek. She dodged a fist to her face and then rolled to the side as she sent a spin kick. She popped up and caught him in a headlock, prepared to end his life.

"She is not your child, she's mine," she said through gritted teeth.

Through all of the fighting, the rest of the dried blood on her body became heated and runny again. It made the grip on Ivan's neck slip and he took advantage of it and wrenched his body away from her, grabbed onto her arm, and pulled her to the ground. He wrenched her arm behind her back and placed his boot right on her spine. She couldn't move as she lay on the ground.

It was then that she felt the familiar cold of a gun press into the side of her head.

"Say goodnight, little spider."


	29. RR29 Final Revenge

Ch 29 - Final Revenge

"_Say goodnight little spider."_

Natalia couldn't move. The boot pressed into her back was pushing down with an unnatural strength. She could feel a bruise starting to form and hear the cracking of her ribs. If the gunshot didn't kill her, the crushing force Ivan was applying to her back would. Her shoulder was slowly dislocating from its socket as Ivan pulled on that as well. She was stuck on the cold floor with a gun to her temple.

XXXXXX

"_I'm sorry…" _Those sweet words swirled around in his head as he struggled to wake up. As he slowly came to, the cold of the snow below and above him was comforting. It almost felt like a home he never knew. Loki struggled to get up as soon as the sharp nauseating smell of blood hit his nose.

"Natalia!" He knew she had hit him. The shock of the blood scared him again and he immediately reached out with his senses to find her. The forced rest rejuvenated him and he felt able to apparate again, so he did.

He appeared inside of the compound in a torch lit room. Ivan had Natalia on the ground with a gun pressed to her head and she looked infuriated. On the other end Ivan looked insane and almost maniacal.

"Ivan!" he yelled. It caused Ivan to lose his focus and that's when Loki struck him. He sent a blast of power straight into the man, carrying him off his feet and through the door to the room.

Loki rushed over to help Natalia up but she pushed him away.

"Get out of my way Loki!"

Confused, he grabbed onto her arm as she turned to see where Ivan had landed.

She wrenched her arm free and then shoved him out of the way. She hurried through the door and saw Ivan lying in a crumpled heap on the floor. From the sounds coming from him, he was alive but unconscious.

Loki watched her look at Ivan for a moment and then to his surprise she grabbed onto his leg and started to drag him through the hallway.

"Natalia…" She ignored him and kept on going down the hall.

"Natalia wait!" This time he caught up to her and grabbed onto her arm more forcefully.

She whipped around to look at him and the intense glare she gave him almost made him have to take a step back. He could feel the rage coming off her in waves.

He cleared his throat. "Natalia wait. Don't run blindly into this, what are you planning to do?"

"What I should have done a long time ago. He deserves to die. As long as he lives, you and Ksenia will be in danger. Don't you see Loki? I have to do this, now move!"

Loki didn't move an inch. As he stared at her, her walls started to fall and her face softened.

"Please, let me go Loki." Loki knew that she had to do whatever it was that she was planning but he didn't want her to have to do it alone. She had been alone for far too much of her life. He wanted her to share the burden. This wasn't going to be some regular kill for her, this was going to be _the_ kill. She was going to end the nightmare once and for all and move on with her life as best as she could.

He softened his grip and let go of Natalia's arm. "I'll wait for you in the courtyard. Come back to me Natalia and we will leave this place behind forever."

She offered him a small smile and then continued dragging an unconscious Ivan down the hallway.

She knew exactly how to end this. She dragged him into the lab that had become so familiar to her and threw him into the wall on the far side. Seeing the chain link cage she was once kept in, she dragged it to the middle of the room. She grabbed a coil of wire off the nearby desk and then yanked the man who had ruined her life towards the cage. Hoisting him up, she tied his left arm to the cage and then the left. For extra measure, she used the rest of the wire coil to tie his feet, head, and anywhere else she could think of so he could not escape.

By this time, he had started to come to. Any broken bones that he had were healing fast but that did not worry the red head. She was confident he wouldn't be able to break free once she was done with him.

Ivan quickly glanced around the room with his eyes and then laughed to himself.

"So what now little spider? You can't keep me here forever."

The smile Natalia offered him was unnerving. It was too similar to his own when he played the tormentor. She said nothing but got up and walked out of his view. He couldn't turn his head but he heard a scraping noise and then he knew what she was going to do.

Natalia was dragging the heavy machine that had stolen her innocence, but she was not going to wipe his memory. In fact, she wanted him to remember everything he had done to her and countless others while she killed him.

The machine was dragged across the lab and then placed within arm's length to his side, knowing that he would never be able to reach it. She then ripped a panel open and then started tying the wires to the coils binding him to the chain link cage. When she was finished, she took a step back and admired her work.

She couldn't quite tell, but she thought she could see a glint of fear in the man's eyes. He was a coward. Never taking her eyes off of his, she placed her hand on the lever that had caused her so much pain and then pulled it.

The room became bright with the glow of electricity surging through the wires and into the coils wrapped around Ivan's body. The chain link cage only amplified the current and she started to smell the scent of searing flesh. The screams of agony the man emitted made Natalia want to leave the room, but she needed to watch Ivan Petrovich die. She watched his body grow weaker and weaker. Any normal human would have died in the first few seconds but Ivan was hanging on for dear life. For two whole minutes she watched with no regrets until his eyes finally closed.

Grabbing onto the lever again, she turned the machine off. Smoke came from every orifice of his burned body and relief flooded through Natalia. It was finally over, the princess had slayed the dragon and it was finally time to leave the castle forever. She walked to the door and stood in its frame wondering what to do next in her life. She was never granted the opportunity to do whatever it was she wanted.

"It isn't over," she heard whispered from behind her. Ivan had somehow lived and was still trying to make her life hell.

"It will never be over," he said from his restraints. "Your daughter will be found and the next phase…"

His words were cut short. Natalia had whipped around faster than she ever had before and ran towards her monster. She jumped and planted her right boot into Ivan's chest, hearing his rib cage shatter and her left foot on his shoulder, shattering that as well. In the same moment, she grabbed onto the sides of his head and then pulled as hard as she could.

Tendons snapped, his neck broke, skin ripped and then his head separated from his shoulders. Natalia flipped backwards with the head of the dragon in her hands and then landed as gracefully as a cat. Not even looking at the body the head had left behind, she turned and walked to the courtyard to meet Loki, Ivan's severed head still in her hand.

XXXXXX

Loki saw her emerge from the building and sighed with relief, and then gasped when he saw what was in her hand. He watched as she grabbed a post from the ground and drove it into the frozen ground in front of the compound door. She stabbed the head onto the post and then turned away without a backward glance. It was her message to any of Ivan's followers. The same would happen to them if they followed her.

Loki embraced her when she reached him and he could just feel the relief coming from her body.

"We have to finish it. We need to destroy the rest of serums on the supply trucks."

Loki objected. "You need to rest Natalia; you have been through more than anyone should have gone through."

"I can't Loki, not yet. This has to end, please."

Sighing, he nodded in agreement and then they set out into the forest.

XXXXXX

After what felt like hours, they had located the supply trucks and destroyed all of the serums in them. For good measure, she rigged each truck with the explosives located in the crates and blew them all up so that there would be no trace for any others to find. Natalia packed a bag with a few and headed back to the compound in order to destroy the lab and all of the files it contained.

She left Loki at the last truck so that he could journey back to Asgard to get Ksenia and bring her back to Natalia.

Smiling to herself when she saw the last of the light from the portal disappear, she picked up her pace.

Reaching the compound once more, she skirted around the head she planted in front of the door and made her way through the hallways for the last time. She went to Ivan's office first and hurriedly went through some of the files on Red Room members. After this was all over, she planned on hunting them all down as well as anyone who had ties to the Red Room. When she was happy with all that she had found, she stuffed them into her bag and then wired some of the explosives together and then ran out before the blast went off. As soon as she rounded the corner, the deafening sound of the explosions went off and she felt the blast of heat rush past her.

Each office she passed, she threw a block of TNT into it and blew them to pieces. She saved the lab for last. Walking in, she saw Ivan's body, minus the head, still tied to the cage. She walked past it and to the filing cabinet. She ripped out each file, each paper she could find and dropped a block of TNT right on top. She then wired it to other objects around the room and saved the memory wiping machine for last. She dumped the rest of the explosives from her bag onto the chair and stuck the wire into one of them. She then lit the fuse and ran as fast as she could out of the compound.

As soon as she felt the cold air hit her face from the outside, the blast went off. Having nowhere to relieve the pressure from the explosives, it traveled through the halls and through the front door of the compound. The sound the building made sounded like a deep sigh, followed by the fire from the blast. The intense heat felt agonizing on Natalia's back but she didn't move out of the way.

It seared her flesh as she walked from the compound. With the adrenaline still in her, it started to heal. She felt like she deserved that last bit of pain that the Red Room gave her.

She shook the last remnants of the pain off and looked up to see Loki standing in the snow filled courtyard with a golden bundle in his arms.

Natalia felt her entire body glow and she took an eager step forward to see her daughter again.

Loki gathered the bundle closer and took a step back.

"Natalia wait…" he said hesitantly.

Natalia stopped dead in her tracks. "What is it Loki, let me see her."

"There is something you need to know first," he said as he cradled Ksenia in his arms.

"Loki, is she… is she okay?"

The look on his face told her everything she needed to know…

XXXXXXX

_**I am soooooo sorry it has taken me so long to update. Senior year of college has been rough and I have been pouring my focus into that. I promise I will not let that much time lapse again. I hope you all enjoyed this new chapter! The story isn't over yet, in fact, I'm not sure if I should start a new book in the story or just keep it going with this one. I'll have to figure it out but I'm sure you guys will like it **___


	30. RR30 Between Worlds

RR30 Between Worlds

The whole time Lady Sif cared for baby Ksenia, she couldn't stop worrying about her. Where had Loki gotten her from? She was a mortal child, but her eyes were not that of any mortal she had ever seen. As the early morning sunlight filtered in, the purple in her eyes just seemed to shine.

As Sif stared at the beautiful little girl, she started coughing again.

"Oh dear child, it's alright, you are safe and cared for." This baby was seriously sick and it pained her that she was such a fierce warrior but she couldn't even protect the baby from this sickness.

When the baby stopped coughing, she wrapped it tighter in the golden blanket and walked her around the room to keep her calm. She had no idea how to care for a baby but this just seemed natural to her. Loki could not have stolen her. He was connected to this child's mother somehow and the worry he had in his eyes when he handed her over was too real.

It wasn't too long after getting lost in her thoughts that she heard a pounding at her door. She laid Ksenia in the middle of her bed and gently covered her, thankful that she had finally fallen asleep.

She cracked her door and peered out to find six guards waiting for her. She slipped out of her room and closed the door behind her. She stood protectively in front of it and put on her bravest face.

Lady Sif, we have been ordered to search your chambers.

"Search my chambers for what?" she asked the lead guard Elsviarn.

"You have been accused of harboring a Midgardian child, what have you say about that," he asked with a sneer.

This was the guard she had sparred with not too long ago, and won. He was trying to get a rise out of her.

"What proof have you?" she asked a little more defensively. The healers must have reported her, they were the only ones who knew about the matter.

"We have proof enough, now stand aside." Elsviarn tried pushing her to the side but her hand caught the guards arm.

Their eyes locked and their bodies tensed. Elsviarn turned toward his fellow guards and gave a nod, allowing them to move in to remove Sif from barring the door. Instead of letting them, she took on the challenge. The child would surely be killed by Odin's orders if she was found.

She tightened her grip on the guards arm and twisted it as she swung around it. The immense strain on the arm made the guard groan. She then kicked him in the chest as she did at their recent spar and sent him to the ground and sliding across the hall. The other guards all tried laying their hands on her but with her small frame, she easily dodged them and sent them sprawling back with their fellow guard.

Lady Sif then slipped back into her room and locked it. She the hurriedly made a sling to hold Ksenia and went to grab her. The baby was still sleeping wrapped in the gold shawl so she gently picked her up and placed her in the sling so that she would be able to use her hands if she had to.

Leaving through the door was out of the question so that only left the window. The only way out was about sixteen stories down. She had to make it to Heimdall to get Ksenia out of Asgard. She only hoped that since Loki got here with the child, she would be allowed to leave with it.

Hugging Ksenia close, she stepped onto the ledge and then began her climb down. As a child, she always loved the twisting green vines that grew up the castle walls. Right now though, she was even more thankful since it gave her hand and footholds to allow her a safer way down.

Sif was now more afraid than she had ever been in her life, even in battles. Just the idea of something happening to an innocent child terrified her. Hearing the guards knock the door to her chambers down, she hurried her pace and climbed down faster.

The shouting from the guards above stopped when she made it about halfway down. They would make it to the ground level before she got there; she was trapped. She was about to panic until a hand grabbed her from an open window and began dragging her into the room. The sudden jerk caused her to instinctively let go of her handhold and hug the baby closer to her body as to protect her.

She landed in strong muscular arms and she was then immediately stood upright with a hand over her mouth. The man then closed the shutters to the window with his free arm, encasing them in darkness and then let her go. Sif stood frozen in her spot while using her arms to protect Ksenia from whatever was about to happen.

A candle was then lit and she saw who it was. She let out a sigh of relief when Thor hurried around his room and lit more candles. Castle rooms were extremely dark when closed off to the sunlight.

Thor then rushed back over to her and worriedly pushed her hair out of her face.

"Lady Sif, what is going on? There has been an order placed to bring you in. What have you done?"

Thor was genuinely worried. He was one of her most trusted friends and she knew he wouldn't do anything to hurt her.

Before Sif could answer, Ksenia chose that moment to begin her fitful crying again.

Surprising Thor, he took a small step back before coming forward and pulling the sling back. A tiny hand had escaped the gold shawl and Thor gasped. He pulled back the rest of it and revealed the baby girl.

"Sif where…"

"Thor I can explain, it's not what you think."

"What do you think it is that I think?" he asked in his usual goofy way. This is what made Sif fall for him years back.

"Never mind, the less you know the better."

Ksenia began coughing again and worry became etched across his face.

"It is sick."

"Yes Thor, she is. I have to get her back to Lok… the man who brought her to me."

"I will help you. What part of the castle?"

"That's the problem Thor, she isn't from here. She is of Midgard."

Ksenia then opened her eyes and the brilliant purple instantly made Thor fall for her.

"Are you sure Sif, her eyes…"

"I know, they are unusual. She needs to get back to her mother, I fear that she will not make it too much longer."

"Healers, what about the healers? They could help her."

"I have already tried that, they are the ones who turned me in, and besides, it is a mortal sickness"

Thor looked deep in thought.

"Stay here, I have an idea." He barely finished his sentence before he was already out of the room.

Sif had never been in Thors chambers before. She had always expected it to be messy but it was actually clean. His bed was even made. She walked over to it and sat down with Ksenia still in the sling, hoping that her body heat would keep the child's chills away.

As she waited for Thors return, she couldn't help but let her mind wander some more about the baby. What had happed that would have made Loki take the baby. It had to have been bad, it looked like she had just been born.

She wasn't sure how long she had been daydreaming but as soon as Thor came back, she was on her feet in an instant.

"Everything has been taken care of. I went to the healers and explained to them that it was all a test from me, as Odin's son to evaluate whether they would follow the laws no matter what emotions they would be feeling. I told them the baby had been enchanted to seem like a Midgardian. The guards have been informed that this has been a test though they are still skeptical. Did you engage them Lady Sif?"

"I did, they wanted into my chambers but Ksenia was in there and they were going to take her. I was not going to allow that to happen."

"Sif! Well, a ladies chambers are sacred so I guess they will understand. Well, Elsviarn may not, I know how much you both despise each other. He asked why you fled but I told him it was part of the test."

"Thank you Thor, really. You saved my life today. I would love to stay and chat but I need to get her home, she is very sick and I think her mother needs to see her as soon as she can."

"Yes, I'll escort you to Heimdall. Keep her hidden though."

With that they set off. They avoided as many people as they could and made it to the bridge with no problems. Once across, Heimdall stood guard, just as he had done for thousands of years. When he saw Sif, he knew Loki had gone to her. He allowed Sif to pass, but denied Thor entry to the portal.

Thor knew not to question Heimdall so he just watched from the entrance as Heimdall instructed Sif on what to do. What surprised Thor though was when Heimdall peered into Sif's sling to look at the baby. His lips moved as if he were saying a quick prayer and then abruptly stepped back as the portal started up.

Within seconds, Sif and the baby were gone and he was left alone with the golden clad god.

"I do not know what is going on, but thank you Heimdall for allowing her to go."

Heimdall looked him dead in the eye and said, "That child is special Thor. Everything must be done to keep her safe."

"Special in what way? She is a mortal child, and I fear that she is dying…"

Thor hadn't even finished his rebuttal when Heimdall walked to the back of the room to peer at the stars. He took this as a sign to leave.

XXXXXX

When Sif made it to earth, the portal had melted its way to the ground through a deep layer of snow. It was dark here, though from the storm or time of say she did not know. Sif had never been to Midgard before so this was all new. The snow sent a shiver through her body as she checked on Ksenia. She was awake but seemed as if she was in a daze. Ksenia didn't have too much longer.

As the wind whipped around her, she worriedly called out for Loki. Sif didn't know where she was supposed to go to find him. He could be in danger right now and she wouldn't even know it. Her warrior instincts began to kick in and she decided to set out on the clearest path. She only hoped that it was the right direction.

She hadn't made it too far when she heard her name called.

"Sif! Sif what are you doing here!"

It was Loki. He was about to summon a portal when he saw Sif's portal come down in the distance. He had decided to head off towards her, hoping that she had come down with good news, though he was doubtful. Sif was not a rule breaker and as far as he knew would never travel to Midgard without a good reason.

Loki reached the portal site within minutes and saw that she was not there. She had set off not too long before since he could sense her near. Following his instincts through the snow, he saw her right up ahead and called out to her.

The relief on her face was overwhelming. She ran up to him and pressed her body to his. This action surprised Loki since they were not _that _close as friends. In fact, he though she kind of hated him most of the time. Realization hit him though when he felt a small bump in between them. She was trying to keep Ksenia warm.

He wrapped Sif in his arms but Sif then pulled back.

"Loki, you're cold. You aren't putting out any warmth, are you okay?"

Confused, Loki brushed it off. "What are you doing here Sif? I thought I told you that I would return to fetch her.

"I know Loki, but I panicked, the guards found out she was there and came after her. I only escaped because of Thor. He smoothed out the situation but…" she trailed off.

"But what Sif?" he asked with the concern of a worried father.

"The baby, she's dying."

Sif watch as all of the color drained from Loki's face. A tear even escaped his eye. Reaching out, he pulled the sling back to see the ashen color of Ksenia's face.

Loki then took her from the sling and tucked her into his coat to protect her from the icy shards that were biting at them all.

"Go home Sif, I don't know how I could ever repay you for all of your help."

Sif nodded and then made her way back to where the portal had set her down. Loki had to do whatever it was on his own.

XXXXXX

Loki made it the short way back to Natalia just as the explosion went off behind her. For a moment, he worried that the flames had gotten her, but they hadn't.

Natalia looked up to see Loki standing before her with Ksenia wrapped up in his arms.

She felt her entire body glow and she took an eager step forward to see her daughter again. Loki gathered the bundle closer and took a step back.

"Natalia wait…" he said hesitantly.

Natalia stopped dead in her tracks. "What is it Loki, let me see her."

"There is something you need to know first," he said as he cradled Ksenia in his arms.

"Loki, is she… is she okay?"

The look on his face told her everything she needed to know…

She dropped to her knees as they no longer supported her. Loki came forward and kneeled with her, pushing the gold bundle into her arms. She looked at the sweet face that peered up at her. Even though Ksenia was at deaths doorstep, her brilliant eyes sparkled against ashen skin. She let out a faint cough and it broke Natalia's heart. The little girl she held in her arms was minutes away from leaving her world.

Natalia brought her face up against Ksenia's as Loki shielded them from the biting wind. Loki could faintly hear soothing sounds coming from Natalia as she sang her daughter a lullaby. No one moved for minutes until Loki felt Natalia's body tense up and heard her whisper one last time.

"Goodbye, my Malenkaya."

Natalia choked on her last words to her daughter. The emotions taking over her body were some of the strongest that she had ever felt in her entire life. They were crushing her body and she felt as if she were dying. The pain she felt was not like any she had experienced before. It was a million times worse than being burned by fire and she would gladly trade what she was feeling now for all the tortures she had endured simultaneously. She grasped at her chest as sobs finally broke free. Her daughter was gone, she had taken her last breath in the cruel world.

Loki reached out for the bundle in her arms but Natalia wouldn't let go.

"Natalia, you have to let go, she's gone."

Natalia looked up at him with hurt written all over her face. Hurt mixed with anger danced across her features as she kneeled in front of him.

"Kill me," she said

Loki looked at her in horror. "Natalia no. You are finally free to live your life, you don't have to run anymore."

"How can I live in this world knowing that people like them exist? I have nothing left to live for."

Loki looked hurt. "You have me, Natalia. Stay for me."

Tears flowed from her eyes again. "Death follows me Loki. Kill me, or I'll do it myself."

Looking dead in her eyes, he responded with a firm "no."

He expected her to give up, or at least shred some sort of emotion. What he didn't expect was for her to slip a knife out of her boot and slide it across her throat,

"Natalia nooooooo!" He lunged for the knife and got it away from her, but not before the damage was done. Dropping the knife, he held his hands around her throat to stop the bleeding and felt a chill go through his body as she smiled at him.

"Don't you dare leave me Natalia, I finally found something to keep me sane in this world and I will not lose you!" The bleeding slowed as he put pressure on the cut and the smile on her face soon turned into a frown.

It was Loki who realized it first, she was still healing faster than normal due to the adrenaline still in her system. The cut across her neck sealed itself and the scar faded. Loki caught her arm as it reached for the knife again and forced her to drop it.

"You are going to keep trying aren't you," Loki asked with a deep sadness.

He was met with a look of pure determination. She started crying again while still holding the bundle in her arms. Loki held her close as he thought about a plan.

"Natalia, I…I can take the pain away." This was the hardest decision he had ever made in his life.

"What do you mean, you said you wouldn't kill me."

"I can take you memories, everything that you have endured so that you can live."

"Do it," she said without hesitation.

"Natalia, you won't remember Ksenia or anything that has happened since you found out you were carrying her. You will not remember me, or any of our late night conversations, or our dreams we shared… It will take it all."

"I'm sorry Loki, please," she begged, and Natalia never begged.

Loki knew he had to do it, no matter how much it hurt him. It would be cruel to allow her to live with these memories. And if didn't take them, she would one day succeed in killing herself and it would be all his fault. He couldn't live without her, and because he loved her, he would do this.

Loki placed a hand on each side of her temple and then closed his eyes as he felt the energy surge from his body. He felt his consciousness leave his body and entwine with hers. Exploring her mind, he carefully drew away the parts of her mind that she wanted gone. She was carrying around much more hurt than he could have ever imagined. Her mind was a dark place, the lighter spots which was supposed to be peace was eerily diluted. As he delved further though, he found just a spot of brilliant white. Curiosity got the best of him and he prodded at it. He gasped when he saw himself in there. The happiest and most peaceful parts of her life were when he was around. He immersed himself in her emotions, a sob escaping his throat as he felt what she felt. Another emotion then pulled him out of the happiest and most beautiful place he had ever seen. He was encased in a deep blue and felt as if his heart was about to be pulled from his chest. It was what she was feeling right at this moment and it hurt like a pain he hadn't ever felt before. Not giving it another moments thought, he grabbed onto it and pulled. Gathering everything he needed, he struggle to get away from the hold of the pain and ripped his way out of her mind. There was no gentler way to take memories.

The force he had to use to rip from her mind knocked her back and into unconsciousness. She lay in the snow, still holding onto Ksenia. Not able to bear it any longer, he got up and took the baby from her mother.

He left Natalia then, it was the last time he would ever see her for years. The tears on his face froze before they could hit the ground. Either that or they were already solid before they left the tear ducts. He felt his soul darken as he made his way into the forest and away from the compound to bury the baby.

After placing her in a box he scavenged from a truck, he placed her inside with the gold blanket and closed the lid. He lowered her into the ground and piled rocks on top. When the deed was done, he vowed to never again let any mortal take anything away from him ever again. To do this, he knew he needed to succeed his father and take the throne after him. He needed power, and nothing would stop him from getting it. He would one day rule Midgard and everyone would fear him.

Loki couldn't stand to be there one more second. Natalia was gone, Ksenia was gone, and a part of his soul was gone. He summoned the portal and ascended back to Asgard.

XXXXXX

Insanely curious, a man watching the entire past hour between Natalia and Loki emerged from the bushes to see what it was this… this god, had buried. He was sent by HYDRA when communications started to fail from the Red Room complex to find out all he could, and report it back to headquarters.

The man kept thinking that it was a child that was buried by the way the two had been holding it. He knew that woman he saw was the Black Widow, she was a legend. Could this be her child? Was it even possible?

He placed the stones aside and after a while, he found the box. Gently lifting the lid, he saw a small bundle wrapped in the most beautiful golden blanket he had ever seen. Pulling it back, he discovered that it indeed was a child, and it was no longer living.

He lifted the child from the box and held his ear to its chest. She couldn't have been gone for more than half an hour. Placing his hand on her tiny chest, he sent a surge of power into her. He smiled when he felt her heart start again. Another few minutes and the baby's eyes opened. The man gasped when he saw the prettiest shade of purple look up at him.

There was something special about this child and he couldn't bring himself to turn it in to headquarters. No one even knew that the Black Widow had a child, so who would ever find out? He and his wife recently lost a baby, he was sure she wouldn't say no to taking this one in and raising it as their own.

The baby girl started to cry due to the cold and the man wrapped her back up. He placed the lid back on the box and placed it back in the hole, covering it with stones again. Retreating into the woods again to return home, he was giddy with happiness at the thought of being a father again.

XXXXXX

To be continued…


	31. RR31 Stowaway

Ch 31 – Stowaway

_Present time_

Not too long after the Winter Soldier showed up to help them find Natalia, the team consisting of Steve, Clint, Tony, Thor, and Bucky set out into the freezing snow together to try and find her.

The team had no idea where they were going. All tracks were for sure covered up by now and it was starting to get dark. They were relying on the Winter Soldier and his tracking skills to get them to their destination, wherever that may be. Trying to find Natalia out here was like looking for a needle in a haystack.

They were surrounded by nothing but white. All conversation had ceased, even Steve's constant pleas to get Bucky to talk to him. It was clear he only wanted to find the Black Widow, but the team did not know that he had other plans in mind for her. He was sure that she would kill them the first chance she got. He was just like her, at least back when they trained together. James had never fought another person that could match her stamina and agility. He only hoped the team would come to their senses and help him, he couldn't do this alone.

You see, James did not know Natasha, he only knew Natalia. He just can't seem to understand why Steve and Tony are so hell bent on _rescuing _her. Anything he may have heard about Natasha Romanoff was not present in his mind; it had been taken from him. The only reason he was there was to protect Steve from getting killed. He owed him this favor and then he would disappear again, his debt repaid. Red Room and HYDRA had stolen his life from him, and he believed that Natalia willingly stayed with them to continue its mission. He had been dragged away and kept on a short leash. There was no forgiving her.

It seemed like hours had passed the team by, but they finally found where they thought Natalia was. Up ahead, they saw a green glow coming from a snowbank beneath a massive waterfall.

"They have got to be in there," Steve said worriedly as he looked to Tony. The hopeful look on his face as well as the groups made him push on.

The only problem was that they couldn't find a way in; the entrance was completely iced over. It only took a few pounds from Thor's hammer though, and they were in. The green glow illuminated the dimly lit space and what they saw before them was terrifying. Loki and Natalia were kneeling in the center of the cave. Loki had his hands over each side of her temples, and whatever energy Loki was using was causing the bright green glow that they had seen. Each of their heads was thrown back with an expression of pain written on them. It was taking everything Loki had to keep his hands still, but Natalia's arms were stretched out from her sides as the strange energy coursed through her body. The blue jewel from her wristband was flickering angrily and causing burns to appear on her wrist.

"Loki!" Thor yelled worriedly to his brother.

Loki's eyes opened and instead of meeting his green gaze, it was replaced with blue.

"The crystal has a hold of him! He cannot let go!" Thor was about to pull his brother away but was stopped by Steve grabbing onto his arm.

Steve didn't know what would happen if Thor touched them, so he stopped him. The team didn't have a chance to figure out a plan before blue lightning exploded from Natalia's wrist with a deafening crack.

The stone had had enough, and finally died. The memories Loki was giving back to her were fighting against the stones energy. It was changing and reshaping her mind, and the stone couldn't fight back. It layed shattered in its metal casing still on Natalia's arm. Natalia was knocked unconscious but Loki remained alert, but obviously tired from the battle he had endured in her mind. Tony, Steve, and Clint, rushed over to the red head and Tony picked her up into his lap, inspecting her for injuries. Thor helped Loki to his feet and gave him a strong pat on the back and offered him one of his big goofy smiles. Loki just looked at him with sadness in his now green eyes and then left the cave without another word. Tony looked up in time to see Loki leave and Thor rush after him. He was then left in the cave with Steve, Clint, and a very angry looking Bucky.

Tony focused back on the woman in his arms. "Her wrist is broken and she has some severe burns, but other than that I think she is okay…physically at least. We still don't know what kind of damage that damn stone may have done to her. Be careful and don't touch the pieces, I don't want to be the cause of another accident."

Clint rolled his eyes at his teammate and kneeled down beside him. "Tony, stop beating yourself up about this. Just focus on helping us gets her home."

Steve was unsure of what to do, but he knelt down as well. The red head had almost killed him not to long ago after all. "Natasha, are you in there? Look, we aren't mad at you, it was Natalia who did all of this, not you. Stay strong and come back to us."

Clint was now at a loss for words, but he helped Tony pick her up. As they turned to leave, Bucky was blocking their exit.

"Bucky, we couldn't have found her without you. Thank you for your help, but I think we have it from here." Those words were hard for him to say, he was basically saying goodbye to his childhood friend, forever. He had been searching for him for months and then he just shows up. There was no way he could convince him to come back with them.

"I'll help you get her to the jet," he offered. Steve was happy at his offer, maybe he would stay with them after all?

"Thanks Bucky," he said as he offered him a smile.

"I'll carry her though," Bucky continued. "The snow is getting deep so it's going be a hard walk."

The now empty expression on Bucky's face unnerved Tony as he held the red head protectively in his arms.

Elated at Bucky's offer to help, Steve nodded approvingly at Tony to hand her over. Reluctantly, Tony did, trusting Steve's judgement.

As soon as Bucky had Natalia in his arms, he lowered her to the ground and then attacked the team. No one saw it coming. He started by punching Tony in the stomach, causing him to fly backwards from the force of the metal arm, and slammed into the wall behind him. The force of the impact knocked him out cold. Steve stayed frozen from shock so Clint drew an arrow and let it fly. Bucky's metal arm deflected the shot and in the same move, grabbed Clint by the throat and raised him into the air only to slam him back into the earth, knocking him out as well. Steve finally came to his senses but the few hits he did manage at his old friend were easily dodged. He felt the metal fist hit him in the back of the neck and before he knew it, he hit the ground with his two fallen teammates, stunned.

"I could have easily killed you all, but I owe you. I will dispose of the infamous Black Widow before she kills you and my debt to you will be repaid. Goodbye Steve."

Those were the last words Steve heard before the darkness took over.

Bucky picked up Natalia again and intended to make it back to the jet the Avengers had flown in on and fly it away from this place. It brought back too many bad feelings being so close to the Red Room. He wanted to make Natalia suffer for all that she had done, and he knew just how to do it. He only hoped there was some strong rope or wire stored on the jet so that he could restrain her in case she woke up on the long journey back.

He made it to the jet with Natalia without running into Thor, but it made him uneasy that he didn't know where the god was. He layed the woman on the floor and hurried over to the controls to start the giant machine up. He got the jet off the ground with no problems and set the autopilot to his specified coordinates.

Searching a few overhead compartments, he found some rope to tie Natalia up with. He looped it over a bar from the roof and then attached it to her tied hands, stringing her unconscious form up against the wall. With her arms now raised above her head, he could see how badly the stone thing had burned her. With the ropes supporting her entire weight, her wrists started to bleed from the thin rope digging into them. Her feet reached the floor, but only barely; she was going to have a long ride ahead of her.

XXXXXX

After a few minutes in the air with Bucky piloting the jet, a bit of turbulence jostled awake a hidden stow away passenger.

Fuck, why did she keep passing out? Oh yea, now she remembered. Opening her eyes, the passenger saw nothing but dimly lit darkness. Slowly raising herself up, she lifted the grate above her and peered out into the dimly lit space of the jet.

"Holy shitballs," she whispered to herself. Seated in the pilot's seat was none other than the Winter Soldier, and to her left, the Black Widow tied from the ceiling and unconscious.

"You really did it this time Darcy, sticking your nose where it doesn't belong, idiot."

She let the grate back down to figure out a plan. Darcy had snuck onto the plane shortly before the Avengers boarded it. In her room at the tower, she played it old-school and stuffed pillows under her covers to make Jane think she was sleeping. She boarded the jet without anyone seeing her, except for Loki, and remained hidden in the under compartment of the jet. Loki saw her almost as soon as he apparated aboard, but chose not to give her location away. A few times along the flight, she kept passing out. Apparently it wasn't safe to fly when you had a concussion or two, but she didn't care. All she wanted to do was help save her friend, and she couldn't do that from the tower.

She knew she couldn't make the walk out in the snow, so she remained hidden in case they needed backup or something. Darcy ended up passing out again and only woke up just now due to the turbulence.

"Okay, plan. Make a plan Darcy… nope, I got nothing. I'm by myself on this one, where the hell is everyone!"

Footsteps sounded above her so she froze. She had heard stories about Steve's ex best friend, and she knew she would be no match against him. His boots hovered above her head and as long as she didn't make a sound and he didn't look down, she was safe…she hoped.

Darcy watched him go over to Natalia and brush a strand of hair behind her ear. "Okay, maybe he isn't so bad after all."

She then watched as he delivered a sturdy punch to her stomach. "Okay, he's bad, very bad." Natalia was defenseless as she remained unconscious and tied up. Bucky sent a few more punches to her face, stomach, and ribcage before he let out a frustrated scream and sat down next to her.

"Why did you stay with them!" he screamed. He drew out a knife and studied it as he continued his rant. "They came for me in the middle of the night and drugged me. They threw me onto a plane and the next thing I knew I was waking up years in the future." He then accidently nicked his finger with the knife and drew blood. Licking the drop of blood off, he continued his rant. "Oh, but then I learned I wasn't asleep though all of that time. They had control of my mind and made me do so many terrible things."

Darcy watched as he stood up and grabbed a hold of her bloodied face with his metal arm. "You were his favorite; I guess they didn't need me anymore." As he spoke, he drew the knife down her arm. He released her face and then made a similar cut on her other arm.

The pain from the torture must have started to wake Natalia up, as she began to try and move away from whatever was causing her pain. Her eyes remained closed, but she let out a faint cry of pain when Bucky suddenly stabbed the blade into her thigh and left it there.

"Wake up little spider," Bucky called to her. Only then did Natalia wake up enough to try and focus on what was going on.

"That's what he always said to you, Ivan, such a sweet man," he said with disgust as he twisted the knife that was embedded in her thigh. Natalia let out a small scream before she forced her lips shut.

"Oh come on Natalia, were old friends, you can still talk to me," Bucky teased. No matter what he said though, she kept her mouth shut as tears trickled down her face. The Black Widow didn't cry from pain, this was something else, but Bucky was thinking that he had finally broken her and he was taking pleasure in it.

There was absolutely nothing Darcy could do from her hiding spot under the floor. She silently cried along with Natalia as the torture went on. She still didn't know whether that was Natalia, or Natasha but whomever she was, they had a connection. Bucky knew just where to make it hurt where it wouldn't kill her yet. Natalia wouldn't talk, she would only cry out or whimper when the pain became too much.

"What makes you so special? You are just like me, yet Steve trusts you with his life! You are a murderer, brutal in your killings, and he still cares for you. Why?"

It started to make Bucky especially angry at her silence. "Answer me Natalia!" he screamed at her. She just turned her head away, ignoring his question.

Not being able to control his anger any longer, he stabbed the dagger into Natalia's stomach and twisted it as much as he could. Natalia let out a deafening scream and before she went silent and passed out once more, she smiled and said, "My name…" But before she could finish, she broke out into a coughing fit, and then started over, determined to finish. "My name is Natasha, and you just gave me what I wanted; death. Now I can join my daughter."

Blood ran down from the side of her mouth as her head drooped into unconsciousness.

Darcy couldn't believe what she had just heard; daughter? And she wanted to die to join her? It lit a fire within her. Darcy had wanted to die once, and someone had rescued her. Since then, she had so much to live for and was extremely grateful for her second chance. To just hear that it was Natasha again, and that she had wanted to die, she couldn't let that happen. It was her turn to save a life, even if it cost her, her life in return.

She busted the grate open and exploded from the floor with such fierceness, that Bucky froze as he had no idea what was going on. The girl tackled him and sent him to the ground in surprise. She let a few punches fly as she straddled the man and managed to hit the Winter Soldier a few time before he grabbed her hand.

Darcy's gaze never wavered as anger built up in her chest. Bucky narrowed his eyes at the realization that this was a just a puny normal girl and then threw her off of him and into the wall next to Natasha.

The impact hurt, a lot. Darcy cradled her ribs as she expected a few to be cracked and her vision became hazy again. _Don't you dare pass out again Darcy, don't you dare! _She yelled internally.

She shakily stood up and took up a position in front of Natasha, as if to protect her from any more harm. Bucky slowly walked towards her and she took a step back. She could feel the knife still sticking in Natasha's stomach and she was terrified it would hurt the red head more.

Bucky stopped his advance when he was right in front of the brave girl. There was a fire in her eyes and it amused him. Before he could finish her off, an alarm sounded from the control panel of the plane. The autopilot was being overridden and was changing the jets direction.

As soon as Darcy heard the alarm and watched Bucky's gaze shift away from her, she wrapped a hand around the knife in Natalia's stomach and pulled it out, only to ram it into the side Bucky's neck.

This totally caught the soldier off guard, but he still managed to hit Darcy hard enough that she flew across the jet and hit the pilot's seat. The impact had cut her forehead and knocked the breath out of her. Before Bucky could recover, she knew she had to do something. Through the pain, she crawled into the seat and saw one of her favorite things, a big red button. She buckled herself in and then hit the button. She turned and watched as the back of the jet opened, and sucked Bucky out into the night sky. She turned and hit it again, closing the door and restoring air pressure.

He was gone, she had done it! She sighed in relief and then realized the gravity of the situation; Natasha could be dying. Darcy ripped the seatbelt off and ran to Natasha. She had to get her down, but there was no knife she could use. She then grabbed a handhold on the wall and hoisted herself up, untying Natasha's bleeding wrists. Before the rope let go, she grabbed onto Natasha and helped her frail body to the floor.

"Natasha, don't you dare die on me, you hear me!" she yelled at the woman. Putting her head on Natasha's chest, she breathed a sigh of relief when she heard her heart still beating. Looking over her though, she became scared again. She had multiple cuts along her body, as well as several stab wounds and bruising all over. She ripped Natasha's tattered t-shirt open to reveal the stab wound and quickly found deepening bruises all over her chest, stomach, and ribs. The shaky breathing Darcy was hearing was probably due to multiple broken ribs.

Darcy hurriedly put her hands over the stab wound on Natasha's stomach. It was still bleeding at a steady rate and the red head couldn't afford to lose any more blood than she already had in the last hour. Darcy then noticed her thigh wound was still bleeding also so she ripped off her own over shirt and quickly tore it into. She tied it around Natasha's leg and then used the other half to press into her stomach. She was bleeding all over; Bucky was scary skillful with his knife.

Darcy was starting to get even more lightheaded. She was covered in her own blood as well as a mass amount of Natasha's. She tried to chalk it up just to that but she knew she was about to pass out due to her own injuries she had sustained by Natalia's hand, as well as Bucky's.

She couldn't pass out, Natasha needed her, and so she tried to blink the sleepiness away that was overtaking her. Just in case, she placed Natasha's arms on top of her shivering body and then Darcy layed her own body over them. She hoped that would warm the red head up and stop some of the cuts from bleeding as well as keep pressure on the stab wound in case she passed out. Darcy was glad she did, because as soon as she layed over Natasha's body, she slipped into unconsciousness.

XXXXXX

Tony was the first to wake up by Thor's booming voice. "My friends! What has happened?"

"Keep it down Thor, I'm trying to…" Tony then realized that he wasn't just sleeping; he had been knocked out by the Winter Soldier. He jumped as soon as he came to this realization and then helped Thor try and wake Clint and Steve.

Once the team had quickly assessed their injuries, they realized that Bucky had taken Natalia.

"We need to find them! They can't be too far ahead of us!" Steve exclaimed, still in denial about what had just happened.

"I am afraid they are my friends, I have been trying to find Loki for the past twenty minutes, and it took me half an hour getting back. They have to be far away from here by now."

"Damn," Clint said. "What about Loki? Can he find her?"

Thor looked sad. "He has gone away somewhere and I fear he will not return."

"Stop standing around!" Tony yelled from the mouth of the cave. "We need to get back to the ship!"

The immense fear in his voice sparked an adrenaline rush in them and they all ran from the cave and trudged through the snow in the direction of their jet.

"This would be so much easier if I had my suit," Tony exclaimed when they reached the location where they landed the jet. They quickly found it to be gone, knowing Bucky had taken it.

"What the hell do we do now!" he yelled.

"I got it!" Clint said as he pulled out his cell phone and dialed.

"Fury! Don't hang up, I'm sorry I'm contacting you directly but we need help."

Steve could hear the yelling coming from the other line as Clint hurriedly explained what was going on as Tony tried to pull the phone away from Clint's ear. Thor grabbed ahold of Tony and held him still as he slung curses at Clint. As soon as Clint hung up he gave them all a nod. "Fury is sending help."

Thor then released Tony and Tony took a swing at Clint's face. Clint easily dodged it and sent Tony sprawling to the ground. He got back up and then got in Clint's face.

"What the hell did you do that for Clint?! Now Fury knows that Nat has been compromised!"

"I had to Tony! We had no other choice and seeing as we don't have a jet to go after them, we were screwed!"

Tony was still seething. "Then what about the jets Nat and Bucky took to get here!? We could have taken one of those!"

"And how would we have located them Tony, how! Is it a SHIELD jet? Is it one of your jets? I don't think so. All they do is fly, they don't have the tracking capability like ours."

Tony was starting to see his point and started to calm down, but he was still upset. "How long until extraction buzzardbrain?"

Clint rolled his eyes, "about an hour."

The team had to wait exactly that. As soon as a massive jet landed not too far from them and opened its doors, the team hurried aboard.

They were met with a black haired female agent who urged them to follow. She introduced herself as they made their way to the control room.

"I'm agent Melinda May. Fury contacted us and ordered us to locate you. The control room is right this way and you have access our resources to aid in your mission."

Clint became excited, he knew who she was but he remained composed. "Did Fury explain to you what was going on?"

"No, he said it was classified unless you wished to explain yourselves. Here we are."

She opened a door and they entered a room full of state of the art computer technology, and people.

"Out," agent May ordered the overly curious and excited people when the team entered.

"Wait," Tony said. "They might be able to help."


	32. RR32 Recap

Chapter 32- Recap

The SHIELD team looked at the group of Avengers in amazement, having never met them before. Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, Clint Barton, and Thor were legends and the SHIELD team considered it an honor that Fury had called them to offer their help. The look on their faces showed that they would be happy to help them with whatever they needed. After agent May told her team to leave the control room, Tony stopped them, thinking that all of their expertise together would help them in getting their missing friend back.

Agent May took charge of the team and addressed Tony first. "Mr. Stark, Director Fury advised me to tell you that your mission is classified and you are under no orders to express any details regarding it."

"Please, call me Tony." Tony then looked at his team and they gave him a nod in silent agreement that they would share the details of what was going on.

Tony turned back to the other agents and sighed. "Before we tell you anything, we need to get my jet turned around. It's been stolen and we have reason to believe that our team member will be harmed."

Skye excitedly took control of the situation and got to work hacking into the system. Tony watched the young girl clicking away at the computer faster than he had ever seen someone do.

"Okay, Mr. Stark…" Skye began.

He corrected her with "Tony."

"Okay, Tony, help me out here will you." Tony went to her side and they got to work rerouting the jet. After a few tense moments, she exclaimed, "got it! It's been rerouted to dock to the BUS. It looks to be about an hour until it gets here. Who is on it if you don't mind me asking?"

Tony and the rest of his team looked sheepish. Only, agent May, agent Morse, Skye, and Jemma was gathered around the control panel looking at them expectantly.

"Go on Tony," Steve encouraged.

"Okay, Natalia, I mean Natasha Romanoff has been kidnapped by The Winter Soldier. She was unconscious and he took her from us and stole the jet. We need your help for when they dock."

"Oh shit," Skye mumbled.

Agent May shot her a warning look and then explained that they had aided Natasha earlier. "A few days ago, we got a call that HYDRA was attacking a city block, agent Morse and myself responded and found Agent Romanoff with a girl named Darcy fighting them off. She mentioned that she was looking for someone but that the rest of you were not assigned to the mission. Is this incident related?"

"Okay fine!" Skye blurted out feeling guilty. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you May, but Romanoff came to me in secret asking me to help her find the Winter Soldier, and I found him. I hope that helps…"

The rest of Skye's team looked at her in disappointment.

"I said I was sorry! Romanoff told me that not even Darcy knew about the mission and telling anyone else could endanger them and put a target on our backs. And I was not about to defy the infamous Black Widow."

"That wasn't Romanoff you met," Clint said after taking in the information.

"Yes it was," Agent Morse responded. "She took a bullet for me."

Steve raised an eyebrow at her in amusement. "It's complicated but long story short…" Steve got cut off when Thor elbowed him. Steve looked up at the god and then realized what he was trying to say. He continued with, "Tony, maybe you should explain."

Tony was trying to focus on the controls, his emotions all over the place knowing that this whole situation was his fault. After a few moments of silence, Clint put his hand on Tony's shoulder to encourage him to go on.

"Well, here we go. As you all know, I can be a major jackass. I've been annoying Natasha nonstop with stupid questions about why she was the way she is."

"What do you mean," Jemma asked him.

"Doubt; I always sort of doubted her intentions. Everyone on my team knows a great deal about each other except for her. She was always so secretive and would never let us really know her. I kept bugging her and trying to get her to open up, and she finally agreed after I started building a time machine."

"That's impossible," Skye interrupted. Agent May shot her another look and she shut up.

"It wasn't really a time machine exactly. It allowed me and her to live her memories from the time she joined the Red Room. It put me in her mind and we were able to walk around and just watch."

"But how?" Skye piped up again. Knowing the young hacker wouldn't give up, agent May just let her talk.

"After the Chitauri invasion I picked up one of their crystals and used that to help with the transfer. Something went wrong and she became trapped in her own mind but I was able to escape. She became trapped in her childhood body and was forced to relive her worst moments of her life as she grew and all we could do was watch her from a monitor. Also, she wasn't just trapped, whatever happened in the memories, like a cut or gunshot wound, a burn, torture, electroshocks, broken bones…"

"Tony," Steve warned him as he started to get lost in the images again.

"Sorry, well whatever happened to her, it happened in real life as she layed there on that god dammed exam table. Banner spent day and night attempting to stitch her back together after every cut."

"Speaking of the Hulk, where is he?" Agent Morse asked after noticing the missing Avenger.

"She put in in the hospital, he's in a coma." Clint answered.

The SHIELD team all gasped; they didn't think that was even possible.

"As I was saying, after we figured out why she wouldn't wake up, which was because of the Chitauri crystal, Thor and I broke into Asg…"

He was cut off by a loud cough from Thor, warning him to leave that part out.

"Thor and I broke into some SHEILD files to try and find an answer and we did. We used what we found and Natasha finally woke up, but it wasn't really her. It was weeks later that we realized that it was Natalia that had woken up."

"Wait, I'm confused," Agent Morse said.

"Natasha was born as Natalia Romanova, she was taken by a man named Ivan Petrovich after he killed her parents who then used brainwashing and torture to turn her into the Black Widow. She is a trained assassin who has none of Natasha's memories whatsoever. Natalia was injected with the original Super Soldier serum and is super strong, fast, and has accelerated healing. She is evil and thinks that her sole mission is to take us, the Avengers out and then report back to Ivan. She used to train with Bucky, the Winter Soldier when they were in the Red Room together and when you came across her the other day, she was looking for him to try and get him to help her take us all out."

"Whoa now hold on, how could she have trained with the Winter Soldier? Isn't he like, super old and stuff? No offence Rogers," Skye said interrupting again.

Clint laughed to himself. "She's stronger than him as well."

The team listened on in amazement.

"Thankfully though, Bucky wanted nothing to do with her, he is still a little messed up in the head and only remembers her as Natalia. He wanted to protect his good buddy Steve here so he helped us find her back there where you picked us up. But then the knocked us all out and then took her to finish her off, stole the jet, and now here we are."

The SHIELD team was at a loss for words and it took a few minutes to fully absorb the entirety of the situation. It was agent May who spoke first though.

"So when this jet docks, the Winter Soldier and Natalia will be aboard." She said this to make her team realize exactly what was going to happen and to get their attention. "Both are considered hostile but we will not attack, only defend when needed." She was trying to come up with a plan to keep her team safe.

Knowing that they were on SHEILD territory, Tony and the team let her make the calls, thankful that they were helping.

"Morse, you will be with me to board the jet. I want Skye and Jemma to stay here out of the way."

She then looked at Tony for an okay.

Tony gave her a nod and then turned to his own team. "Thor, Clint, could you stay behind to help protect them incase this all goes south? Steve, you come with me."

Clint looked pissed but he agreed and Thor just nodded. Steve was glad to try and talk to Bucky again.

"Okay good," May said. "They should be getting close. Skye?"

"Ummm, whoa, they are actually only five miles out. They should be here in three minutes tops." Skye looked a little afraid but also excited.

"Battle stations," May called out and the team left, leaving a sullen looking Clint, Thor, Skye, and Jemma behind.

When agents May and Morse stopped at the ladder that led to the docked jet that attached to theirs, Steve and Tony braced themselves for another fight. When the locks unlatched, signaling a flawless landing, the team opened the hatch door and burst into the enemy jet.

Nothing jumped out at them and nothing moved. They were expecting to be attacked by a very angry Bucky but he wasn't even in sight. A lump across the jet on the floor caught their attention though and the team of four cautiously approached it.

"It's Darcy!" Steve called out as he reached it first. "And Nat!"

Steve and Thor tended to them as agent May stood guard and agent Morse inspected the plane.

Steve pulled and unconscious Darcy off of Natalia and inspected her injuries, all the while his eyes flitting over to Natalia. Tony kneeled down to Natalia and tended to her.

Tony gasped after he put two and two together after seeing the bloody rope cuts on Natalia's wrists.

"Bucky must have tortured her, she has multiple cuts and some stab wounds. Damnit she looks bad, she needs a doctor now."

"I think Darcy was laying on her to stop the bleeding," Steve added. "She has some cuts as well but I think most of the blood on her is from Natalia, she tried to save her. How did Darcy get here? And where's Bucky?"

Agent Morse completed her sweep of the bus and reported back to them. "No sign of anyone else aboard, extra heat signatures negative."

Tony and Steve were shocked since they expected Bucky to be aboard, but then grabbed the hurt girls off of the floor and were at a loss at what to do.

May noticed their worry and took the lead. "Let's get them to the lab." She pressed her finger to her earpiece and instructed Skye and Jemma to get to the lab and set up for surgery.

The time it took for them to get to the lab seemed like forever to Tony. He was so sick and tired at seeing his red headed friend so hurt and broken.

When they got to their destination, Jemma took the lead and had everyone doing something. Tony, May, Morse and Jemma set to work stopping the bleeding on Natalia while Steve, Clint, and Thor helped Darcy. Skye was still pulling things out of cabinets at Jemma's orders. Seeing that agent May had Natalia under control for the moment, she went to Darcy and gave her a once over. She decided that Natalia was worse, way worse.

"Darcy will be okay for now; I need to focus on Natalia. Skye, I need you to stich any deep cuts on Darcy, I've taught you how. Morse can help you if you get stuck after she gives her an MRI. May, I need you with me. The rest of you need to leave so I can have room to work."

The boys didn't move, they didn't want to leave their friends side. Seeing this, agent Morse left Skye's side and forcefully pushed them out of the lab before returning to her duties.

While the girls were in the lab, the boys became very frustrated but stayed out as they were told. They sat on the stairs outside of the lab facing the training area.

Inside, Jemma finally got all of the bleeding under control. The stab wound to Natalia's stomach was by far the worst injury and it took some time to get the bleeding to stop. The stab wound to her thigh was the next part she started on but she got it cleaned out and closed it. Along the girls arms were some more deep lacerations and it would take many stitches to get them to close. She wasn't sure why Natalia wasn't healing like she had when they met earlier.

After Jemma was sure that Natalia was stable, she examined her work, checking for anything that she may have missed. She had her lying on a large heating pad to get her temperature up and had her on oxygen. Under the bandages on the redheads arms were stiches going from the middle of her upper arms all the way to her wrists. She had agent May do the bandaging that enveloped her cut wrists and extreme burn from the wristband she had on. The wound on Natalia's stomach was also covered as well as the one on her thigh. Her broken ribs were bandaged and the various other small cuts to her face and body were either sutured or butterfly bandaged with help from agent May.

The woman's heartbeat was now steady though her blood pressure was low. She was very pale but she hoped that the blood transfusion would restore her blood count quickly enough. After her examination, she was satisfied with her work. She looked up at agent May and gave her a weak smile. Agent May in turn nodded to Natalia and Jemma realized what was missing. She went to a drawer across from the sink and pulled out a set of restraints. Walking back over to the hurt Avenger, she carefully attached them to her wrists and feet, and secured them to the rails of the hospital bed.

Agent May put a comforting hand on the young girl and offered her some words of encouragement. "You did well, Jemma." Jemma gave her a tired nod before heading over to check on Darcy.

"Natalia is stable, how is Darcy fairing?"

It was agent Morse who answered. "She has a concussion and a few cuts and scrapes. One of her ribs was broken and a few bruised. Skye got her stitched up, but I'm more concerned about why some of her injuries are a little older. I can't figure out where they could have come from. Surely the Avengers wouldn't have asked her to fight or anything." Agent Morse then gave Skye a quick pat on the back and went to check out Natalia and speak with agent May.

Jemma then looked over Darcy and was pleased to see that all of her vitals were close to normal. She made it a point to ask the Avengers about her older injuries. "Good job Skye!" she congratulated the young girl, but Skye didn't respond. She was just staring off into space and it concerned Jemma.

"Skye, what's wrong?" she asked her and turned her face towards hers.

"This is all my fault Jemma," she said. Knowing where this was going, she waved over agent May.

"Is Darcy okay?" the older black haired agent asked.

"Oh she's fine," Jemma assured her, "It's Skye that doesn't seem to be."

Agent May raised an eyebrow at her and crossed her arms, waiting for an explanation.

"It's all my fault May," she began. "If I hadn't agreed to help Natalia then none of this would have happened." The young hacker lowered her gaze in her own disappointment.

Understanding, agent May uncrossed her arms and lifted Skye's chin so that her gaze met her own. "Skye, none of this is your fault. You couldn't have known that it wasn't agent Romanoff. And if you hadn't agreed to help her, I'm sure she would have found another way to contact the Winter Soldier."

Skye still doubted herself though she felt a little better.

"And besides, agent Romanoff is a senior agent and is technically above you. If she asked you to help her on a mission, then I don't see why anyone wouldn't have helped."

Skye smiled at her supervising officer. "Thanks May."

Jemma smiled at the two before announcing that they needed to keep any eye on Natalia. She then cleaned the blood off of herself and went to talk to the Avengers waiting outside of the room.

The boys all jumped up at once when they saw the young doctor and crowded around her. Before they could get a word out, she assured them that both of their friends were okay and that they could go in and see them now.

Tony was the first one through the door and rushed over to Natalia's side. He got upset at the sight of the restraints but knew that they were necessary. Looking at his broken friend though, he felt worse than he had ever felt before and almost dropped to his knees.

Seeing that the Avengers needed some time alone, agent Morse, agent May, and Skye left the lab to wait outside.

Clint, Steve, and Thor all joined Tony at Natalia's side, giving her words of encouragement. After they knew that she would be okay, Steve, Clint, and Thor went over to see Darcy while Tony stayed behind with Natalia.

"Natasha, I know you are in there somewhere. I need you to come back okay? I'm sorry, so sorry for what I had you go through. Its unforgivable and I understand if you don't want to wake up but please," he begged as a few tears escaped. He grabbed onto her hand as he spoke, hoping that she could hear him. "After seeing what all you had to go through, I don't blame you for not talking to me. The things I saw will haunt me until the end of my days and it just kills me that it was you that had to endure those things. I don't understand how after they made you like that, through all of the tortures and trainings, that you were strong enough to overcome it all and become a part of this team. You are strong Natasha, so please, fight, and come back. I, I can't live without you. You have become one of the best friends I have ever known, and I don't make friends easily. Leave Natalia behind, you are Natasha Romanoff, an Avenger, and a part of this team." He lowered his head so that it rested on the bar of the bed, still holding Natalia's hand in his own. He was about to get up to go see Darcy when he felt a squeeze. Stunned, he raised his head and saw that Natalia had gently squeezed his hand, though she was still unconscious.

"Guys, guys!" he called out. Everyone rushed over to him and he motioned to his hand. The squeeze had only lasted for a second but only Tony had seen it.

"She squeezed my hand! She's in there somewhere, I know it!" Tony was excited but it was short lived when he saw his friend's reactions. They were not smiling along with him.

"Tony," Clint started, "she's unconscious, she couldn't have."

"But she did! I swear! Natasha, if you can hear me, squeeze my hand again." He watched and waited but nothing happened.

"I sear she did it, she squeezed my hand."

Steve put his hand on his shoulder and guided him away from the bed.

"Tony you haven't slept, I know you think you felt something but you couldn't have."

Tony threw Steve's hand off of his shoulder and glared at him before storming out of the lab. He was met by Jemma and the other two agents.

Tony cooled off as Jemma explained their conditions to them. When she got to the part about Darcy having some older injuries, Tony looked ashamed.

"Darcy discovered that it was Natalia after she hacked into the tower and saw that she had left Steve beaten and unconscious. She ran from her but Natalia eventually caught up to her and, well…'

"I understand, no need to go on," Jemma interrupted.

Tony continued with. "I still don't know how Darcy got caught up in this. She must have snuck aboard before we left for Russia and stayed hidden. She's very attached to Natalia and must have wanted to help her."

Tony then thanked her for everything.

"Thank you so much Jemma, I don't know what would have happened if you weren't here. And you too, agents May and Morse, and Skye. Fury already knows what has happened so if he asked for a debriefing you have our permission to report."

Agent May then shook his hand. "Your jet has been refuled and is ready to fly when you want to leave."

Tony then hesitated and looked to Jemma to see if Natalia and Darcy were okay to be moved.

"Darcy is perfectly fine though still unconscious. When she wakes up, she will need supervision due to her concussion, it would be a good idea to keep her awake for a little while. Natalia is stable but she still needs to be hospitalized. I understand that you have a medical wing at the tower?"

"Yes, we have a state of the art facility with some amazing doctors." Tony replied.

"Okay good. I don't see why they shouldn't be able to leave. You must keep an eye on Natalia until you get her there. She is stable for now but there isn't much more I can do for her here."

"Thank you again for all of your help, we will leave within the hour." With that, he went to alert the rest of his team and they all helped get loaded onto their jet.

As they all said their goodbyes, Skye went up to Steve with a collectable Captain America mug and asked if he would sign it, to which he happily did. "Thanks!" she said excitedly. "He's gonna love it!" Steve didn't know who this 'he' was and quickly forgot when he heard the engine start up. Tony was already in the pilot's seat eager to go. He climbed up the ladder and joined his teammates for the long ride ahead. They were going home.

The jet detached from the BUS and they were set on a path to home. They all kept a careful watch on the vitals of the two women and at one point they held their breath as Natalia's vitals dropped. Clint got her steady again and then the rest of the ride was uneventful.

They arrived at the tower and were immediately met with Tony's medical staff. Natalia and Darcy were whisked away and after making sure they were okay, they went to their rooms for some long awaited showers. They decided not to alert Jane to them being back until they were positive everyone was okay. Meeting up an hour later, the tired team headed to the medical wing to check up on their friends.

To their surprise, Darcy was awake and was demanding to see Natalia. She looked pissed at the nurses who were trying to keep her in the bed.

"Hey, hey, hey what's going on!" Tony demanded.

"Tony!" Darcy yelled. The team all rushed over to her and upon seeing the Avengers, the nurses left.

"Tony! Get me the hell out of this bed, I'm fine. I need to see Natasha, is she here? Is she okay?"

"Darcy, calm down," Tony said trying to get her to listen to him.

"Just tell me what the hell is going on!" She demanded

"She's okay! Natalia is here and is restrained. She's hurt but she's stable," Tony shared.

After hearing that she was okay, she finally relaxed and her heartbeat returned back to normal.

"Darcy?" Thor asked. "You called her by Natasha, why?"

"Because it is Natasha you dumbnut. I heard her say her name when Bucky had her tied up. She said it clearly, 'My name is Natasha' blah blah blah." She left out the part about her wishing to die and that major part about her having a daughter, she wasn't sure what to make of that yet.

"Darcy are you sure?" Clint asked with hope.

"Positive, I want to see her."

Tony was ecstatic. "I'll see what I can do." He pressed the call button on Darcy's bed and asked to see her doctor. Hearing that it was Tony Stark who had called, the doctor rushed in faster than expected.

Upon seeing the Avengers gathered there the doctor walked in nervously. "I'm doctor Davis, what can I do for you?"

"Hi there, I would like to know if Darcy here can be discharged." Tony asked matter of factly.

"Well," the doctor began as he read over her chart. "She has a concussion so I would advise that she stay here. She also needs painkillers for her broken rib and…" He was cut off when Tony interrupted him.

"What if we kept an eye on her. I'm sure she would be more comfortable in her own room."

The doctor sighed and thought it over. He knew that they all had medical training for when they were hurt out in the field and he also knew that they were a close knit group.

"I suppose, but I want her to check in with me every day for the next week to update me on her progress. And I know your next question, Ms. Romanoff absolutely cannot leave upon orders from Director Fury until she has had a full medical and psychological analysis."

The team guessed as much about Natasha but they were still glad that she was allowed to be at the Towers medical facility and not a SHIELD one.

"Great!" Darcy said as she whipped the covers off of her and carefully sat up. The team helped her to her feet and they all left to see Natasha.

Upon arriving, they were greeted by a white cell like room with Natasha restrained to a bed in the center. It infuriated the group but there was nothing they could do about it and they were not allowed access to the room. At least they could see her and it helped ease some of their worries.

Darcy was the first one to speak with tears in her eyes. "She doesn't need to be restrained, its Natasha, tell them Tony."

Tony was close to tearing up as well. "I'll speak with Fury, but he will need proof. She has to wake up and go through the tests to prove that it isn't Natalia."

"You believe me though right? That it's really Natasha?"

Tony looked at the dark haired girl before nodding a yes.

After spending some time just watching out for their red headed friend, everyone left and headed back to their private floors. Darcy was reunited with Jane who happy and angry at the same time. They all gathered in the common room and went over the past few hours.

"Okay Darcy, spill." Clint asked as they all waited to hear what had happened aboard the jet.

"Yea yea," she replied as she tried to get comfortable. It was hard since she had a broken rib as well as a few bruised ones.

"Okay, once upon a time, I snuck aboard the jet before yall came on and hid in one of those compartments under the floor. I thought my cover was blown when Loki saw me, but he didn't say anything. Speaking of Loki, where is he?"

She looked to Thor for an answer. "I'm not sure where he went, but he looked so defeated the last time I saw him." Thor said no more so she continued on with her story.

"Well, Loki left and I was still there but I passed out a few times."

"Darcy!" Jane yelled at her.

"I'm sorry but there was no way I was staying here when she was out there and needed help! As I was saying, when you guys left with Bucky I knew I wouldn't have been able to make it out in the snow with my stupid injuries so I waited on board in case you all needed back up or something. I passed out again, and when I came to, we were in the air with Bucky in the pilot's seat and he had Natasha tied up against the wall. I watched as he tortured her and I couldn't do anything about it. It was horrible!" Darcy had started to cry after remembering the pain on Natasha's face.

"I'm sorry you had to see that Darcy, but I think you saved her life by lying on top of her," Steve added.

Darcy smiled at Steve's kindness and was able to go on. "He was saying so many horrible things about her. He kept saying that it was her fault he was shipped off and that she had stayed with Red Room willingly. And that it was her fault he was frozen… ,so many things. When he stabbed her in the stomach though, I had gotten so angry that I just jumped out of that grate and attacked him."

Everyone's eyes lit up in surprise that anyone would do such a thing to the Winter Soldier.

"I tackled him but he threw me off. He eventually had me backed up against Natasha and I could feel the knife still in her stomach poking me in my back. Some alarm sounded at the control panel and it distracted him so I ripped the knife out of her and stabbed him in the neck. He got mad and hit me, hard, and I landed at the pilot's seat. I got an idea so I strapped in and then hit the button to open the door. He got sucked through and there, problem solved. I got Natasha down and tried to stop the bleeding and the next thing I knew I was here.

"You, you tackled the Winter Soldier?" Clint asked disbelievingly.

"Yes I did," she responded.

"All right Darcy!" he exclaimed giving her a high five and laughing along with the rest of the team.

Still laughing, Tony told her about the alarm. "The alarm was SHIELD hacking into the system and rerouting the jet to theirs. They helped us and Jemma patched you and Nat up.

They all talked for a few more hours and then it was deemed safe for Darcy to go to sleep. In fact, they could all use some sleep. After they all said their goodbyes, they went to their respected rooms and slept for the first time in days.


	33. RR33 Thoughts

RR33 Thoughts

Director Fury didn't know why he did it; maybe he just cared about the team more than he had ever realized. He trusted them with his life and they had never once let him down. He had to admit, when the call came from agent Clint Barton the other day about what had happened to one of his best agents, his immediate response was one of worry for Romanoff, not anger at being kept in the dark.

After giving the order of placing Romanoff in a cell, he was contacted by the Avengers to get her out of there. Fury had wanted to do a full psychological analysis on her before she was released, but somehow the Avengers had convinced him to let them handle everything. They truly believed that Natasha Romanoff was back, and that it was no longer Natalia Romanova. He had his doubts, but after contacting agent May and getting her input, he agreed to have Romanoff released into their care. Director Fury was touched at how close his team was; they were closer than ever. This decision was not by the book, but when you are the director of SHIELD, your actions are not challenged. It also helped that these events were also classified and only a handful of people knew about the situation. He would of course be visiting them soon enough for debriefing.

A few hours after the call was placed, Romanoff was moved to a private room in the medical wing and gave the Avengers access. After she was released from the medical wing, she would instead go to her own room in the tower and not be escorted to the SHIELD base for monitoring.

XXXXXX

The Avengers were all gathered in the common room watching a movie and trying not to think about the call Tony had placed to Fury earlier that day. They knew that this could either be bad for them, or be good for them, with no room for interpretation. They were afraid of making the director mad and him having Natasha removed from the tower completely. When Tony's phone rang, everyone jumped in nervous surprise and the room went dead quiet as they listened in on the phone conversation.

"Hey there Tony, it's Maria Hill."

"Umm, hey there Maria, how is Fury doing today? I heard he recently got a new eye patch, that's exciting huh? And how are you? We haven't heard from you in a while, got to be busy handling all of Fury's things huh?" Tony was nervous, he was wondering why Maria was calling instead of Fury. He wasn't sure if it was a good thing or a bad thing. The rest of the team looked just as nervous as they listened to the conversation on speaker phone.

"Cut the shit Tony, do you want to know or not?" She asked in her usual blunt way.

"Yes, we want to know, sorry."

"I don't know how you did it but you guys won. Romanoff is out of the cell and is currently in her own private room in the medical wing. You guys have complete access and when she wakes up, Fury wants you guys to be there. She can go back to her room up there with you guys when she's ready."

Tony couldn't believe what he had just heard; the rest Avengers couldn't believe it either since they had listened in as well. "Thank you Maria, thank you so much. And thank Fury for us; I'm sure he doesn't want us to bother him by calling."

"No problem; and Tony?" she asked.

"Yea Hill?"

"Let me know how she's doing, keep me updated. She's had my back countless times and I want her to know that I have hers."

"Will do Hill, thank you." Tony was in shock, Fury would have never allowed this for anyone else. He didn't dwell on it for too long though, he wanted to see his friend.

After they disconnected, it was a race to the medical wing, literally. Tony was in the lead closely followed by Clint and then Steve. Thor picked up Darcy into his arms and was rushing after them with Jane coming up last. It was quite awkward when they were in the elevator but as soon as the doors opened, the race was back on.

They all made it to Natasha's room at about the same time and entered quietly as well as in a more civil manner than how they got there. Natasha was still in a medically induced coma and looked peaceful. She had deep bruising all over her body and she was still bandaged up. Her color was back though and her breathing was more normal.

After meeting with Natasha's doctor, it was decided to let her wake up from the coma. He said that it could take all day for her to finally wake but the team didn't care, they would be by her side through it all.

Sitting in their chairs around the bed, they chatted quietly amongst themselves, though Darcy was the first to speak up.

XXXXXX

Darcy couldn't help but remember the things Natasha had said after the Winter Soldier had plunged the knife into the red heads stomach_. "My name is Natasha, and you just gave me what I wanted; death. Now I can join my daughter."_

The Black Widow wanted to die. The look that she had on her face told Darcy that she was actually happy about dying. And she had a daughter? She 'wanted to join her daughter', so was her daughter dead? Is that why she wanted to die? Darcy started piecing things together and decided that whatever Loki gave back to her was the memory of her daughter. She couldn't be sure but one thing she did know, Natasha might do anything to die. Once she realizes what she did to her team and then what happened to her daughter, she thought that would be enough to make anyone take their life; Darcy couldn't let that happen.

"Hey guys?" she asked sheepishly.

They all looked at her as she spoke.

"Maybe we should restrain her again, just in case I mean."

Tony looked at her with what he thought was understanding. "Darcy, you don't have to be afraid of her, its Natasha, you said so yourself."

"I know, but it's not that. What if she tries to hurt herself? I mean, she did put all you guys on your asses, almost killed yall, and Bruce is still in his coma…" She layed it all out but kept the most important part out; Natasha may not want anyone to know.

Tony then understood what she was saying. They all talked it over and then agreed with the decision to restrain Natasha. Clint did the honors and then they all settled back in and waited for her to wake up.

XXXXXX

Natasha was in a coma for a total of six days. Internally, she felt like she was floating on a cloud some of the time, and then at other times felt like her insides were on fire. It went on like this every day and around the time she was due for pain meds in her IV, she layed paralyzed in extreme pain, unable to move or wake up. She heard voices some of the time but they sounded muffled and she was always too tired from the pain to try and make sense of it. She hoped that whatever was going on that she would die soon, though she wasn't exactly sure why she wanted to; thinking was just too hard.

At some point, Natasha's mind started to clear and external feeling started to return to her body. Her insides felt like they were on fire, but she was used to that. She started to feel other things, like the cushion of a bed beneath her and the softness of the sheets that covered her body. She then started to feel the scratchy bandages on her body and then the pain from underneath them.

As soon as she started to feel that new pain she tensed up and then smells invaded her senses. She smelled the chemical scent of cleaning products, and the metallic smell she always associated with a hospital. Was she in a hospital? She assumed so but her eyes wouldn't open yet for her to find out.

A deafening sound then tore through her senses and she felt her body flinch. It kept repeating over and over until it started to fade out to a dull beeping. It was annoying but she decided that it wasn't as loud as she had originally thought. Maybe it was just a monitor she was hooked up to?

All of these senses returned in phases until she felt as if her body would finally respond to her commands. After a few tries, she was finally able to open her eyes, and what she saw was a room full of people surrounding her on all sides.

XXXXXX

It was near 9 o'clock at night when Natasha's monitors started beeping. It was a soft beeping noise but it alerted the team to a change in their friend's vitals. Her blood pressure started to rise to a normal level and her breathing evened out. Her brain waves showed increased activity and they knew that all of that meant that she was close to waking up.

The team all watched her anxiously. She tensed up at one point but the doctor had said that she may do that when she started to feel the pain. She would feel the pain more now since she wasn't in such a deep sleep. After a few more minutes of waiting, the team smiled as Natasha's eyes fluttered open.

XXXXXX

The moment Natasha's eyes opened, the team breathed out a sigh of relief. They saw confusion sweep across the woman's face as she tried to remember what had happened and what was going on. Once she pieced it all together, they saw pain flash into her eyes. Not just physical pain, psychological pain of everything that had happened.

Darcy watched as all of Natasha's emotions splayed across her face. She wasn't at all surprised when the red head demanded to for everyone to leave so she could be left alone.

Natasha started yelling at them to leave and they refused, thinking that they could ease her fears about her hurting them. Darcy knew the real reason though, this was the first time she was fully conscious since she got her full memory back.

"I'll stay with her you guys," she said after seeing the distressed look in their eyes. Tony looked as if he wanted to be the one there for her and glared at Darcy for her offer. Finally respecting Natasha's wishes, they all left with the promise of Darcy staying there to keep an eye on her. When the door closed, she walked over to her friends' bedside and put her hand over Natasha's.

Natasha pulled her hand away as far as she could and turned her head away from her.

"We know it's you Natasha and not Natalia. None of us are upset about what has happened." She was trying her best to get the woman to talk to her.

"Oh really now," Natasha finally said as she turned back to her and glared. "Then why am I restrained to this bed then?"

Taken aback by the intensity of the glare, she sat down but also moved her chair closer. "It was my idea, they didn't want to."

Tears started to well up in the red heads eyes. "I'm sorry for what she did to you, to all of you."

Darcy grabbed Natasha's hand again and this time she didn't pull it back. "That's not why I asked them to put them on, though they think that's why. Do you remember what happened on the jet with Bucky?"

Natasha closed her eyes and nodded. When she opened them again, Darcy took it as a sign to continue. "I was there with both of you."

Natasha was shocked but looked more interested in the conversation now.

"I was there with yall. I snuck aboard the jet and hid when the team went to try and find you. Yea I was still pretty beat up from when I kicked Natalia's ass in that alley but there was no way I was going to stay here when you needed help. I hid in a grate, passed out and then came to when Bucky had you tied to the wall. I heard and saw everything that happened Natasha."

Natasha took a few moments to absorb what she had said, and then it hit her. She knew why Darcy wanted her restrained.

"You heard what I said to him didn't you?" She asked Darcy with a tremble in her voice.

Darcy nodded her head and then Natasha started crying. She got up from her chair and hugged the assassin. To her surprise, Natasha leaned into her for comfort. When she finally pulled herself together, a look of fear flashed into her eyes.

"The others, do they…" Darcy cut her question off with a "No," and it seemed to relax the woman.

"I didn't tell them so no one but me knows. I'll take this secret to my grave if you want me to but I want you to know I'm here for you."

This had to be the most serious conversation Darcy had ever had with someone; she seemed to have lost her sarcasm in the seriousness of the situation. After realizing this, she pushed the thought out of her head when Natasha asked her another question.

"So what happens now?"

Darcy had no idea. "I don't know, I guess just take it one day at a time. I know that you want for your life to be over, and I'm afraid that you are going to try something. Maybe if you told me a little bit about what happened with your daughter then I might understand, maybe even change your mind?"

She watched as Natasha's face fell. Sadness just seemed to consume her and it killed Darcy that she brought it up. "I'm sorry, this is too soon, I shouldn't have asked."

The two sat in silence for a good while. Darcy was still holding Natasha's hand but the red head had her face turned away from her. She was in pain from all that had happened but she was at her limit for pain medication. Natasha just had to breathe through it. The thoughts about Ksenia didn't help; eventually though, Natasha broke the silence.

"Ksenia," Natasha said.

Darcy smiled even though she still felt horrible. "That's a beautiful name."

Though she had to stop a lot, Natasha broke down and finally explained everything that had happened since she had become pregnant. An hour had gone by as the story was told and Darcy finally started to understand how Natasha was feeling, and it was crushing. To have something you loved suddenly and violently ripped away from you… Darcy couldn't even imagine the pain Natasha was feeling right now.

"I just don't know how to get through it Darce," Natasha finished.

"I'm here and I won't leave you okay? You will get through this, we will together. No one else has to know unless you want them too."

Natasha's heart thawed out a little and she finally started to have some hope. It helped that the girl knew and she felt as if she could tell her anything. It would have been too much if the whole team knew, they would worry so much to the point where she wouldn't have been able to stand it. It was weird trusting someone new but she was genuine.

Darcy watched as Natasha was becoming fidgety. It couldn't be comfortable being restrained in place. She thought about everything that was said and decided that Natasha wasn't going to try anything, at least as long as she was there with her.

"Okay buttercup, I'll take the restraints off now, they have got to be uncomfortable, especially with your bandages rubbing underneath them." As she reached for the buckle, she saw the hesitant look in Natasha's eyes. "I'm here for you okay? I won't leave."

Natasha then allowed her to take them off and she was finally able to stretch her arms out, though carefully since the movement pulled at her stiches. She wasn't healing like Natalia was before, though she wasn't sure quite why. She would figure it out later.

It was late by the time Darcy had Natasha calmed down and comfortable enough to get some sleep. She never understood why people were still tired after they had just woken up from a coma. When she was sure that Natasha was asleep, she allowed herself to get comfortable and she drifted off to sleep as well.

The next day, Natasha felt up to some more company. The Avengers all came in and spent some time with her. She apologized for everything that had happened but they wouldn't hear it. They told her that none of it was her fault and there was no need for apologizing. Every time she tried to say something about the matter they would cut her off and change the subject; even when she asked about Bruce. They wouldn't tell her his condition but she knew Darcy would let her know later. The Avengers all thought they were protecting her from misery but she was already miserable.

One of the things that kept making her miserable was Tony's constant apologies about how sorry he was to put her through it all. Darcy saw how uncomfortable it made her every time he brought it up so she would steer the conversation away. Natasha shot her a thankful look every time. After a few hours of company, the team saw how tired she looked and said their goodbyes. Tony wanted to stay but Natasha assured him that she was fine and that Darcy would be there.

XXXXXX

After a few days in the medical wing, Natasha's doctor and nurses were more than glad to discharge her. She had been giving them hell and the rest of the team thought she was getting back to her old self. Only Darcy knew that this was just a front and that she was trying to be strong.

Darcy insisted that she move into Natasha's room with her after she was released and Natasha immediately objected. There was no way she was going to room with another person; she couldn't even stand it when she and Clint would share a room on missions. Natasha was more of a loner and didn't want to have to worry about another person in her space. The more she thought about it though, the more it started to make sense.

She knew damn well that she wasn't herself lately. All of these feelings of despair and misery were new to her and Darcy was right, she may end up doing something to herself. She had never remembered Ksenia before and now that she thought about her every day, she believed it could push her over the edge. The millions of things that were constantly running through her head could put her team in danger if danger were to arise. She would never forgive herself if something like that would happen. So many things were stirring in her mind and it was about to drive her crazy. Over and over she thought of Ksenia, her loving the feeling of plunging the knife into Bruce's body, Ksenia, the feeling of almost killing Steve, Ksenia, attacking Tony and Clint, her almost killing Darcy, Ksenia again, her reliving all of her other kills in the Red Room, more about Ksenia… She couldn't shut it off.

It was Darcy who would recognize when Natasha was losing herself and would pull her out of it. So maybe it was a good idea for her to move in.

Later that day, Natasha had moved back into her room. Most of her bruises had vanished except for a few that were now a deep purple and green that were being stubborn at fading. She had healed enough that her stitches were removed, though they needed to be bandaged for the next few days. She kicked the painkillers because the pain was a sort of distraction to her from her own mind. Her ribs still burned but they were healing, and her two stab wounds were still not out of the woods yet. She was instructed to take it slow so she wouldn't damage the new tissue growth. She wasn't allowed to pick up anything heavy or do any workouts, move a certain way, or submerge her wounds in any water. A short shower was deemed okay though.

After getting Natasha settled back into her room, Darcy asked if she would be okay by herself while she went to get some of her own things to move into the room. Natasha had an extra room in her suite that she never used so that's where Darcy would be moving to. They would both have their privacy but Darcy could still keep an eye on her.

"Are you cool if I go get some of my stuff? I'll be back before you know it." Darcy felt nervous about leaving the red head alone but thought that a few minutes wouldn't hurt.

Natasha didn't think anything of it. "Yea I'm good. I'm going to get a quick shower anyways, these stupid bandages itch and I can't wait to get them off."

Reassured, Darcy left and Natasha moved to her bathroom and started to remove her arm bandages. She swore at James the entire time that if they left a scar, she would hunt him down and give him a scar he would never forget. It looked like a scene out of a horror movie. Even though they were healing, it was unnerving to see long gashes going up your arms. She then removed her clothes and took off her other bandages, pleased to see that they weren't as gross looking.

She hissed when the warm water of her shower touched her wounds but quickly acclimated to the pain. It felt good to use her own shower after so long and she just wanted to melt into the comfort. That was short lived though when she bent over to pick up her shampoo. She forgot she wasn't supposed to move so fast and it shot a bolt of pain right into her midsection where she was stabbed. She recovered quickly but the sharp feeling reminded her of that night in the cave when Ksenia was born.

She rushed through the rest of the shower, wanting to get out of there and away from that feeling. Natasha dried off quickly but carefully and got into a new change of clothes. Starting to reapply new bandages, she stopped as tears filled her eyes and made her vision blurry. Bad thoughts started to fill her head and she had to sit down and catch her breath.

As these thoughts took over her brain, she tried to distract herself. She tried to think of other things but the only other thing that popped into her head was Loki. Where was he? And why hasn't he come to see if she was okay? Did he hate her now?

"Loki!" she screamed out in the foggy bathroom air. "Loki! I need to talk to you, please!" She waited, but no one answered. She heard Darcy return to the room so she got up and cracked the bathroom door to let her know that she was okay, though she was far from okay. If she didn't, she knew that the young girl would barge in anyways. 

Darcy came to the cracked door and knocked. "Hey dude, I'm back. You okay in there?"

Putting on a face, she replied with a yes before she went and pushed the door the rest of the way open to let Darcy in.

The young girl walked in and hopped up on the bathroom counter and watched as Natasha put her fresh bandages on. Natasha caught her staring and asked in an annoyed tone, "what?"

"That looks badass. I mean look at it!" Darcy had no filter on her mouth but that was one of the things Natasha liked about her; she told things as it was.

Natasha shot her a death glare and the girls face fell in pretend hurt. It amused the red head so she smiled as she continued to finish the bandaging, forgetting the thoughts that had invaded her head only minutes before.


	34. RR34 Surrender

RR34 – Surrender

The next few days at the tower were hard on Natasha. Her mind was a dark place but she put on a show for her team. Darcy on the other hand was with her every step of the way and knew what was going on. Darcy thought she looked better, and she was. Though it hurt like hell, Natasha tried her best to get out of her depressed mood. She couldn't heal as fast as she did when she was Natalia and she wondered why that was happening. Though she still healed more quickly than the average human, it was slower than just a week before. Even though they had shared the same body, their minds were completely different. She, as well as Darcy started to think that the link to accelerated healing was blocked somehow due to trauma.

Natasha was having trouble sleeping. Darcy would hear her cry out multiple times a night and would go to her side to comfort her, but was always pushed away. In a way, it made Darcy happy that the old Natasha was there trying to be strong, but it also made her sad that she wouldn't let her in during those moments. She would hear her cry out for Ksenia and even Loki to her surprise. She would beg Loki to come to her and Darcy went back to hating the god for abandoning her like this. Natasha needed answers and to talk over things and Darcy couldn't provide much help since she wasn't there.

Right before the tower quieted down for the night, Natasha heard a soft knock at her door. She really did not feel like talking tonight, but she promised herself to make an effort. Passing the space from her bed to the door, she opened it to see Tony standing there, alone and looking depressed. He had avoided being with her one on one, always with someone else. He didn't think she would notice how bad the whole event had affected him, but she noticed. She had decided to let him come to her if he needed to talk about anything.

"Hey Tony, you okay?" he looked at her in surprise.

"Me? Oh yea, I'm fine." He then just stared at her, making the whole situation awkward.

Not knowing what to do, she invited him and closed the door behind them. Hearing the knock, Darcy came from her room and plopped onto the foot of Natasha's bed. Natasha went and sat by the headboard and Tony kind of just stood there, not knowing how to bring the conversation up.

Though he had practiced it a million times over in his head, he forgot what he was going to say.

"Nat, I'm so so sorry, but would saying 'sorry' make any difference? Does it ever? It's just a word. One word against a thousand actions and I…" he was rambling, something he told himself not to do.

"Tony stop," Natasha urged him.

"Why? I just don't know how to make things right, I don't know what to say, what to do…" He looked so sad.

"You have already apologized to me, and I'll tell you again, there isn't anything to apologize for. I agreed to go back; I helped you build the machine. Nothing is your fault Tony, I'm fine."

"Then why are you hiding?" Tony did it; he asked the question that had been bugging him since she came back. Something else had to have happened to her to make her eyes seem so empty, to make her walk as if she was carrying a heavy load, and to make her laugh. The old Natasha laughed, but not the way she had since she came back. It was too forced and she didn't have that mischievous grin anymore.

Natasha looked alarmed. "Hiding? I haven't been hiding. What the hell are you talking about Tony?"

It made Tony happy to see some of the fire in her eyes. He loved making her mad, he loved making everyone mad but she always fought back.

"Natasha, talk to me. I want to know what's wrong, I know something else happened." He looked at her worried face and knew that she was indeed hiding something.

"Nothing happened, Tony," she said in denial.

"Yes it did," he countered back.

"How do you know what happened?"

"Reverse psychology, you just admitted that something happened." He was feeling smug.

"I did not, I just…" Before she could finish her sentence, Darcy took this moment to speak.

"Hey red, he's right, he only said he thinks something happened and you basically asked him how he knows what happened so now he knows that something indeed did happen, I think."

She didn't have any time to move as Natasha hurled a pillow at her, knocking her off the bed with a surprised scream.

Natasha and Tony started laughing as Darcy tried to collect herself and brush off the hundreds of feathers that came from the exploded pillow.

"Me and my big mouth," she grumbled as she took her place back on the bed. She then looked at Natasha in her eyes, pleading with her to tell Tony. So many words passed through them with just that glance, but Natasha gave a tiny nod no. Tony didn't see that or the small gesture Natasha made to Darcy for her to leave them alone for a bit.

"Well guys," Darcy sighed, "I'll be leaving you two alone now while I go and de-feather myself. Don't be sucking face while I'm gone!"

Tony looked horrified at her comment, he only saw Natasha as a close friend and it worried him that others could look at them like that. Then he realized this was Darcy speaking, and she was just a smartass. He would never ever leave Pepper. He smiled at the thought of the ring he was going to propose to her with, sitting in a safe in his lab.

When Darcy was back in her room, Tony tried to think of a way to make it up to her.

"Maybe I could build something to take away the memories again? Or maybe dull them down?"

"Tony no, I need them." She hesitated, thinking about letting him know. She looked over to Darcy's room and saw her peeking through the door, trying to encourage her to finally admit it. But she couldn't. She couldn't hurt Tony like that, letting him know that she is now stuck with the tragic memory of her daughter's death.

"Why Nat, why do you need those painful memories?" He asked.

"Because, they remind me that I have true friends in this world. Friends that actually care about me that I can trust." She needed him to know some truth, just not the whole truth.

"What do you mean?" he asked confused.

"When I was in that hospital bed, I wanted to let go, I wanted to die in that moment."

Tony looked horrified.

"No Tony, that same moment I was about to let go, I heard you telling me to come back. Somehow it made me hold on."

"I knew it!" Tony yelled excitedly. "I knew you squeezed my hand back, no one believed me."

"Yea yea, don't get all sappy on me," she said with a roll of her eyes.

"Are you really okay Nat?" He looked at her seriously, looking for any trace of a lie.

She smiled and said, "I will be."

Tony decided that she was actually okay, and thought that maybe he was making everything up about seeing her so dead inside. It still bothered him how she asked 'him how did he know'. He felt as though he broke down some of her wall and now he felt a lot better.

"Thanks red, I'll leave you alone now. I hear my bed calling me."

"Goodnight Tony, and thanks."

Tony left feeling like a weight had been lifted off his chest and fell asleep more peaceful.

Later that night as Natasha was fighting sleep once again, she tried calling out for Loki. Like usual, he never showed up. Could he even hear her? Did he care? The darkness started to creep in once more and she felt like dying. She was grasping at something to hang on to so she could pull herself out of the hole. She thought about Ksenia again, and in that moment, she felt peaceful. She needed to know where Ksenia was, to find closure. As she closed her eyes and tried to picture those beautiful violet eyes, a cold hand pressed over her face cutting off her air supply.

Her eyes flew open, trying to adjust to the darkness of her room. She grabbed onto the arm that was holding her down and felt freezing cold metal. _Shit_, she thought. She kicked the sheets off her body and threw a leg up, catching Bucky on his jaw. His grip loosened and Natasha used that moment to pry it off her face. She kicked her leg up again but this time he caught it and used it to swing her into the wall behind him. She took the impact and blocked out the pain as she shot up and tackled him onto the bed. She wrapped her legs around his midsection and started swinging at his face, hating him for torturing her and for hurting Darcy. She got a few good hits in until he grabbed her wrist and twisted it, making her clench her teeth so she wouldn't cry out and give him the satisfaction. Using his other hand, he struck her in the stomach, making her fall off him and hit the floor. Bucky jumped off the bed and delivered a swift kick to her ribs before taking her by the throat and pinning her to the wall. She felt his grip tighten and could already feel the bruises start to form. Jabbing her knee up, she caught him in the abdomen and he dropped her to the floor. She landed with a loud thud but being at the perfect height, she hit him hard in the knee, feeling it pop backwards. As he fell, she grabbed her widows bite from her bedside table and shot him with it, paralyzing him temporarily. He had fallen onto his side, so she knelt beside him and flashed her knife in his face.

"See this?" she asked him. His eyes glanced to her knife and then back to her face, amusement flashing in his eyes."

"Oh this won't be fun," she taunted him as she moved down and removed his shoe. She made a tiny cut right behind his ankle, no deeper than a papercut. "Right here, right where you feel that little sting is the Achilles heel. Cut that and it zips back up to the knee; sounds like a firecracker."

She glanced back up to him to see fear in his eyes. She laughed as she waved the knife at him.

"But don't worry," she said as she dropped the knife, "that isn't me anymore."

Just as she turned to alert the Avengers, Darcy came from her room.

"What's with the maniacal laughing at freakin' 2o'clock in the morning?"

`Bucky finally came out of the temporary paralysis and used her distraction to grab the knife and plunge it into at Natalia's leg. She hit the ground as Bucky shot up and noticed Darcy. He saw the fear flash before her eyes, and anger clouded his senses. This measly little girl had gotten the best of him and dropped him out of a plane. He went to run at her, meaning to hurl her out of the window but a hand caught his leg, pulling him to the ground. Natasha had grabbed him and pulled him down. She rolled over to Darcy and stood before the paralyzed girl, knife in hand, ready to defend her. Bucky rose from the ground and faced the two women. He got closer and faked a hit to Natasha's face, making her bring the knife up to protect herself. He instead moved at the last second, ramming himself into her and knocking her to the ground. By this time, JARVIS had alerted the Avengers to the intruder and they shot from their rooms, racing for Natasha's floor.

The impact of the fall made it hard for Natasha to get up so Darcy stood in front of her this time, taser in hand. Confusion swept across his face as the anger started to leave him.

For the first time that night, he spoke. "Why do you protect that murderer?"

"Because she's my friend," Darcy shot back quickly. "She isn't who you think she is, she left her old life behind, she's Natasha now, Natalia is gone."

Natasha was able to pull herself up and stood, trying to pull Darcy behind her again.

"She has saved so many lives, even Steve's a few times. Natasha is good, you are the only bad one here."

The girl struck a nerve in Bucky. He thought about what she said and then recalled how Natasha could have seriously injured him by cutting his heel. He walked closer to the two and then looked Natasha in the eyes. They stared defiantly back at him, but he could tell that this was not his old comrade. He then knelt down and picked up the knife. He could almost feel Darcy shaking. He then rose, and presented the hilt of the knife to Natasha. She took it, bracing herself for some sort of trick, but it never came. He backed away and headed for the window. The rest of the avengers finally made it to Natasha's floor and they barged in, only able to see Bucky leaping from the window to who knows what below, they were pretty high up in the tower. Steve ran to the window while Clint, Thor, and Tony ran to the girls.

The boys all spoke at once asking if they were okay and Clint poking Natasha's injuries.

"Were fine," Natasha said annoyed, "Stop poking me Clint! That hurts!"

He mumbled a sorry, knowing that she really didn't mean anything by it. She hated being at the center of attention but he needed to assess her wounds.

"You need that dressed by the way." He said referring to her bleeding leg. And take it easy Nat, no more beating up bad guys."

Natasha nodded thanks to him but promised to dress it herself, and then explained what happened. They could hardly believe it when they told him that he had surrendered. After all the fuss was over, the boys left the room to go back to bed and Natasha climbed into bed with Darcy since her bed was all messed up and a little bloody.

Natasha couldn't find sleep. Grunting from a sore body, she climbed out of bed an hour after Darcy had fallen asleep and decided to go to the roof for some fresh air and to think about things. She crept out of bed quietly so she wouldn't wake Darcy. Opening her bedroom door, she slipped into the hallway and entered the private elevator. She hit the button to the roof and stepped out into the cool night air. The cold breeze that blew at that height made goosebumps cover her bare arms and legs. She almost wished that she had worn a jacket and pants instead of her tank top and shorts, but decided not to go back to fetch them. Moving closer to the edge of the tower, she was surprised to see herself not alone.

There, staring off the edge of the tower was a familiar raven-haired god. Loki had finally come.


End file.
